DeSantis Blasts Other Forty-nine States for Making Florida Look Bad

  

Category:  Satire

Via:  hallux  •  4 months ago  •  6 comments

By:   Andy Borowitz

DeSantis Blasts Other Forty-nine States for Making Florida Look Bad
“Nice try, other forty-nine states,” he bellowed. “I’m onto you!”

S E E D E D   C O N T E N T



TALLAHASSEE ( The Borowitz Report )—In his most scathing assignment of blame to date, Florida Governor Ron DeSantis blasted the other forty-nine states for conspiring to make his own look bad.

“Our   covid   numbers wouldn’t seem so terrible if other states’ numbers weren’t better,” he said. “You don’t have to be a detective to figure out who stands to benefit from this scenario.”

“Nice try, other forty-nine states,” he bellowed. “I’m onto you!”

DeSantis’s remarks drew a strong rebuke from a fellow Republican governor, Greg Abbott of Texas.

“If you look at our   covid   numbers, you’ll find that Texas has been doing everything in our power to make Florida look good,” he said. “Ron DeSantis’s comments are very hurtful.”

Immediately following Abbott’s statement, DeSantis issued a heartfelt apology. “I appreciate everything Texas has done to make Florida look good,” he said. “But the other forty-eight states still suck.”


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Hallux
Sophomore Principal
1  seeder  Hallux    4 months ago

Someone stupid said, "it is what it is".

 
 
 
Kavika
Professor Principal
2  Kavika     4 months ago

Over 20,000 new Covid cases today. 

yeah, Florida is doing just fine.

 
 
 
JBB
Professor Principal
2.1  JBB  replied to  Kavika @2    4 months ago

Yet Desantis made it illegal for private businesses to require customers or staff take normal precautions.

 
 
 
Kavika
Professor Principal
2.1.1  Kavika   replied to  JBB @2.1    4 months ago
Yet Desantis made it illegal for private businesses to require customers or staff take normal precautions.

He did and more and more are not paying any attention to the order, Disney World and the Cruise Lines are the leaders in that movement right now.

 
 
 
Hallux
Sophomore Principal
2.2  seeder  Hallux  replied to  Kavika @2    4 months ago

It'll be over by yesterday.

 
 
 
JBB
Professor Principal
3  JBB    4 months ago

Yes, and blaming immigrants is not working either!

 
 
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