Schwag
About 2 miles down the road, lives the Millers. The 60ish couple are considered "old money", leastways around this county. What makes them special is they run a private bar/tavern on their estate. It's actually open to the public but as the Millers don't advertise, you have to know it's here.....and I forgot to say, it's a biker hangout.
During the summer is when they rake in the cash. Big outside parties on weekends; Beer, food and entertainment --- all the necessities. This is when people from "the outside" come in and with them, the occasional FIB.
Just so you know, FIB is a courteous northern Wisconsin acronym that describes boorish or assholish behavior; Fucking Illinois Bastard . Lots of people from Illinois vacation up here during the summer. This is to say, we love your money but you people think your shit doesnt stink.
Anyways, one night this summer two very nasty looking hombres just sauntered in. One said they heard about this place from Chong. We all know who Chong is, so they were cool. They talked a lot of shit about being kingpins and one of them took out of his pocket, about a dimes worth of what he called numbero uno, prime. He invited the whole bar to help him smoke from this giant hookah.
He had a great looking hookah and everyone complimented him for that. But as it turned out what this clown really had is numbero uno, prime SCHWAG. Couldnt get a fly off. I told him that maybe his stuff worked out well in Chicago or anywhere in Illinois for that matter, but not up here.
They took the cue and skedaddled. He didnt obviously know, up here, the #1 houseplant is often referred to as Creeper.
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This guy probably got ahold of some hemp instead of pot . It is starting to be more commonly grown ...
Hey Aeon... Is that you in the pic?
Anywho, Matt went to school at UWM, so he knew what you were talking about.
Well the joke was on him. But a coolhookah will almost make you not notice that you feel about the same as before you met thehookah.
In my day, skunkweed was the one thing you never wanted to get caught with. But then again, we had no local weed that looked like the real thing.
Aeon--
Very cute rap, babe, tnx for a nice change of pace article. I'll offer you whatI think might beone of the ultimate schwag stories, from a friend of mine who used to live in Washington (state):
John & a buddy prepped well in advanceto grow some killer reefer... spent one summer & fall hauling fish offal from a cannery and tilling it into their plot, then the following spring put in seedlings, pruned their plants, watered regularly, the whole nine yards. Beautiful results-- bushy plants with massive buds, hung in an old shed & slow-dried, etc etc. Got a couple kilos of gorgeous-looking shit. Only one drawback to this hippy fantasy--- when smoked, the stuff did deliver a terrific buzz, but it smelled and tastedlike rotten fish heads. Couldn't sell it, couldn't even give it away to their friends after one taste of it.
I asked him what they ended up doing with it, and he replied, "Well, we'd toke up and then go hurl, and toke and and hurl some more, and..."
It's a "morph" and courtesy of 'CS6."
Aeon,
If you want a link to your site, I don't mind putting it under sites we love.
Hash, window pane and black mollies. Yummy stuff in the early 70's.
I do remember the good parts.
Anytime somebody has to start braggin' their stuff up, or givin' it names, I know what's in my oneie is probably better anyways.