WARNING: New PAN-DAMN- IT Virus Spreading through RED-NECK states! - NO Known CURE!
The CDC, or an agency with similar initials, has declared a NATIONAL HEALTH WARNING.
Drs. Ding-A-Ling and Ding Dong, conjoined Siamese Twins stated, faced up from the barroom floor (that they were examining all night, for signs of a "virulent virus", unknown PATHOGENE that is sweeping through the South and Southwest as rapidly as Sherman's Army matched through Georgia, in search of Marjorie Taylor Green, the suspected infected carrier.
However, within the medical community, a clamor of descent sprang up among those who could read, claiming that this virus is "utter bull chips", tossed about my loosed-lipped Liberals from the East Coast, who are nothing but, "spineless, trouble-makers, Ivy School drop-outs, smug, rich-white-entitled-spoiled-rotten Socialist-Communists trying to stir up Red Neck in Red State, with Red Hats, wearing silly, kids' caps.
As nearly every reasonable citizen in 'Mur-Ree-KKKKa knows, these contaminated, cheap hats are made in China by Communist Chinese workers making $1.00 per hour and forced to work 10 hours per day, six days per week, or until they drop dead.
The PATH-DAMN-IT Symptoms include:
Brain Fog
Brain Lag
Anger
Frustration
Self-loathing
Poor Spellers
Alcoholics
Wife Beaters
Listlessness
Depression
No Interest in Sex and an overpowering urge to be drawn into
Violent conflicts with "White-Hillbilly, Trailor-Park- Trash Cans, Gun-Freaks, and Maga-Loons
The virus, according to Jonathan Livingston Lipschitz, the highest-ranking officer for the CDC (Center for Disease Containment, now relocated to Waun, China, appears to attack sections of the brain known as "Stupid Cells", rapidly expands them thorough out the host's entire body, causing their face and neck to turn red.
The long-term effect is suspected to turn its victims into compliant, spineless idiots willing to follow any LYING DIP-SHAT that crosses their path.
Making it difficult, in the South to Cross the Street, read books, or bathe.
"Doctored" Lipschitz has named this new virus: "Trump Suckers", due to their zombie-like, Trump-idolizing addiction to the dumbest loser who ever walked the earth!
The only known advice is to "Put a Bag Over Their Head and Shut Them the FU!"
This is a HEALTH TIP from Medical Marijuana Users in Lipshitz, Ohio, where there are NO JOBS, not even Blow Jobs.
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The Truth, The Hold Truth, and NOTHING, but the TOOTH, so help me Geoffrey!
There have been those, here on the "News Talkers. communists' site, that doubt the validity of "Doctored" Jonathan Livingston Lipschitz's veracity, but they have been dealt with by Putin, who is a frequent visitor.
He loves to read stories to the children, then eat them.
Please, feel free to post your asinine, whining, incomprehensible here. We like hot trash, snarky retort, and angry, foaming comments ablaze with vitriolic comments to stimulate the mind.
That, Girl is a very SEXY photo.
I post mine.
That picture is burnt into my eyes.... My Eyes! My eyes! my.... eyes... my grrrbblleelrrrr
We post on the back of our Research Paper a detailed DISCLAIMER that prevents readers from suing us, but not from sending MONEY. (Cash only)
terminal gooberitis...
Yes, indeed, and Gubber was a very dear friend who got his tongue caught in the CORK SACKING machine, and now is mute.
Just have to wonder if the town is named after the doctor....
Yes, Wizard, it is. Only a few keen people know this. It is very HUSH-HUSH, BRUSH-BRUSH, top secret SHAT! Keep it under your hat.
We are Celebrating National Trump Indictment Day, next Tuesday. Please stop by and say, "I am HIGH". We just hop, skip, and drunk from Commonsense. Just
make a SHARP RIGHT TURN from anywhere in 'Mureka, and you'll be rite dare.
"The world will little note, nor long remember what is written here, but it can NEVER forget what THEY (J6 MAGA-LUNATICS) did here!"
Killed fellow Americans, attacked and physically injured 145 police officers, did over
Three (3) million dollars of damage to our Capital Building, stole government documents, spread feces on the "Hallowed Halls" of the Chamber walls, threaten to hang Vice President Pence, called out Pelosi, AOC, and other representatives by name-threatening to harm to them.
Are these respectful ways for self-declared PATRIOTIC should act?