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Secret Service Vows To Find Out What Went Wrong At The Trump Rally As Soon As They Figure Out Who Left Cocaine In The White House

  

Category:  The Zoo

Via:  gregtx  •  3 months ago  •  15 comments

Secret Service Vows To Find Out What Went Wrong At The Trump Rally As Soon As They Figure Out Who Left Cocaine In The White House
WASHINGTON, D.C. — As authorities sought to piece together the puzzle of glaring security failures in the attempted assassination of former President Donald Trump, the Secret Service vowed to find out what went wrong at the Trump rally as soon as they figure out who left cocaine in the White House.

S E E D E D   C O N T E N T


WASHINGTON, D.C. — As authorities sought to piece together the puzzle of glaring security failures in the attempted assassination of former President Donald Trump, the Secret Service vowed to find out what went wrong at the Trump rally as soon as they figure out who left cocaine in the White House.

"One mystery at a time, people," Secret Service spokesperson Jeanine Harper. "We'll get right on that once we finally get to the bottom of this conundrum about who could have possibly left a bag of cocaine in the White House. All in good time."

Federal agents reportedly remained stumped regarding the source of the White House cocaine despite working closely with President Biden's son, Hunter, to follow the trail. "He's the cocaine expert," Harper explained. "His knowledge of blow and where it can be obtained and preferred hiding places is invaluable. We'll figure it out one of these days. Once we do, we'll totally get to the bottom of the whole Trump shooter thing. Trust us."

Sources within the Secret Service disclosed that agents had agreed to Hunter's plan to have him purchase large quantities of cocaine and stash them in various places within the White House to help investigators hone their skills.

At publishing time, government insiders said they believed solving the issues surrounding the attempted assassination of Trump would be just as easy as learning the identity of the Jan 6 pipe bomber.


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GregTx
Professor Guide
1  seeder  GregTx    3 months ago

512

 
 
 
Trout Giggles
Professor Principal
1.1  Trout Giggles  replied to  GregTx @1    3 months ago

This is a good one, Greg. And...nice ass

 
 
 
MrFrost
Professor Guide
2  MrFrost    3 months ago

We all know Don Jr. left the cocaine in the WH. And speaking of Don Jr. Donald Trump said yesterday that Don Jr. has a great wife.....

One problem...

Don Jr. isn't married. 

 
 
 
Drinker of the Wry
Senior Expert
2.1  Drinker of the Wry  replied to  MrFrost @2    3 months ago
We all know Don Jr. left the cocaine in the WH.
Exactly, Hunter used crack.
 
 
 
Texan1211
Professor Principal
2.2  Texan1211  replied to  MrFrost @2    3 months ago
We all know Don Jr. left the cocaine in the WH.

We??????

Wouldn't have crackhead Hunter found it much, much sooner then?

 
 
 
Hal A. Lujah
Professor Guide
3  Hal A. Lujah    3 months ago

The smart money says both culprits were Republican.

 
 
 
Texan1211
Professor Principal
3.1  Texan1211  replied to  Hal A. Lujah @3    3 months ago
The smart money says both culprits were Republican.

people who would make that bet never had any smart money.

 
 
 
Hal A. Lujah
Professor Guide
3.1.1  Hal A. Lujah  replied to  Texan1211 @3.1    3 months ago

What would you know about smart anything?

 
 
 
Texan1211
Professor Principal
3.1.2  Texan1211  replied to  Hal A. Lujah @3.1.1    3 months ago
What would you know about smart anything?

A whole hell of a lot more than people making stupid bets!

 
 
 
charger 383
Professor Silent
4  charger 383    3 months ago

Thread 3 is locked to keep things from getting worse

 
 
 
Trout Giggles
Professor Principal
4.1  Trout Giggles  replied to  charger 383 @4    3 months ago

Aww it was just gettin' good!

 
 
 
Ronin2
Professor Quiet
5  Ronin2    3 months ago

The FBI should have the 'intelligence' removed from it's name and changed to 'incompetence'.

These are the same idiots that can't figure out who stole and released the Supreme Court's overturning of Roe V Wade off of a closed computer system.

These are the same idiots that can't figure out how cocaine got into one of the most secure areas of the White House. (If as some claim it is Don Jr's; then it sat there for over 3 damn years!) If it is not then someone who knew how to get past all of the security systems and personnel patrolling the area put it there. Sorry for those wanting to blame Trump- he and his administration were scrubbed from having that type of access. Then it comes out that this even the first occurrence since Biden took office of drugs being found at the WH. There is incompetent, and then there is being criminally incompetent.

Maybe they need to spend less time hunting down every last person that was even near DC on Jan 6th; harassing parents taking an interest in their children's education; and manufacturing bullshit against Trump- and more time concentrating on doing what is supposed to be their jobs- securing the president and DC; counter intelligence; and tracking down real criminals.

 
 
 
Trout Giggles
Professor Principal
6  Trout Giggles    3 months ago

For reals, this was actually funny

 
 
 
Mark in Wyoming
Professor Silent
6.1  Mark in Wyoming   replied to  Trout Giggles @6    3 months ago

They need to hire rev Jim from Taxi .

Jim:  takes sample , sniffs , gives scientific name for cocaine , states it came from bolivia , the eastern slope of a mountain in a specific region , during a drought year  with specific ground conditions and fertilizer standards , gives a specific year range between x and y .

If they can determine the vintage year , they can figure out which admin it came from from clinton on up to present .

I hope that was funny .

 you just saw the same bit when he did it with spiked/ laced cookies on the show  in your mind .

 
 
 
Trout Giggles
Professor Principal
6.1.1  Trout Giggles  replied to  Mark in Wyoming @6.1    3 months ago

It was funny. I always liked Jim

 
 

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