The New and Improved Newstalkers Will Debut Feburary 1st. Details Below.
It has come to my attention that there is some dispute on NT, regarding how arguments are to be settled. Civil, uncivil, or somewhere in between.
After long deliberations the ''Chiefs'' has come up with this wonderful solution. Everyone should be happy with it.
Jousting and Dueling will be introduced to Newstalkers on, drum roll please, Feburary 1st, 2014.
Yes folks, the old time ''disagreement settlers''are back.
There will be a few rules that I must explain to the you.
If you sign up for Jousting as a solution.
1. You must know how to ride, saddles optional.
2. Body armor is optional, though highly recommended.
3. You will draw straws with your opponent for choice of lances. (this is to avoid someone bringing a titanium lance, or the old, fool you, gun in the lance trick).
4. Chiefs decision as to the winner is final.
If you choose Dueling
1. No auto, semi-auto weapons, orflame throwers allowed.
2. mussel (I know itis mis-spelled, this is NT after all)loading firearms only.
3. You may bring your own ''Second''. It is recommended by the Chiefs that you bring a ''Third'' as well. (shots do go astray)
4. Last man or women standing is declared the winner.
Both Jousting and Dueling will be bi-partisan, bi-lateral, bi-lingual and bifurcated.
This being an equal opportunity site. Matches can be male vs female, female vs male, or any combination taken from the aforementioned.
To those of you, who wish to join in, these are photos of what we are talking about.
Jousting
Dueling
Dueling II
I feel with this addition feature, that Newstalkers has reached new heights. No other site will have this feature, thus, by default, we will be Number 1.
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It's true members. Leave it to Newstalker to push the envelope.
ROTFL, I love that scene.
Oh no, a request to change the rules already. NO rapiers, simatars are ok, but you still have to be on horseback Justice.
LMAO, a wonderful lesson I might add..
Mike, you have to put that sword down. Lances only.
Dammit Mike, that's a crossbow, not allowed.
As a concession, crossbows will be allowed, arrows will not be allowed.
You're becoming a pain in the ass Justice.
Ok, here is your horse.
[Perrie does a spit take]
There is no 2nd amendment on NT. In fact, there are no amendments at all. This place is perfect, why would you need amendments Justice?
Further disruption will results in the first Public Flogging on the new and improved NT.
Kavika hands Perrie a handkerchief...Not very lady like Perrie.
Hey! I wanna use words and a sharp wit! I'm too klutzy to use a javelin, or a gun, or a knife!
Heck I was pretty good with a flame thrower, too! Took away my best shot!
Bitey, words and sharp wit are not allowed. This rule is in place, to discourage those of a IQ larger than their shoe size to stay out of it.
This is manly stuff, well, and womanly stuff too. Survival of the fittest, back to the jungle. We don't need no stinkin sharp wit.
Tusla my friend, happy that you made it to the article. By my banningthe flame thrower, I'm trying to avoid the scorched earth policy so many like to follow.
tzia, it will only be allowed if you choose to use ''Door Number Three'', that is the Dueling Banjos alternative.
Although I would recommend a guitar pick instead.
Sure but have you ever roasted a hot dog that way? Yummy. You put the hot dog at the end of a stick, put your hand way out and blast away. Good for trimming your nails too!
Tsula, Wiki my mini doxie, read your comment and she is irate. Roasting a Hot Dog!!!!!
She is rounding up all the Hot Dogs in the neighborhood and heading to Florida..
You in big trouble Tsula.
Do you have a relish at the house...
tzia pacing back andforth trying to decide what to do . . .
Bad choice of words. Tell Wiki that I meant to say Weiner and see what happens. If she still wants to come to Floriduh tell her to bring her snuggies!
Oh no Tsula, her full name is ''Wiki the Warrior Wonder Weiner''..I can't let her see your post. hahahahahaha
I prefer jousting with guns:
Guitar picks are classified as dangerous weapons, don'tcha know?
Still gonna use my grenades - no need to get close or dirty.
OK, it seems that some are trying to skirt the CoC...Under the new rules of NT, this is not allowed.
The ''Founding Fathers/mothers'' have decided that the first offence will be punished by ''Public Flogging''.
After that, since we are a spiritual group. Skin Walkers and/or Shape Shifter will be sent to your home to deal with it. You DON'T want that to happen.
Just as an offhand opinion from the peanut gallery (hey, can I hire Howdy Doody as my stand in?), you would have to change your screen name to Super Pirate and obtain written (and notarized) permission, in sixteen copies, from Johnny Depp.
You mean ''Tonto'' don't you TTGA?
Well, then, phooey! My wit has been dulled and offended and my words are on strike. Hmmph!
Bad words! Bad!
ROTFL, be a nice girl now Bitey.
Can't we all just get along?
I want to use this one
Ah ha, sneaky Palma..I like it.
Sure I'm easy like Sunday Morning.
My theme song.
it would be even better if those were stiletto heels - a weapon on itself
I love that song..Wait, I can't agree...I hate that song...
My Bride says that they look like they would just fit her, too!
Stiletto heels, Indian style.
Who, moi? Nice? Surely, you jest! Me nice. Now I have the giggle-fits! Me. Nice. Yeeee-haaawwww!!!!!!
''Now I have giggle-fits'' what a visual that is Bitey...LOLOLOL
He got those from catching all those bigass bass.
Damnnnnnn BF, looks like you lived in the stone age for some time....
If laughter is good for the soul, just imagine what a good ol' giggle-fit would do...
Make us all children again?
Sounds like a plan!!
Again? I thought that is what we are right now!
I was an adult once bitey. I didn't like it, so I went back to being a child. True story, really.
I believe you. I have been true to my motto: "When I grow up, I'm gonna be a kid." I grew up 70 years ago. Been a kid all that time!
I'm going with the full tilt jousting. I used to be decent on a cutting horse. Guessing I might want a Percheron for jousting though.
A much better choice Steve.
The Big Chief doesn't spank people,(not that I'm aware of).
Get on your rocking horse, and prepare to challenge your nemesis. (who ever that my be).
Man up Justice.
me like it
Good morning Royal. Yes, I liked that feature, rarely used it, but it was handy with assholes.
I hope that we do get it here.
I don't thing the ning platform supports an ignore function.
OK Mac, is these some sort of trick?...''thing the ning''
typo!
Sorry.
I don't think the nink platform supports an inkore finkction.
How 'dat?
dat's OK.
Here is your weapon of choice. Noodles, good luck.
Noodles? Really? They'd better be wet, then! Have you ever tried 20 lashes with a DRY noodle? Well... have you? Noodles. Really. And my sharp wit was vetoed. Hmph!
Jungle??? I would say more like a Playground!
Here is your new weapon bitey.
Jungle!!! what jungle, it might be a ''Jungle Jim''.
Oh, I LOVE my new weapon!!!! LOVE IT!!!!!