Ya think???? 1. A bicycle can't stand alone because it is two-tired. 2. What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead giveaway.) 3. Time flies like an arrow Fruit flies like a banana. 4. A backward poet writes inverse. 5. In a democracy, it's your vote that counts; In feudalism, it's your count that votes. 6. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion. 7. If you don't pay your exorcist you get repossessed. 8. With her marriage she got a new name and a dress. 9. Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft and I'll show you A-flat minor. 10. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds. 11. The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered. 12. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart. 13. You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it. 14. Local Area Network in Australia: the LAN down under. 15. He often broke into song because he couldn't find the key. 16. Every calendar's days are numbered. 17. A lot of money is tainted. 'Taint yours and 'taint mine. 18. A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat. 19. He had a photographic memory that was never developed. 20. A plateau is a high form of flattery. 21. The short fortuneteller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large. 22. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end. 23. When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall. 24. Those who jump off a Paris bridge are in Seine. 25. When an actress saw her first strands of gray hair she thought she'd dye. 26. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis. 27. Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses. 28. Acupuncture is a jab well done. 29. Marathon runners with bad footwear suffer the agony of defeat
LOL, some good ones in there.
These are pretty much all winners ! Thanks for posting this ...
OK , the punniness after-effect has finally hit me . GROAN!
Ya think????
1. A bicycle can't stand alone because it is two-tired.
2. What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead giveaway.)
3. Time flies like an arrow Fruit flies like a banana.
4. A backward poet writes inverse.
5. In a democracy, it's your vote that counts; In feudalism, it's your count that votes.
6. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
7. If you don't pay your exorcist you get repossessed.
8. With her marriage she got a new name and a dress.
9. Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft and I'll show you A-flat minor.
10. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.
11. The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.
12. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.
13. You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.
14. Local Area Network in Australia: the LAN down under.
15. He often broke into song because he couldn't find the key.
16. Every calendar's days are numbered.
17. A lot of money is tainted. 'Taint yours and 'taint mine.
18. A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.
19. He had a photographic memory that was never developed.
20. A plateau is a high form of flattery.
21. The short fortuneteller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
22. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.
23. When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.
24. Those who jump off a Paris bridge are in Seine.
25. When an actress saw her first strands of gray hair she thought she'd dye.
26. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.
27. Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.
28. Acupuncture is a jab well done.
29. Marathon runners with bad footwear suffer the agony of defeat
Early morning wakeruppers
Wish I could remember a shorter version of the "The piano tuner tunes but once".
good ones
you did wake me up
I met a seal who worked for the circus. I asked if he made good money, but he said he just did it for the halibut.