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Military Refuses to Participate in Trump’s Parade, Citing Bone Spurs

  

Category:  The Lighter Side/ Humor

Via:  bob-nelson  •  6 years ago  •  15 comments

Military Refuses to Participate in Trump’s Parade, Citing Bone Spurs

S E E D E D   C O N T E N T



BorowitzMilitaryRefusestoParticipateinTrumpsParade1.jpg The Pentagon has turned down Donald J. Trump’s request for a grand military parade in Washington, D.C., citing a sudden outbreak of bone spurs that would prevent men and women in uniform from participating.

Harland Dorrinson, a Pentagon spokesman, said that, within an hour of Trump’s request, more than a hundred thousand military personnel complained that they were suffering from acute cases of bone spurs that would make marching in such a parade a painful ordeal.

“In the history of the U.S. military, we have never experienced a bone-spur epidemic of this magnitude,” the spokesman said. “Regrettably, however, we have no choice but to issue thousands of deferments.”

A statement from the bone-spur sufferers said that they would continue to valiantly serve their country around the world in a non-marching capacity, and offered an alternative to their participation in Trump’s proposed pageant.

“President Trump is welcome to march in the parade all by himself if he would finally like to enlist,” the statement read.


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Bob Nelson
Professor Guide
1  seeder  Bob Nelson    6 years ago

Bone spurs are terrible things!

 
 
 
nightwalker
Sophomore Silent
1.2  nightwalker  replied to  Bob Nelson @1    6 years ago

Hey, don't be knocking bone spurs, when trump starts WWIII I'm planning on growing some, along with some other chronic conditions as soon as I think of them.

Winking 2

 
 
 
Krishna
Professor Expert
2  Krishna    6 years ago

Actually all this stuff about Trump's is just anti-Trump propaganda from the fake news media. The fact is he served honorably in the military, and in fact people are saying that Trump  singlehandedly was responsble  for the U.S. winning a recent war while he served in the military!

 
 
 
Krishna
Professor Expert
2.1  Krishna  replied to  Krishna @2    6 years ago
 
 
 
Bob Nelson
Professor Guide
2.1.1  seeder  Bob Nelson  replied to  Krishna @2.1    6 years ago

That would be funny if it wasn't so perfectly applicable...

 
 
 
Krishna
Professor Expert
2.1.2  Krishna  replied to  Krishna @2.1    6 years ago

Related:

Rudy Giuliani: "Truth isn't Truth"

Rudy Giuliani on Sunday gave another eyebrow-raising TV interview, telling NBC’s Chuck Todd he’s concerned about special counsel Robert Mueller interviewing President Donald Trump because the “truth isn’t the truth.”

“Look, I’m not going to be rushed into having [Trump] testify so that he gets trapped into perjury,” Giuliani told Todd. “When you tell me that ... he should testify because he’s going to tell the truth and he shouldn’t worry. Well, that’s so silly, because it’s somebody’s version of the truth ― not the truth.”

Todd, visibly perplexed, interrupted: “Truth is truth.” But Giuliani frantically fired back, prompting laughter from Todd.

″No it isn’t! Truth isn’t truth!” Giuliani responded. “The president of the United States says, ‘I didn’t ―’”

“Trump says, ‘I didn’t tell him.’ And the other guy says that he did say it,” Giuliani said Sunday. “Which is the truth?”

Remember:

War is Peace

Freedom is Slavery

Ignorance is Bliss!

 
 
 
Kavika
Professor Principal
3  Kavika     6 years ago

trump-clap-parade.png

 
 
 
Paula Bartholomew
Professor Participates
3.1  Paula Bartholomew  replied to  Kavika @3    6 years ago

Maybe he should invite only those with STD's.  They come with their own clap.

 
 
 
Paula Bartholomew
Professor Participates
4  Paula Bartholomew    6 years ago

sudden outbreak of bone spurs that would prevent men and women in uniform from participating

I love it!

 
 
 
Cerenkov
Professor Silent
5  Cerenkov    6 years ago

Deleted

 
 
 
Ender
Professor Principal
6  Ender    6 years ago

What I thought was funny is they raised military spending and say that they will rebuild the military.

It seems to me that all the new funding would just have been used for a parade.

 
 
 
MrFrost
Professor Guide
7  MrFrost    6 years ago

988f6c56d90a954202c9a1a91429c2c4trumpmemefunnypoliticalmemes.jpg

 
 
 
Cerenkov
Professor Silent
7.1  Cerenkov  replied to  MrFrost @7    6 years ago

Should he have snuck into the military when they rejected him? Typical liberal idiocy.

 
 
 
MrFrost
Professor Guide
8  MrFrost    6 years ago

244lfx.jpg

 
 

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