Why I am a Trump Supporter! Iam Stupid!
Category: News & PoliticsVia: eat-the-press-do-not-read-it • last year • 20 comments
Folks always ask me, "Why are you a Trump supporter, Stupid?"
And, I never know exactly how to respond because, I am stupid, and, proud of it. So, I just punch them in the face, which they seem to savor. I would kick them in the groin, but, I am not a sexual pervert, that way.
However, when reality sat and the cost of the "fines for disorderly conduct" became too expensive to pay on my Taco Bell job, the Conservative side of me pea-brain, the RIGHT SIDE, kicked-in with a wallop, which I enjoyed very much. I am perverted, like that!
"Hey, Maroon", it said to me, "why don't you produced a video to share with your fellow Maroons?"
So, I did! Here is the fruit of my loin. Watch -But, Do Not Touch!
(For the Best Results, View the link in the privacy of your home. It is copied, for your convenience, and my stupidity, in the "comment section" of this Master Piece. That link works, I am told, works).
This one, I, also have been angrily told, "does not work you, POS"! ( OVER AND OVER AGAIN, AND AGAIN).Which I find refreshing.
People should be direct with each other. There is entirely too much "civilized talk" in the world. No one really knows what anyone is saying, anymore, due to "politeness".
As a result of a congenital defect (birth) I am unable to follow directions, read well, or, embed my "illustrious" creations properly.
So, I must do it this way, until things change, which, I seriously doubt will ever happen. At my age, 77.6.18 days, I do not see that any longer as a "real possibility." Do You?
I am headed on a "fast train" in the other direction.
The above is a self-composed excuse for not knowing, "Why I am a Trump Supporter"! It has more to do with the "free" wine, that Trump supplies me than, any ideological views that I may have espoused before I became a "Urine Soaked Wino", par excellence!
As all of you know, Trump, the "Stable Genius", owns a Vineyard, named, of course, Trump Whines, (it is a "play on words") and, is reportedly being misused to grow his "wino constituents" to extraordinary lengths.
Unlike, that drunk Supreme Court Justice, Brett Kavanaugh, I like "Wine", not beer. I have a higher standard. Especially, if it is free!
In D.C., every homeless, street-bum knows that "the Donald" is not shy about using the "Grape" to entice voters to break the law, vote for him, and/or beat up his "opponents supporters", as I have done, many, many times.(750 to be exact).
Wine is an effective recruitment tool if one's wishes to reach my "demographic"; wasted winos, deadbeats, and, drunken "deplorables" to slosh to return home, after a "Rip Roaring Night of "Baptizing Whores".
As a homeless bum, a card-carrying Republican Part Ward Boss, and, an upright, righteous "Conservative Christian with a Thirst For Liberal Blood", I might add, I have never missed an opportunity to show up at one of Trump's "Rallies In The Alley", to get me payoff. I am the one seated next to C.B.! The one in rags. You can readily recognize me in many of Trump's promotional videos.
I mean, for real, why else would anyone support Trump? He's Nuts! There has to be a "payoff", even I know that! Don't you?
Don't respond, now, save it for the "Comment Section". I am on a roll!
I hope you enjoy the video. It is self-explanatory, short, 2.5 minutes in duration, and, has received over 77,000 views on Facebook by my Legion of Unwashed Fans! (Very dirty people), with two shares, and, one "like". I lick it like that.
YouTube, or, as I call them, "no energy tire-tube , will not allow it to air because they claim, it is "too tame, not enough, blood, guts, profanity or nudity" for their pristine standards.
Therefore, I am expanding my audience by providing this video "opus" to you lucky folks, at no additional cost. Of, course, if you want to send me money, or, your panties, I will take them. Thank you, very much.
As most of you know, I am a Certified Moron, in good standing with my fellow morons, card-carrying member of the Heritage Foundation, a "Think Tank for Conservatives with Low I.Q.s".
Again, I must confess, that I don't know how to embed this "life-changing video", despite multiple suggestions from well-meaning folks, here, on The News Talkers.
I barely learned to save them on FB. Neither, have I mastered the technique to upload them to YouTube, because, my "Tire Pump" does not go all the way up.
Would it help if I showed you my "Authentication Papers"?
I undertook this project, courtesy of a generous gift, a Promissory Note", from the Trump Foundation, which after two years, I have, yet, to receive a dime, due, I am told by Ivanka "to a snafu".
If it is her "Snafu", I am OK with that. She looks like she has one sin-sational "snafu".
Nor, sad to say, has my crate of Trump's Cheapo Azz Burning, Red Wine For Winos , arrived, as of this post. I continue to believe that if Trump is re-elected in 2020, it will come with a big Red, White & Blue bow tied in a knot on it.
Whenever, I call the Trump Foundation, the automated answering service, Melania Trump, tells me, in that seductive Russian, manly voice of hers, that they are "temporarily out of business", but, "after the election, the looting will start all over, again".
Melania is so "sweet and sexy and a woman, too", she, always, concluded our phone conversation with, "Be Best, Sucker" (her pet name for me) then, hangs up, forcefully.
It makes me "hot, too," even sends "chills" down my spine to my "Willy-Wonka".
"Why", I asked a thousand times, "does the 'Deep State' harass GOD's Appointed Christian President, Mister Trump? Can't they attack Hillary? Trump just wants to do his job. His job is golfing!"
I have heard it said, by those in the know, that it is "because Trump is a famous Reality TV Star who can, and does, grab women by their pus*y", which his detractors can't do".
"Jealousy is the real root of all Evil, especially, when men are talking about their roots, which, if we are HONEST, is pretty much what we do, most of the time." - DJ Trump
Mister Sex Siren, "the Donald" Trump, will now be seen daily, on Serious Radio , with his old buddy, the "Sexually Disturbed" HOWARD STERN, who prefers to grabbing women by the throat rather than the pussy. To each his own!
"Trump is a good man? He just wants to do his job. His job is golfing." (Needs repeating).
It is obvious that the Trump Foundations, The Trump Organization, as well as all of the Illegal Activities of the Trump Family, have been targeted by the "Deep, Dirty State of Liberals, Communists, and, Pinkos run by Nancy Pelosi.
Nancy has long been known to illegally use her office in the House of Representatives for nefarious purposes, like passing legislation that helps people, and, not Trump, according to our non-vetted "sauces", Steve Bunion, the disgraced former Wino-In he-Whitehouse, a soon to be released made for Mad TV Network Movie Channel.
Please, I beg you, fellow Trump Supporters, tie someone, you love to a chair, and, force them to watch this breathtaking, insightful video.
They will love you for it, more likely, than not! Political deviates get turned on by "rough behavior in the bedroom," which is another helpful hint we provide to you, at no additional cost.
Oh, well, "life is not fair," according to Jimmy Carter, whoever the Hell, he is.
Here is the link, again. Good Luck! I am told it doesn't work either. "To self-promoting. I am promoting Trump, not meself.
I hope you enjoy it as much as I did making it. If you like it, send cash.
Please, enough already, with the "returnable bottles". I can't cash them it. I can't write.
Sorry, folks, I must go. My doctors are calling!
Remember, my reputation is on the line, not yours. Be precise, pithy in your comments, and, remember to return them, ASAP!