Bloomberg Editorial Board Endorses Mike Bloomberg
NEW YORK, NY—The Bloomberg News Editorial Board has endorsed Mike Bloomberg for president.
While other publications are endorsing multiple candidates or communists, Bloomberg Opinion says they've found the right man for the job: Mike Bloomberg.
"He's a really swell guy," wrote the editorial team. "We always have a good time when good ol' Mike is around. His ideas are great, dogs and children love him, and honestly, it's our completely unbiased opinion that he's just the #1 man for the job. Vote Mike Bloomberg!"
The team listed some of his greatest accomplishments:
A record score of 18 on the golf course
Learning to drive before he was four years old
Graduating with several doctorate degrees by the time he turned 16
Advocating for minorities and civil rights
Bringing police officers and black people together
Eradicating soda drinking from the galaxy
Planting an entire 400-acre cornfield with his bare hands
Winning World War I
Winning World War II
Winning World War III (all but guaranteed to happen)
Taming a wild bull and teaching it to speak Farsi
"Oh yeah, and he's absolutely human and definitely not a robot."
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Vote for Mini Mike if you still need a baby sitter.
I was just about to post the same meme..........LOL
Instead, I am sure this may come up tonight.............
Ha, I have a similar to that one.
What a shocking and udderly surprising action they took. Bloomberg endorsing himself...
Well it's satire but I'm sure they do.
Did anyone hear about his proposed health savings, education, and retirement tax the other day?
Deny old retirees healthcare and let them die? Yeah I'll be posting that later.
I'm looking forward to watching the first-ever unfiltered Mike Bloomberg defend himself tonight without his multi-million dollar Madison Avenue scripted teleprompter.
Will the socialist moderators and competitors push hard?
The DNC is throwing Bernie under the bus again - what will he say about his Fortune 500 investment portfolio? Will anyone ask about what he and his wife did?
Will Joe Biden be able to string together two coherent sentences and stay awake?
Hopefully it's livelier than the previous ones with their oh gosh and shucks intercourse.
I'm thinking Bernie is going to go hard on Bloomberg, I wonder if they will give sleepy Joe front and center again, by all rights it should be Bernie and Pete.
It really warms my heart to see how dedicated my republican friends are about Bernie. I can't imagine why/ sarc.
Who is endorsing Bernie and who is a Republican?
It is interesting to see how offended people get when any criticism of Bloomberg is posted.
LOL, ANY? It has been non stop since he got into this election while only the conservatives and the extreme left cry for Bernie. And again, nowhere did I say endorse. And who is a republican.. gee I'm not sure. But I bet there are a few on this article.
Pretty obvious, even Trump supporters are sensing Trumps' fear in the air, as Bloomberg is in their heads, and Hillary and Obama are suddenly 2nd and third 1/2 cheek tears
thought torn from the first tier of a term of N Deer meant 4 sum planted and conceited to pro germinate till bangin beakers knocks off her sox n sneakers Conversely high topped while flat chested tired irony outfits a shoe flown into a circular sawn in ha;f pie eyed sauced red by the illiterate, till figured oh sew well
stitched in time
out.
like me in and on the corner of the round house on the circle where i open corner bars without a combination of Florida Keys on the Black Ivory coast to stop
Abruptly!
sorry, i'm board without water
N WHISKEY!
It'll look like a dog-run when the snow melts - bones and shit everywhere.