Harris Tells Trump She Cannot Send Him Birth Certificate Without Postal Service | The New Yorker
Here we go again. May the best woman win...
By Andy Borowitz
August 17, 2020 Photograph by Carlos Barria / Reuters
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—An apologetic Kamala Harris told Donald J. Trump on Monday that she will be unable to provide him with a certified copy of her birth certificate in the absence of a fully functioning postal service.
"In order to obtain a copy of my birth certificate, I have to send a letter to the California Department of Public Health," she said. "That is really tricky to do without a mailbox."
If the C.D.P.H. somehow receives her letter, Senator Harris said, "it will then have to mail my birth certificate back to me—again, a difficult task if there is no mail."
Harris informed Trump that, if by some miracle she were to receive her birth certificate in the mail, "I would then have to mail it to you. Again, not easy."
The senator said that she was "deeply sorry" that the United States Postal Service's funding problems would make getting her birth certificate to Trump so challenging.
"I know that the question of my birth has been a cause of great distress to you," she said. "I would do anything to ease your mind about this issue."
She concluded her letter by saying that she was unsure whether her letter would ever arrive.
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Senator Harris is going to hurt Mike Pence. She is a winner!
Mike Pence is meat on the table...... Get him a toe-tag now.
I like it. I find it amusing.
It's a dastardly lie that the Postal drop off boxes have been taken out of service - well - moved yes.
But they are still in service.
They have all been moved to Silver City Iowa .
Annual pick up time 4:00 PM February 8 except when the 8th is a Sunday.
Interestingly, the Postmaster General (Trump bankroller, transport company stockholder) has now said that his "reforms" will be delayed until after the election.
I'm surprised. I thought they'd decided to go for it all, devil take the hindmost.
Being vigilant...