Biden Administration Mounts Daring Mission To Evacuate Hunter's Remaining Cash From Ukraine | The Babylon Bee
Category: Satire
Via: just-jim-nc-ttth • 2 years ago • 5 commentsBy: Comedian Who Gets High And Talks About (The Babylon Bee)
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Biden Administration Mounts Daring Mission To Evacuate Hunter's Remaining Cash From Ukraine Politics January 24th, 2022 - BabylonBee.com
UKRAINE—As Russian troops assemble at Ukraine's border ahead of a possible land invasion, President Biden has taken swift action by deploying an elite seal team to evacuate his son Hunter's money.
"At my direction, military operatives infiltrated a bank to evacuate my son's stash of sweet, sweet Burisma cash before Russia murdered everyone. I didn't want to risk that money falling into the wrong hands," said Biden in a statement to congress. "Unfortunately, we haven't been able to evacuate Americans from the country because I put all our resources on this operation. But make no mistake, we will leave no dollar behind."
The four-man squad was dropped into ally territory by a Black Hawk helicopter outfitted for stealth missions. Once on the ground, they covertly asked for directions to the nearest bank and shared an Uber to make the 4-mile journey.
Bank security footage depicts the squad calmly entering the bank and asking for the manager. The squad then assembled in a tiny cubicle to discuss closing the account. In the end, the soldiers strategically left the building with a giant cargo net filled with millions of U.S. dollars.
General Mark Milley called the operation an "unprecedented success" and noted that the "bazillions of dollars" were safely back in the U.S. where they could be used to boost the failing narcotics economy.
At publishing time, Biden's approval rating has dropped another five points.
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There will be a happy camper or two tonight. LET THE BLOW, FLOW! LOL
HOOKERS AND BLOW FOR EVERYBODY!!!!!!!
Joepedo needs Russia to clean up his corruption for him. If that doesn't work they will send in Kamala to blow the right people.
Donnie Jr. intercepted the blow and his sidekick, Crystal Nose is so happy she's handing out lap dances.