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FBI Sent Itemized Bill For 12-Hour Stay At Mar-A-Lago

  

Category:  Satire

Via:  gregtx  •  2 years ago  •  19 comments

FBI Sent Itemized Bill For 12-Hour Stay At Mar-A-Lago
PALM BEACH, FLORIDA—Faxing the government agency a detailed invoice days after a raid at the property, a Mar-A-Lago front desk employee reportedly sent the FBI an itemized bill Friday for their 12-hour stay at the resort. "Thank you for visiting Mar-A-Lago, please find an itemized invoice of your expenses attached,"…

S E E D E D   C O N T E N T


PALM BEACH, FLORIDA—Faxing the government agency a detailed invoice days after a raid at the property, a Mar-A-Lago front desk employee reportedly sent the FBI an itemized bill Friday for their 12-hour stay at the resort. "Thank you for visiting Mar-A-Lago, please find an itemized invoice of your expenses attached," said guest services agent Marie Burns, following up with a courtesy call to the FBI to confirm receipt of the more than $4,500 outstanding bill, which she reminded them must be paid within 72 hours or become subject to a 25% penalty fee every day it went unpaid. "As you can see, failing to vacate the room you were occupying before our standard 11 a.m. checkout time resulted in a second full-night charge of $2,000, as our records indicate you remained on the premises until 8 p.m., with several members of your party milling about the golf course and club on their breaks without purchasing a visitor's pass—valued at $350 for the day or a yearly membership of $14,000. Plus, you'll notice a resort fee of $50 per extra person in the room beyond two adults, and our daily parking rate for the 20 armored vehicles you left with our valets. And we did have to double the cleaning fee, seeing as you all left quite the mess of boxes and papers behind. If you'd like to dispute any of these charges, you'll have to take them up with your personal financial institution, which in your case would be Congress." Burns went on to explain that since she didn't know how to charge the agency for the documents they removed from the property, that would show up on the bill as "stolen towels."


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GregTx
Professor Guide
1  seeder  GregTx    2 years ago

384

 
 
 
bbl-1
Professor Quiet
1.1  bbl-1  replied to  GregTx @1    2 years ago

What is the point of this?  Why would you waste our time on such a frivolous endeavor?

 
 
 
GregTx
Professor Guide
1.1.1  seeder  GregTx  replied to  bbl-1 @1.1    2 years ago

You do realize this is an open forum right? If you feel you're wasting your time, move along...

 
 
 
bbl-1
Professor Quiet
1.1.2  bbl-1  replied to  GregTx @1.1.1    2 years ago

Answer the question.

 
 
 
GregTx
Professor Guide
1.1.3  seeder  GregTx  replied to  bbl-1 @1.1.2    2 years ago

Sure, fuck off, does that make it easier to trot along?

 
 
 
bbl-1
Professor Quiet
1.1.4  bbl-1  replied to  GregTx @1.1.3    2 years ago

Can't do it, can you?

 
 
 
GregTx
Professor Guide
1.1.5  seeder  GregTx  replied to  bbl-1 @1.1.4    2 years ago

Can't do what?

 
 
 
squiggy
Junior Silent
1.1.6  squiggy  replied to  bbl-1 @1.1    2 years ago

[deleted]

 
 
 
Just Jim NC TttH
Professor Principal
1.1.7  Just Jim NC TttH  replied to  bbl-1 @1.1    2 years ago

[deleted]

 
 
 
Sparty On
Professor Principal
2  Sparty On    2 years ago

Furthermore they defended wearing full battle rattle to the raid.    An unspecified source stated, those bus boys have knives, forks and spoons and we hear they are dynamite! 

 
 
 
GregTx
Professor Guide
3  seeder  GregTx    2 years ago

[Deleted]

 
 
 
GregTx
Professor Guide
4  seeder  GregTx    2 years ago

[deleted]

 
 
 
squiggy
Junior Silent
5  squiggy    2 years ago

Well, this surely was a waste of time.

 
 
 
Jeremy Retired in NC
Professor Expert
5.1  Jeremy Retired in NC  replied to  squiggy @5    2 years ago
Well, this surely was a waste of time

And yet here you are.

 
 
 
squiggy
Junior Silent
5.1.1  squiggy  replied to  Jeremy Retired in NC @5.1    2 years ago

Look at the wreckage - you missed the fun.

 
 

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