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Biden Shows Off New Electric Car That Can Hold Over 17 Boxes Of Classified Documents

  

Category:  Satire

Via:  gregtx  •  last year  •  12 comments

Biden Shows Off New Electric Car That Can Hold Over 17 Boxes Of Classified Documents
WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Biden took to the streets of D.C. today to promote a brand new electric car, capable of holding at least seventeen boxes of highly-classified documents.

S E E D E D   C O N T E N T



WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Biden took to the streets of D.C. today to promote a brand new electric car, capable of holding at least seventeen boxes of highly-classified documents.

"I can get all of these top-secret files to my beach house on a single charge! Not a joke!" said Biden, cruising up Pennsylvania Avenue. "Wait, weren't there eighteen boxes? Eh, who cares. Who wants ice cream??"

President Biden drove the car as part of his climate initiative, hoping to encourage everyday Americans to purchase $100,000 electric vehicles. "While no one can afford the electric car President Biden was driving, which happens to be awful for the environment, he really wanted room for all the boxes," said Chief of Staff Ronald Klain. "We also were hoping to highlight that Americans can get a $7,500 tax credit for buying an electric car. However, we must clarify that the car Biden was driving isn't even eligible for the tax credit, and was selected exclusively for the number of file boxes it could lug around."

President Biden reportedly will take the car to Delaware this weekend to monitor while the FBI collects classified documents strewn about his beach home. "We did have to make a couple of special adjustments to the car before we hit the road," said Secret Service Agent Tom Rogers. "There's a steering wheel in the passenger seat for the agent who does the actual driving, but we did install a toy steering wheel in the driver's seat so Biden can pretend. We also had to remove all the USB ports, he's got this awful habit of trying to lick them. Don't ask me."

At publishing time, Secret Service had been forced to remove several classified documents from Biden's possession as he was attempting to feed them to the car as fuel.


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GregTx
PhD Guide
1  seeder  GregTx    last year

512

 
 
 
Ozzwald
Professor Quiet
3  Ozzwald    last year
Biden Shows Off New Electric Car That Can Hold Over 17 Boxes Of Classified Documents

Doing the math.  This means that Trump would have to buy over a dozen of them?

 
 
 
Ronin2
Professor Quiet
3.1  Ronin2  replied to  Ozzwald @3    last year

No, Trump would just buy a used M35, paint it gold, and call it good.

Brandon on the other hand is still clueless of how many other locations hold classified documents and how many. He will need to have 17 of those electric cars on back order.

 
 
 
Vic Eldred
Professor Principal
4  Vic Eldred    last year

There is no doubt about it....the BB is the only thing humorous we have these days.

 
 

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