╌>

Chicago Mayor Says That Due To Negative Connotations We Should Stop Using The Word 'Chicago'

  

Category:  Satire

Via:  gregtx  •  last year  •  22 comments

Chicago Mayor Says That Due To Negative Connotations We Should Stop Using The Word 'Chicago'
CHICAGO — Mayor Brandon Johnson advised Chicago reporters to stop using the word

S E E D E D   C O N T E N T


CHICAGO — Mayor Brandon Johnson advised Chicago reporters to stop using the word "Chicago" when describing anything that happens in Chicago because of all the negative connotations associated with Chicago.

"You can call it 'The Windy City' or 'Downtown Deep Dish' but do not, under any circumstances call it Chicago," said the mayor of Chicago. "That just wouldn't be appropriate."

The city formerly known as Chicago has been under particular strain of late due to large "mob-like" gatherings disrupting businesses with "loot-like" behavior. Mayor Brandon hopes that calling the city literally anything else will cause the problem to go away.

"There's history in this city. I don't want to be responsible for the birth of more 'baby Al Capones'," Brandon said. "Only by hiding our problems with inoffensive language can we truly overcome them."

"And you can put that quote on an inspirational calendar," he added.

At publishing time, the crime rate of the City-Which-Must-Not-Be-Named continued to rise for some reason.


Tags

jrDiscussion - desc
[]
 
GregTx
Professor Guide
1  seeder  GregTx    last year

512

 
 
 
JohnRussell
Professor Principal
2  JohnRussell    last year

Chicago has actually had a very successful summer. The giant music festival, Lollapalooza just ended yesterday and was attended by hundreds of thousands of people from around the world, who brought millions to the citys hotel and restaurant business. We also had the groundbreaking NASCAR street race through the streets of Grant Park a month ago. 

Chicago is far too big a place to be slowed down by sporadic , although persistent, violence which the right likes to exploit for political purposes. 

 
 
 
GregTx
Professor Guide
2.1  seeder  GregTx  replied to  JohnRussell @2    last year

Really? How are things in Deering, Englewood and C****** Lawn?...

 
 
 
GregTx
Professor Guide
2.1.2  seeder  GregTx  replied to  Texan1211 @2.1.1    last year
urging Mayor Brandon Johnson to sign an executive order declaring violence a public health crisis in the city.

512

That doesn't sound like a successful summer..... or perhaps someone's bar is set too low?

 
 
 
Drinker of the Wry
Senior Expert
2.1.4  Drinker of the Wry  replied to  Texan1211 @2.1.3    last year

Chicago crime isn’t that bad if you don’t include the murders.

 
 
 
Drinker of the Wry
Senior Expert
2.2  Drinker of the Wry  replied to  JohnRussell @2    last year

It's not so bad unless you are a Black woman there. 

In Chicago, Black women are around 16% of the population but:

  • are 25% of the crime victims
  • are 40% of the sexual assault victims
  • are 35% of assault victims
  • are 38% of battery victims
  • are 34% of kidnapping victims
  • are 50% of human trafficking victims
  • are 28% of motor theft victims

Black woman are easy targets in Chiraq.

 
 
 
Drinker of the Wry
Senior Expert
2.2.2  Drinker of the Wry  replied to  Texan1211 @2.2.1    last year

In the Upper Midwest, Black women get no respect.

 
 
 
Drinker of the Wry
Senior Expert
2.2.4  Drinker of the Wry  replied to  Texan1211 @2.2.3    last year

Maybe Brown people don't care about Black racism. 

 
 
 
JohnRussell
Professor Principal
3  JohnRussell    last year

There many cities that have worse crime statistics than Chicago, but dont have to listen to all this shit because they are littler fish. 

 
 
 
Drinker of the Wry
Senior Expert
3.2  Drinker of the Wry  replied to  JohnRussell @3    last year

Big fish eat little fish.

 
 
 
MrFrost
Professor Guide
4  MrFrost    last year

OOps...

 
 
 
GregTx
Professor Guide
4.1  seeder  GregTx  replied to  MrFrost @4    last year

Perhaps you have an answer for 2.1 then?....

 
 
 
MrFrost
Professor Guide
4.1.1  MrFrost  replied to  GregTx @4.1    last year

Just read the link... 

 
 
 
GregTx
Professor Guide
4.1.2  seeder  GregTx  replied to  MrFrost @4.1.1    last year

I did. Did you read the question?

 
 

Who is online





Gazoo


632 visitors