To Avoid Embarrassing Falls, Aides Will Now Transport Biden Using Presidential Hand Truck
S E E D E D C O N T E N T
WASHINGTON, D.C. — The White House announced a new directive Tuesday they say will put an end to President Joe Biden's endless pratfalls once and for all: transporting the leader of the free world on an official presidential hand truck.
"Whoa, look at me go!" Biden said excitedly as he was pushed up the tarmac to Air Force One. "I'm flying!"
The presidential hand truck was specially designed by the nation's top scientists and is reportedly able to withstand the blast of a nuclear bomb.
"This baby is made out of the same heavy-duty material as the space shuttle," said Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre as she introduced the stylish presidential hand truck, code-named Limp. "It's completely bulletproof and capable of speeds in excess of 5 miles per hour."
According to sources, Biden is impressed by the hand truck's ability to whisk him away from journalists who keep asking him annoying questions about his undeniable corruption.
"Whoosh!" Biden cried out on one such occasion. "Frender limbergrander, man! Weeeeeeeee!"
At publishing time, the president had honored the hand truck with a Presidential Medal of Freedom.
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I am pretty sure Trump had shit himself in that one .
You’ve had how long to come up with some twisted rebuttal and the best you can do is a clip of Trump walking? Good work.
Then do better, come up with a video of Trump running or riding a bike. We'll wait.
Got a better idea. We have two gentlemen, one is 77 the other is 80. Let us have both of them ride a bicycle for five miles on a general not difficult course. And see who does it better. The one who does would obviously be in better physical shape and that would answer many questions. Not that big of a deal. The only question would be if both of them would accept the task.
This is not satire.
Keeping Biden from falling or talking in an uncontrolled environment is the primary job of the White House staff.
he doesn’t actually govern, that’s for Obama and his acolytes.
Prove it.
Who is governing? Don’t tell me your silly enough to believe it’s the guy who can’t figure out how to exit stages.
Like I said, prove what you said.
Are you paid by Biden?
Are you paid by the FSB?
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everyday he’s in public, avoiding situations like this is the entire focus of the White House:
Biden took the stage at a UN event in violation of protocol without Brazilian President Lula, almost knocked down the Brazilian flag, and then forgot to shake hands with the Brazilian president. In Brazilian social networks, special attention is paid to Biden’s short run after the collision with the Brazilian flag.
That’s just a bullshit photoshop of Biden on that hand truck. You can’t be doing that without straps.
No doubt that's photoshopped. I'm sure there are straps on the real thing, and for some reason I'm thinking some kind of mask is involved although I would imagine a drool cup has been incorporated......