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"TRUMP IS SO POOR THAT" ---(fill in the blank an play the new game for families.

  

Category:  News & Politics

By:  eat-the-press-do-not-read-it  •  9 months ago  •  48 comments

"TRUMP IS SO POOR THAT" ---(fill in the blank an play the new game for families.
"LAUGHTER is the best medicine when drunk"! - Winos Anonymous

Great News, my beloved, bored, "News Slaker. commies"!

You will never again be bored if you swallow my advice, mouth wide open, like in your teen days at the funky, chunky, get-some-smooching, DIVE-IN movie, French kissing every pimpled-faced teenager in your car, regardless of "Race, Creed or Sex"!

Those were the days of fun, family unity, patriotism, and humping whoever one could in your jalopy.

Remember those days. Don't you wish you could go back to them?

Well, friends, you can.

Thanks to the Bird Droppings Institute (a Think/Stink Tank for MORONS, no idiots, please) who has created a new FAMILY BORED GAME, that will bring your dysfunctional, burnt-out family back to the Kitchen Table with glee.

This wondrous gift of familial vibes will do that for you when you play the new FAMILY GAME:

 "
TRUMP is so POOR that ..."!

Fill in the blanks with your creative, funky, TANGLED mind, and laugh and laugh with your family & friends, until one of them passes away from all of the laughter, which means that you inherit get a larger stake of the family assets.

Here, try it and see how much fun it is, how much laughter, and what WARMTH it brings to  "FAMILY AND FRIENDS".

Be creative, bring back that late 50's, early 60's aroma where men were men, and women worked at home, cooking, washing, cleaning the house, doing the dishes, and scrubbing the floor with "nary a frown of despair".

Today, folklorists, you can now time-jump back to the Glory Days of FAMILY with this new game.

This new, Bring the FAMILY Back Together, will turn every night into a fun night of "Good, Old Fashioned, American Families from "Those Good Old Days" of the 1950s, when the family played games, after supper, right after the dishes were done, and Dad was awakened from his drunk.

Trust me, friends, I wouldn't lie to you, and neither would "Dirty Diaper Donnie"!

We Donnie and I, Jonathan Livingston Pigeon-Poo, "Doctored", guarantee you and your siblings, divorced parents, adulteress and, sleepover drifters, that you are now, one once more...no more whores, druggies, degenerates, political anarchists, or "worst of all", SPITBALLERS at dinner time. 


My fellow, mellow News Stalkers, a free side benefit comes with this gift for ONLY $45 for 45 days, plus, a special bonus -this game automatically pisses off "Angry, Mean, Unpleasant MAGA-LOONS", at no additional cost.

Folks, this is your opportunity to bring your estranged family back into the family fold without bloodshed.

 It is a bargain at $45.00 per week (CASH ONLY), and you'll never have to go out for CHEAP entertainment, again.


Try it, you might lick it...er...like it! Just like Cocaine, it's ADDICTIVE!"


Fill in the Blanks, "Trump is so broke...", and you will be rolling on the kitchen floor, just like the old days, instead of "rolling drunks" for pocket cash.

It is cheaper and less harmful.




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Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
1  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It    9 months ago

I start:

"TRUMP IS SO POOR...He can't date his daughter! He dates her daughter!"

Now, was that so hard?  Come on, let it rip, you know you want to let it all hang out, jump up and shout.

Here is your change to UNCORK!

 
 
 
devangelical
Professor Principal
1.1  devangelical  replied to  Eat The Press Do Not Read It @1    9 months ago

trump is so poor, he's trying to sell the oval office to the highest foreign bidder before he takes possession.

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
1.1.1  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It  replied to  devangelical @1.1    9 months ago

That is FORWARD THINKING!

 
 
 
cjcold
Professor Quiet
1.2  cjcold  replied to  Eat The Press Do Not Read It @1    9 months ago

Trump is so poor that Melania now has to wear white cotton panties from Wal-Mart.

 
 
 
Drinker of the Wry
Senior Expert
1.2.1  Drinker of the Wry  replied to  cjcold @1.2    9 months ago

Do cotton panties upset you?

 
 
 
cjcold
Professor Quiet
1.2.2  cjcold  replied to  Drinker of the Wry @1.2.1    9 months ago
Do cotton panties upset you?

They actually turn me on. 

They remind of all of those cheerleaders I knew.

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
2  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It    9 months ago

TRUMP IS SO POOR...
"His Wipers Quit, now he has to do that chore manually. And, 'Donnie' is not man-you, at all. Under that ORANGE PAINT, he is a "Girlie Man".

T-Rump is a proverbial windbag, lacking the gymnastic skill to bend over backward, put his head between his thighs, and blow the candles out.

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
3  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It    9 months ago

TRUMP IS SO BROKE...

He is selling his own "Autographed, Used Depends" for $250, plus $250 for S/H, and $250 because you are a MORON.

 
 
 
JohnRussell
Professor Principal
4  JohnRussell    9 months ago

Trump is so poor he had to downscale his transportation methods. 

donald-trump-photoshop_650x400_61490426292.jpg

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
5  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It    9 months ago

Well, what the HELL are you waiting for?  The End of the World?

We are obligated to save America from Re-Tar-I-Don MAGA-LOONS.

There is no reason for STUPID to conquer our Nation! 

 
 
 
cjcold
Professor Quiet
5.1  cjcold  replied to  Eat The Press Do Not Read It @5    9 months ago

It's been happening since Murdoch created Fox.

 
 
 
Ozzwald
Professor Quiet
6  Ozzwald    9 months ago

TRUMP IS SO POOR THAT... he had to ask Stormy Daniels for a loan.

TRUMP IS SO POOR THAT...he has to buy generic Adderall.

TRUMP IS SO POOR THAT...he has to wash and reuse his Depends.

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
6.1  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It  replied to  Ozzwald @6    9 months ago

That is so good, Ozzwald. You are Dizzy.

 
 
 
JohnRussell
Professor Principal
7  JohnRussell    9 months ago

Trump is so poor he has to order McDonalds hamburgers without cheese. 

 
 
 
JohnRussell
Professor Principal
7.1  JohnRussell  replied to  JohnRussell @7    9 months ago

.....he has to buy his "sharpies" at the dollar store. 

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
8  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It    9 months ago

This just In!

CONGRESS passed (a few minutes ago) a BILL requiring #45 ("Dirty Diaper Donnie") and, mandating that for "The nation Health Safety", Donald J. (Stinky Butt) immediately install, ASAP, video cameras, listening devices, and large, sensitive ODOR DETECTORS in every restroom in Mar-A-LARD-Go Every Damn 20 minute Potties, or go "Straight to Hell"!

As an unpaid professional, I think it would be better if Donnie went straight to HELL for everyone's sake.

What say you, my Fellow Fuckardos?


 
 
 
cjcold
Professor Quiet
8.1  cjcold  replied to  Eat The Press Do Not Read It @8    9 months ago

Many would offer options but are afraid of NSA consequences.

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
9  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It    9 months ago

Please, don't send coded responses in Chinese or Pig Latin, I cannot for the life of me, decipher that SHAT!

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
10  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It    9 months ago

My scientific "sauces", Drs. Ding-A-Ling & Ding Dong theorized" that "TRUMP'S DUMPS" is having a degenerative effect on one sector of our society.

The venerable, easily led, naive, Right-Wing Christian Nationalist, known as "MAGA-LUNATICS".

Dirty Diaper Donnie's profusion odor, emanating from his DEPENDS is destroying minute brain cells, in the already "MINUTE" brain of MAGA-LOONY TUNES, interfering with their ability to think, reason, or spell.

Stay tuned in for MORE UPDATES from Eat The Press-Don't Read It. (We distort, others report).

Send MONEY, Honey. We can't grind out this SHAT for free!

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
11  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It    9 months ago

OK, I am closing out my bank account and sending it to Revenend Oral Fleece to help him continue to look out for others over help him re-ed-mud- KKK-ate MAGA LOONS!

Isn't that LOVERLY?

 
 
 
cjcold
Professor Quiet
11.1  cjcold  replied to  Eat The Press Do Not Read It @11    9 months ago

He'll appreciate a few more gallons of jet fuel for his Lear.

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
12  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It    9 months ago

Don't let this grant opportunity to turn your rude, spoil children into angels.

 
 
 
cjcold
Professor Quiet
12.1  cjcold  replied to  Eat The Press Do Not Read It @12    9 months ago

Just the ones who are sure that there is/are god/gods that should be worshipped and prayed to.

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
13  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It    9 months ago

If I could get a dime for every cuss word hurled at me from my readers I would be a Billionaire, too.

 
 
 
charger 383
Professor Silent
13.1  charger 383  replied to  Eat The Press Do Not Read It @13    9 months ago

Funny, I would be rich if I got paid for every time I was cussed too.  

 
 
 
Hal A. Lujah
Professor Guide
14  Hal A. Lujah    9 months ago

Trump is so poor that he can’t even afford to get an ID so he can buy a loaf of bread at the grocery store.

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
14.1  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It  replied to  Hal A. Lujah @14    9 months ago

I am so sorry for him.

To think a BROKE BILLIONAIRE (B&B), I have never, in my 82 years such a thing.  And I have seen many disgusting thing.

Please, help Donnie pay off his Bond Fees. After all, he had to "TEAR DOWN AMERICA" to build it up.
 
"Dirty Diaper Donnie" (That is DJT's love-er-lee nickname is what his most intimate friend calls Donnie behind his back, As I do, too).

Donnie needs our help. Send me the MONEY, diamonds, rings, etc., and I will appraise them, then forward them to Donnie. (Free of Charge, because I love Dirty Diaper Donnie soiled DEPENDS.

We are going to be selling his AUTOGRAPHED DIAPERS very soon for ONLY $250, plus $250 for S/H, and another $250 because you, ARSE WIPES, are that STUPID.

 
 
 
Buzz of the Orient
Professor Expert
15  Buzz of the Orient    9 months ago

I could be the biggest folklorist referred to herein, and in any event I DO want Scotty to beam me back to those early 1950s when families played games, and I won't put this in Chinese, but Trump is so poor that he has to sell his golden calf image and by doing so lose the prayers of the morons of America.

OIP-C.hdJat_3og6oo4bJ1NozsQgAAAA?rs=1&pid=ImgDetMain

 
 
 
Igknorantzruls
Sophomore Quiet
15.1  Igknorantzruls  replied to  Buzz of the Orient @15    9 months ago

as opposed to neon

 
 
 
Buzz of the Orient
Professor Expert
15.1.1  Buzz of the Orient  replied to  Igknorantzruls @15.1    9 months ago

???

 
 
 
Igknorantzruls
Sophomore Quiet
15.1.2  Igknorantzruls  replied to  Buzz of the Orient @15.1.1    9 months ago

Simon and Garfunkel   The Sound of Silence  ; lyrics

"And the people bowed and prayed
To the neon god they made
And the sign flashed out its warning
In the words that it was forming
And the sign said, "The words of the prophets are written on the subway walls
In tenement halls"
And whispered in the sounds of silence"

 
 
 
Buzz of the Orient
Professor Expert
15.1.3  Buzz of the Orient  replied to  Igknorantzruls @15.1.2    9 months ago

A wonderful song.  

 
 
 
Igknorantzruls
Sophomore Quiet
15.1.4  Igknorantzruls  replied to  Buzz of the Orient @15.1.3    9 months ago

did ya think i was messing with you Buzz ?

 
 
 
Buzz of the Orient
Professor Expert
15.1.5  Buzz of the Orient  replied to  Igknorantzruls @15.1.4    9 months ago

No

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
15.1.6  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It  replied to  Igknorantzruls @15.1.2    9 months ago

Wow, I liked that song, but never knew the lyrics.  That is profound. 
Thanks, Igknorantzruls.


And, here, I thought you were just Ignorant, and not a ARTISTIC TYPE!

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
15.2  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It  replied to  Buzz of the Orient @15    9 months ago

NOW, that is poor. So poor that I almost feel sorry for him.

 
 
 
cjcold
Professor Quiet
16  cjcold    9 months ago

Trump is so poor that he can't afford a conscience or a moral code.

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
16.1  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It  replied to  cjcold @16    9 months ago

One has minimized in these POOR DAYS of YORE, so I make a choice between:
CONSCIENCE OR MORAL CODE!

I got rid of MORAL CODE, that is so expensive to maintain.

It's a good thing, that I, like my HERO, "Dirty Diaper Donnie" don't have No Conscience.

I don't even like "Cons" or "Science".
"Cons" be always cheatin' me out of money, furniture, even my toothpaste. As fer,
"Sigh-Ants", who in HADES need those headache?

 
 
 
Igknorantzruls
Sophomore Quiet
17  Igknorantzruls    9 months ago

Trump is so pour, he needs a funnel

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
17.1  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It  replied to  Igknorantzruls @17    9 months ago

Trump is so POOR... he is selling his SWEAT as cologne.

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
18  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It    9 months ago

TRUMP IS SO POOR that he is swapping his SPIT for CASH.

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
19  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It    9 months ago

My "sauces", GHOULIANA & BUTT WIPER EXTRAORDINAIRE", Mike Johnson, claims that TRUMP is so POOR ... He forced Melanoma to return to her first job - STREET WALKER. 

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
20  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It    9 months ago

Trump is so POOR, that he has stooped to autographing his "Dirty Diapers", and selling them at his "RALLYS WITH HILLBIILLIES".

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
21  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It    9 months ago

Trump is so POOR, he is sleeping with Steve (Wino) Bunions in the basement of the Washington Monument. (In the same sleeping bag)

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
22  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It    9 months ago

T-Rump is so desperate that he sold the CRACK in his ARSE to the highest bidder. (Elongated Muskrat)

Our "sauces" say that it is going for an undisclosed amount of money, estimated to be over $550,000,000, which should get those "UGLY financial cows off his back", according to FAKE FOX FUGAZY-UP NEWS! 

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
23  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It    9 months ago

T-Rumpled Head is so BROKE...that he sold his GOLD TOILET to Putin.

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
24  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It    9 months ago

TRUMP IS SO POOR...He sold his SOUL to the Devil for a dollar ($1.00).

What have your found out?

 
 
 
Eat The Press Do Not Read It
Professor Guide
25  author  Eat The Press Do Not Read It    9 months ago

TRUMP is so POOR...Russia had to post his 90.7 million dollar bond for E. Jean Carrol's defamation cost.

(The lesson here, is "DON'T RAPE A WOMEN IN A WELL KNOWN, EXPENSIVE DEPARTMENT STORE. Do it in an alley!"

 
 

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