James Comer Throwing First Biden Impeachment Hearing Next Week, Promises No New Evidence Against Bidens - Wonkette
By: Evan Hurst
Set expectations low and ye will meet them.
Mark your damn calendars for next Thursday, September 28, 2023, because that is the day House Oversight Piglet Hillbilly James Comer of Kentucky has announced for the first impeachment hearing into Joseph Robinette Biden, for the crime of don't worry about it, he just gives them bad vibes.
When asked if the hearing would reveal new evidence, committee Chairman James Comer (R-Ky.) said the hearing is not expected to cover new ground and took a dig at the media.
"Well, I think that some of you need to have a refresher course on the existing evidence, so we'll probably rehash some of that if for no other purpose to help educate the Washington, D.C., press corps," he said.
That's what he always says. He goes on TV constantly and says he's fixin' to think about lookin' at he reckons gonna any day now what you gotta understand about followin' the money is that sometimes yer followin' and sometimes yer leadin' gotta know when to hold 'em gotta know when to fold 'em JINGLE JANGLE JINGLE JANGLE BANJO BANJO STRUUUUUUUUUMMMMMMMMMMMM!
(Exact quote from every time James Comer has ever spoken aloud in his life.)
Even The Hill, which is an absolute garbage news source, and which during Donald Trump's first impeachment helped launder so many of fake journalist John Solomon's Kremlin-infused lies about BIDEN'S UKRAINE CORRUPTIONSSSSSSS, is laughing at Comer here:
Republicans have claimed that then-Vice President Biden accepted a $5 million bribe in exchange for helping oust Ukrainian prosecutor Viktor Shokin over an investigation into Burisma, the Ukrainian gas company where Hunter Biden was a board member.
President Biden's actions were in line with calls from other world leaders at the time, and emails among State Department officials from the time show it was Shokin's failure to address corruption in his own country that led to the push to remove him.
Yeah uh huh. As literally every Republican member of Congress who works anywhere near foreign policy and was present at the time knows full well. Any one of them who says differently has dementia, is an anti-American liar, or both. (See: Ron Johnson, senator from the em-blue-ning state of Wisconsin.)
Ron Johnson, Walking Simpson's 'You Tried' Gif, Releases Biden Ukraine Report
·September 23, 2020
And we make a lot of fun of James Comer for being irretrievably stupid — because he is — but he knows he's full of shit, we are pretty sure. How can he not? All of this is just recycled crap from Rudy Giuliani's Russian spy buddies, back when Donald Trump was trying to force Ukraine to help him steal the 2020 election.
Here is a box full of links to James Comer setting his dick on fire and eating it, promising Biden revelations that never, ever come:
James Comer Drops BOMBSHELL, Says Devil Joe Biden Eats Dinner Sometimes, In Places, With People
PSA: New GOP House Oversight Chair James Comer Is A F*cking Clown
Oversight Chair James Comer Wonders When Prosecutors Will Lock Up ... Beau Biden???
Is Devon Archer The Hunter Biden Smoking Gun, Or Is James Comer Just Lightin' Farts Again?
Democrats Dick-Kicked James Comer And His Hunter Biden Whistleblowers For Whole Day Yesterday, And It Was Televised!
James Comer Tells DOJ No Fair, He Saw Hunter Biden's Dick First!
House Republicans Ain't Investigatin' Stolen Trump Docs, What Part Of Hunter Baaah-den You Ain't Get?
·November 22, 2022
James Comer NAILS! Biden For Maybe Knowing About Possible Schemes His Family Coulda Done With Perhaps China?
Oh No, What Is Joe Biden Doing To James Comer's Informants Who Are Definitely Real And Not Imaginary?
James Comer Knows What Joe Biden Did! Party's Over, Joe! Resign Before He Tells Everybody What You Did!
GOP Oversight Chair James Comer SO MAD White House Won't Let Him Bone Special Counsel Investigation
Oh No, Is The IRS Bullying One Of James Comer's Imaginary Whistlefriends?
James Comer Announces Plan To Turn Oversight Committee Into Benghazi-Dick Pic-Cancel Culture-Palooza
Has James Comer Just Been Begging FBI To Let Him Sniff Rudy's Russian Spy Farts This Whole Time?
CONFIRMED: James Comer Just Sniffing Rudy Giuliani's Russian Spy Farts And Calling It A Biden Investigation
If We Could Keep This Hunter Biden Investigation About Hunter Biden, That Would Be Great, Mmkay?
Even Fox News Seems Pretty Sure James Comer And Ron Johnson's Biden Investigations F*ckin' Dumb
James Comer Knows What Laws Hunter Biden's Wangle Doodle Broke But SHHHH He Can't Tell You Yet
Jesus, that is a box of links.
Know who's on the Oversight Committee? Jamie Raskin is the co-chair, and dashing Dan Goldman is dashing fuckin' Dan Goldman.
They and the rest of the committee Democrats are going to annihilate these fucks for sport.
Your Congress Boyfriend Dan Goldman Is Already Kicking The Sh*t Out Of Republicans' Fake Biden Impeachment