After Donald Trump's deranged balcony address, we're all gasping together

Via:  Ender  •  2 months ago  •  20 comments

By:   Marina Hyde

After Donald Trump's deranged balcony address, we're all gasping together
The president tells us he beat coronavirus like a man: the kind who takes all the best drugs and leaves everyone else exposed

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S E E D E D   C O N T E N T

A rare moment of unity in the US election, as Donald Trump marked his return to the White House by   gasping along with his detractors . On Monday night, the president puffed up the front staircase of his residence, his face coated in several more gallons of paint than the front elevation of the building. “Don’t let it dominate your lives,” he panted of the virus, a bad case of which tends to dominate your death.

Yet there he was, this hideous kink in the arc of history, giving the most dangerous balcony performance since Michael Jackson had his baby   crowdsurf off one . The American people are all Blanket now.

As for the optics, “deranged balcony address” is certainly a look – but not one that tends to end well. How might this version turn out? Unfortunately, it’s not a question Trump’s attention span equips him to answer. His reference points for the form are the occasional three minutes of historical documentaries he’s forced to watch while searching his stomach-folds for the TV remote. It feels like he switches over to Fox News before discovering how a whole series of 20 th -century balcony stories ended.

Still: don’t call him Wussolini. He beat this illness – which he still very much has – like a man. One of the really manly ones, who takes all the best drugs and leaves everyone else exposed and misled and unprotected. Even so, early reactions to the gasping spectacle suggest the move could only have backfired more if Trump had ascended the front steps via a hastily installed stairlift carrying a pack of adult diapers.

Once he’d wheezed through the unpleasantries, all that remained was to   remove his mask   and set about infecting any remaining staff yet to be exposed to his droplets. Think of Trump as the 83rd Airborne, parachuting his deadly particles deep into butlers’ respiratory systems. He won’t give you a Purple Heart, but he might give you purple lungs.

Alas, it’s disappointing to find potential victims failing to feel grateful for the opportunity. One current secret service agent assigned to the first family’s detail expressed frustration,   telling CNN : “We’re not disposable.” Two housekeeping staff have already tested positive for the virus. As the events of the past week show, the president’s respect for human life is so low that he is willing to send an entire army of servants into 14-day isolation or worse in order to keep up a steady stream of trans-fats being fed to him. Dying in the line of duty used to mean taking a bullet for the president; it could now involve taking him a Diet Coke. Thank you for your drinks service.

As for how Trump spent the rest of his evening, I assume it was straight on to the monstrous leaders’ WhatsApp to josh with the other bros about how they kill their underlings. RocketmanKim loves a firing squad, Vlad69’s a huge chemicals guy, but Trump just clears his throat while being brought his fourth burger of the day. Boom! “I cough on them like a bitch!   When you’re famous you can do that .”

Face it, he’s absolutely bossing the likes of Kim and Xi and MBS in the fantasy evildoer leagues. It’s not that the other guys don’t have lethal motorcades and abysmal interiors taste and balcony addresses and death cults and doctors who mislead the world. But doing them in a democracy – well, that makes it triple points.

Speaking of physicians who really need to heal themselves, what a striking misinformation campaign it’s been from presidential medic   Sean Conley , who has been continually obfuscating about Trump’s condition since calling his symptoms “mild”, only for even the White House to contradict him. For me, that’s the new low. Of course, we now expect the president of the United States to lie as default – to tell us black is white, or up is down, or to claim he never said something he’s on camera saying. But for a professional and senior doctor to mislead apparently without remorse shows how necrotic the body politic has become, from the very top down. The lying, the reality-denying is not a one-off case – it’s the other epidemic.

In fact, it’s kind of amazing that conspiracy theorists have lined up so supportively behind Trump, when he’s really the most convincing proof yet of all their worst fears. The Man really is lying to them, he really is wicked, and he really does want to kill them. The damning evidence is right there in front of everyone. Only, instead of begging Oliver Stone to make a film about it, they want to give Trump a second term.

Like me, you probably hate to see a conspiracist wimp out of their beliefs just when it’s coming up roses for them. It’s as if the moon landing hoaxers were signing over their life savings to Nasa, or the flat Earthers booking a round-the-world ticket. So come on, guys – back yourselves! After all, if not now, then when?


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1  seeder  Ender    2 months ago

Wussolini.   Hahaha

1.1  r.t..b...  replied to  Ender @1    2 months ago

The optics of a desperate, self-serving address coming this weekend from the White House balcony should give us all pause. And the optics are bad enough...the content, as always, promises to be even worse. 

1.1.1  MAGA  replied to  r.t..b... @1.1    2 months ago

You mean a 17 minute speech where he was alone with no one anywhere near him and every one in the assembly below wearing masks outdoors?  

1.1.2  seeder  Ender  replied to  MAGA @1.1.1    2 months ago

Keep on keeping on.

Your worship of a false god is duly noted.

1.1.3  r.t..b...  replied to  MAGA @1.1.1    2 months ago

Feel free to count the minutes, MAGA, for they are numbered. 

1.1.4  MAGA  replied to  r.t..b... @1.1.3    2 months ago

They are. The minutes to Jan. 20, 2025 are indeed counting down. 

1.1.5  MAGA  replied to  Ender @1.1.2    2 months ago


1.1.6  seeder  Ender  replied to  MAGA @1.1.5    2 months ago

Doesn't stop the worship now does it...

Sister Mary Agnes Ample Bottom
1.1.7  Sister Mary Agnes Ample Bottom  replied to  Ender @1.1.6    2 months ago
Doesn't stop the worship now does it...

Especially for the paltry sum of $250 a month.

1.1.8  MAGA  replied to  Ender @1.1.6    2 months ago


1.1.9  MAGA  replied to  MAGA @1.1.5    2 months ago


1.1.10  MAGA  replied to  MAGA @1.1.5    2 months ago

Which one?  Which religion or faith did I supposedly do that for. The Islamic, the Christian, The Jewish?  The one part of a trinity or the one without?  Or is the simple statement that there is a God and that no man or his constructs are He proselytizing in your opinion?

1.1.11  MAGA  replied to  MAGA @1.1.1    2 months ago


1.1.12  seeder  Ender  replied to  MAGA @1.1.11    2 months ago

Stop spamming.

1.1.13  bbl-1  replied to  MAGA @1.1.10    2 months ago

Faith is an ill used commodity in the world of MAGA.

2  sandy-2021492    2 months ago

I'm glad this was at least outdoors, since he had his mask off.  Likely minimal chance to others of exposure.

But he looked awful.  I'd had a slight hope that having been infected himself, he would cease to downplay coronavirus.  But I suppose he has to keep it up, because his own infection highlights just how abysmal his administration's response has been.

2.1  MAGA  replied to  sandy-2021492 @2    2 months ago

He took it off to speak.  He was alone and far from any in the crowd.  He looked and felt fine.  The experts said when the virus was at its worst that we could well lose 250,000 if we did everything right and well in excess of 2,000,000 if we did nothing. They numbers are closer by far to everything right than doing it all wrong or nothing.  The numbers are still worse in States, cities, areas controlled by blue than by red.  

2.1.1  devangelical  replied to  MAGA @2.1    2 months ago

texas and florida are blue states now? cool.

2.1.2  Kavika   replied to  devangelical @2.1.1    2 months ago

DeSantis is doing a great job in Florida. Let's see over 15,000 dead and in the last three days over 400 deaths. A positivity rate of over 10% and it's been over 10% since June.

Hell of a job DeSantis.

3  Kavika     2 months ago

Wussolini, LMAO classic.



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