Shoot The Gap - Two Texans Die Trying 2019 Darwin Award Winner

  
Via:  Trout Giggles  •  2 months ago  •  60 comments


Shoot The Gap - Two Texans Die Trying 2019 Darwin Award Winner
You cannot last long when the road beats you in an IQ test. Unlike the Blues Brothers, they lacked cop tires, cop engine, cop suspension--and a mission from Gawd.

Sponsored by group SiNNERs and ButtHeads

SiNNERs and ButtHeads

S E E D E D   C O N T E N T


(24 May 2019, Louisiana) Black Bayou Draw Bridge, situated six miles south of Lake Charles, was closed to car traffic and open for a boat to pass through. That drawn drawbridge presented an irresistible challenge to two Texas men, aged 23 and 32, looking for fun on Friday night. May their experiment be a warning to you, my friend.

A witness observed the passenger emerge, push up the arm of the safety gate, and climb back into the car. Then the Chevy Cruze backed up a short distance and accelerated hard up the drawbridge ramp... up and over the edge. Splash!

You cannot last long when the road beats you in an IQ test. Unlike the Blues Brothers, they lacked cop tires, cop engine, cop suspension--and a mission from Gawd.


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Trout Giggles
1  seeder  Trout Giggles    2 months ago

How about that? They weren't even from Florida this time. Or Arkansas.

There's more at the link. Have fun with this seed coz we need to lighten up around here.

And, please...no politics

 
 
 
r.t..b...
1.1  r.t..b...  replied to  Trout Giggles @1    2 months ago
we need to lighten up around here

Hear, hear!! The road to perdition, paved with a healthy overlay of  'what could go wrong?'. Looking for fun in all the wrong places.

 
 
 
Trout Giggles
1.1.1  seeder  Trout Giggles  replied to  r.t..b... @1.1    2 months ago

I have a morbid sense of humor

 
 
 
Sister Mary Agnes Ample Bottom
1.1.2  Sister Mary Agnes Ample Bottom  replied to  Trout Giggles @1.1.1    2 months ago
I have a morbid sense of humor

It's the only reason I hang out with you. 

 
 
 
Trout Giggles
1.1.3  seeder  Trout Giggles  replied to  Sister Mary Agnes Ample Bottom @1.1.2    2 months ago

I thought my good looks was part of my charm, too

 
 
 
Freefaller
1.2  Freefaller  replied to  Trout Giggles @1    2 months ago

Lol I haven't read the seed yet but I'm gonna guess alcohol was involved.

 
 
 
SteevieGee
1.3  SteevieGee  replied to  Trout Giggles @1    2 months ago

Famous last words.  "Dude, hold my beer and watch this."

 
 
 
Ender
2  Ender    2 months ago

Little known tidbit. The I-10 bridge in Lake Charles actually is decorated with ironwork that is pistols.

512

 
 
 
Trout Giggles
2.1  seeder  Trout Giggles  replied to  Ender @2    2 months ago

I never noticed that and I've been over that bridge numerous times

 
 
 
XDm9mm
2.2  XDm9mm  replied to  Ender @2    2 months ago
Little known tidbit. The I-10 bridge in Lake Charles actually is decorated with ironwork that is pistols.

Damn....   I have no idea how many times I've been over that bridge and never noticed that.   Maybe it's due to paying attention to the idiots on the road and doing everything I can to avoid them.

Thanks for pointing it out.  I'll definitely look for them next time I head that way.

 
 
 
Ender
2.2.1  Ender  replied to  XDm9mm @2.2    2 months ago

No kidding. That bridge is scary enough. It is unique though. I looked last time I went to Houston.

Supposed to be some kind of homage to pirates or something.

 
 
 
igknorantzrulz
2.2.2  igknorantzrulz  replied to  XDm9mm @2.2    2 months ago

the idiots aren't on the road, they're in the lake, but point taken.

 
 
 
Kavika
3  Kavika     2 months ago

11a8qu.jpg

A Chevy Cruze are you kidding me. 153 HP in a 1.4 liter engine...it couldn't jump a mud puddle.

 
 
 
Trout Giggles
3.1  seeder  Trout Giggles  replied to  Kavika @3    2 months ago

When I read "Chevy Cruze" I was like....these guys are brain dead!

Now they really are

 
 
 
MrFrost
3.2  MrFrost  replied to  Kavika @3    2 months ago

My weedeater puts out more HP than that..

 
 
 
Freefaller
3.3  Freefaller  replied to  Kavika @3    2 months ago

To much Dukes of Hazard reruns is my guess

 
 
 
TTGA
3.4  TTGA  replied to  Kavika @3    2 months ago
153 HP in a 1.4 liter engine...it couldn't jump a mud puddle.

My wife has one of those.  It hesitates for at least five seconds before it gives you any acceleration (if the term fits) at all.  I could pedal a bike faster.  I'd give long odds that Freefaller and Steevie are right about the alcohol.

A pretty dumb stunt but not quite as dumb as the best of the Darwins.  That one has to be the guy who, having blown one of the little tubular fuses in his car (the fuse box being under the dash right in front of the steering column) and not having a spare, replaced it with a .22LR cartridge.  Although he didn't die, he did effectively remove himself from the gene pool when it blew up right between his legs.

 
 
 
Ender
4  Ender    2 months ago

They are everywhere. At least some of them might not be able to reproduce...

512

 
 
 
XDm9mm
4.1  XDm9mm  replied to  Ender @4    2 months ago
At least some of them might not be able to reproduce...

And now for a minor correction to your verbiage:

At least some of them HOPEFULLY will not be able to reproduce.  The gene pool is already sufficiently degraded without them adding yet more.

PS:  From the video clip you posted, there's a possibility that two of them might have rendered themselves 'fruitless'.

 
 
 
Trout Giggles
4.1.1  seeder  Trout Giggles  replied to  XDm9mm @4.1    2 months ago

I think it's more like all of them

 
 
 
XDm9mm
4.1.2  XDm9mm  replied to  Trout Giggles @4.1.1    2 months ago
I think it's more like all of them

I think the one guy might be suffering from rectal separitis.  Or a rear facing "Smiley Face".

 
 
 
Trout Giggles
4.1.3  seeder  Trout Giggles  replied to  XDm9mm @4.1.2    2 months ago

The one guy hooked to the rope is getting a wedgie. The other 2 burned their balls on that board

 
 
 
XDm9mm
5  XDm9mm    2 months ago
two Texas men, aged 23 and 32, looking for fun on Friday night.

I'm sorry, but I really need to make a minor correction to the authors work:

two ABJECT MORONIC BRAIN DEAD Texas IDIOTS, aged 23 and 32, looking for fun on Friday night.

 
 
 
JBB
5.1  JBB  replied to  XDm9mm @5    2 months ago

You can always tell a Texan. You just can't tell a Texan much...

 
 
 
Sister Mary Agnes Ample Bottom
5.2  Sister Mary Agnes Ample Bottom  replied to  XDm9mm @5    2 months ago
two ABJECT MORONIC BRAIN DEAD Texas IDIOTS, aged 23 and 32, looking for fun on Friday night.

Ha!  Although I'm not sure why I'm laughing.  I'm often referred to as an abject, moronic, brain dead, Texas idiot.

 
 
 
†hε pε⊕pレε'š ƒïšh
6  †hε pε⊕pレε'š ƒïšh    2 months ago

Years ago for entertainment we use to drink and jump old trade ins off the ramps.

320

 
 
 
MrFrost
7  MrFrost    2 months ago

512

I am assuming that's a 60 pound bag of cement. Idiots...

 
 
 
Trout Giggles
7.1  seeder  Trout Giggles  replied to  MrFrost @7    2 months ago

That's the Three Stooges Construction Company

 
 
 
MrFrost
7.1.1  MrFrost  replied to  Trout Giggles @7.1    2 months ago

Well, yea. 60 pound bag dropped what...10-12 feet, onto a guy that looks like he is 150 pounds soaking wet? Not gonna work.. LOL 

 
 
 
XDm9mm
7.2  XDm9mm  replied to  MrFrost @7    2 months ago
Idiots...

You're being kind.

And if you look closely, it looks like he probably did come out of that fight with the bag of cement or stucco with a broken clavicle.  

 
 
 
MrFrost
7.2.1  MrFrost  replied to  XDm9mm @7.2    2 months ago

Yer right, I didn't see that. 

 
 
 
Ender
8  Ender    2 months ago

What happens when trying to show off while running from the cops...

512

 
 
 
r.t..b...
8.1  r.t..b...  replied to  Ender @8    2 months ago

All that needs is some clever bumper music.

 
 
 
MrFrost
8.1.1  MrFrost  replied to  r.t..b... @8.1    2 months ago

Ask and you shall receive. 

 
 
 
Split Personality
8.1.2  Split Personality  replied to  MrFrost @8.1.1    2 months ago

this should be the back ground music for the whole article, lol.

 
 
 
MrFrost
8.1.3  MrFrost  replied to  Split Personality @8.1.2    2 months ago

True! 

 
 
 
XDm9mm
8.2  XDm9mm  replied to  Ender @8    2 months ago
What happens when trying to show off while running from the cops...

If the last second of that clip was not sped up, why is that cop not running in the Olympics?   Hell, he doesn't need a squad car to run down speeders, just lace up the running shoes and he's good to go.

 
 
 
MrFrost
8.2.1  MrFrost  replied to  XDm9mm @8.2    2 months ago
why is that cop not running in the Olympics? 

Coffee and doughnuts..... Sugar and caffeine high. 

 
 
 
Ender
9  Ender    2 months ago

Darwin award for the ice bucket challenge...

512

 
 
 
Perrie Halpern R.A.
9.1  Perrie Halpern R.A.  replied to  Ender @9    2 months ago

LMAO!

 
 
 
MrFrost
9.2  MrFrost  replied to  Ender @9    2 months ago

That operator.....first day on the job? WTF? 

 
 
 
Ender
9.2.1  Ender  replied to  MrFrost @9.2    2 months ago

Then still dumps the water on him...

 
 
 
MrFrost
9.2.2  MrFrost  replied to  Ender @9.2.1    2 months ago

Then still dumps the water on him...

The definition of "adding insult to injury". 

 
 
 
bccrane
9.2.3  bccrane  replied to  MrFrost @9.2.2    2 months ago

Hey if it knocked him out, what better way to revive him.

 
 
 
Trout Giggles
9.3  seeder  Trout Giggles  replied to  Ender @9    2 months ago

I hope that guy didn't get a fractured skull

 
 
 
Ender
9.3.1  Ender  replied to  Trout Giggles @9.3    2 months ago

Or a broken neck.

 
 
 
r.t..b...
9.3.2  r.t..b...  replied to  Trout Giggles @9.3    2 months ago
I hope that guy didn't get a fractured skull

..[crane]iectomy. 

 
 
 
Ender
10  Ender    2 months ago

Inept criminals...

512

 
 
 
Trout Giggles
10.1  seeder  Trout Giggles  replied to  Ender @10    2 months ago

Those guys are dumb

 
 
 
Freefaller
10.2  Freefaller  replied to  Ender @10    2 months ago

I have a great mental picture of the police stumbling upon both of them unconscious on the ground and saying WTF!

 
 
 
Ender
11  Ender    2 months ago

Let me warm this up..

512

 
 
 
Ender
11.1  Ender  replied to  Ender @11    2 months ago

Along those lines...

512

I am having too much fun with this.  Haha

 
 
 
Sister Mary Agnes Ample Bottom
11.1.1  Sister Mary Agnes Ample Bottom  replied to  Ender @11.1    2 months ago
I am having too much fun with this.

You can never have too much fun with this.

 
 
 
Trout Giggles
11.1.2  seeder  Trout Giggles  replied to  Sister Mary Agnes Ample Bottom @11.1.1    2 months ago

I have only one question....what the hell is wrong with people?

 
 
 
igknorantzrulz
11.1.3  igknorantzrulz  replied to  Trout Giggles @11.1.2    2 months ago

everything

 
 
 
BeastOfTheEast
12  BeastOfTheEast    2 months ago

While I was serving on a jury in an armed robbery case the prosecutor asked the victim if the person who robbed him was in the courtroom, the accused raised his hand and says " Here"  jrSmiley_78_smiley_image.gif   

 
 
 
Ender
12.1  Ender  replied to  BeastOfTheEast @12    2 months ago

Hahaha

512

 
 
 
Goodtime Charlie
12.1.1  Goodtime Charlie  replied to  Ender @12.1    2 months ago

That's what his lawyer said.

 
 
 
Goodtime Charlie
12.2  Goodtime Charlie  replied to  BeastOfTheEast @12    2 months ago

jrSmiley_10_smiley_image.gif Was he found guilty? lol

 
 
 
TTGA
13  TTGA    2 months ago

Here's one that you might find interesting.  Came upon it a couple of years back on YouTube.  About as funny as it can get.  It's about 11 minutes long and I don't know if the stomach muscles can take that much laughing.

How Not To Use Dynamite

 
 
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