A Couple Days Late, But Still Funny
Two Irish lads were working for the local county council. One lad would dig a hole and the other lad would follow him and fill the hole in.
They worked up along one street and then down the other. They then moved to the next street and did the same, working flat out all day without stopping.
One lad digging the holes. The other lad filling them in.
A passerby saw what they were doing and was amazed at the hard work, but couldn’t understand what they were at.
So, he shouted over to the lad digging the holes, ‘I don’t get it – why do you dig a hole, only for the other lad to fill it in?’
The lad wiped his brow and sighed deeply, ‘Well, I suppose it probably does looks a bit odd. You see, we’re normally a three-man team. But today the lad who plants the trees phoned in sick.'
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Two Irishmen were walking out of a funeral. One turns to the other and says, ‘It was a beautiful ceremony, wasn’t it?!’
‘It was’, replied the friend.
‘Listen – when I die, will you pour a decent bottle of whiskey over my grave, as a toast?’.
‘I will’, says the friend. ‘But would you mind if I run it through my kidneys first?'
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A man from Cork was in with his doctor. ‘Look, David. I’ve some bad news and some terrible news for you.’
‘God. What’s the bad news?!’, asked the patient.
‘Well’, replied the doctor, ‘You only have 3 days to live’.
‘You’re joking’ says the patient. ‘How the f**k can the news get any worse?!’.
‘Well’, says the doctor, ‘I’ve been trying to get hold of you for the past 2 days’.
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As usual, my 91 year old brother is the source, even though he isn't Irish. If you at least got a smile out of these, please vote it up and post a short comment so this doesn't get wiped off the front page in 8 hours like most of my posted articles, in order to allow more NT members to see it.
WHY DO I EVEN FUCKING BOTHER POSTING JOKES ON THIS SITE WHERE NOTHING ELSE IS FUNNY, CERTAINLY NOT THE POLITICS? THIS POST COULDN'T LAST A HALF A DAY - I GUESS FOR MOST HERE IT SIMPLY WASN'T A LAUGH A DAY.