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Most embarrassing first date

  
By:  Buzz of the Orient  •  3 weeks ago  •  12 comments


Most embarrassing first date
 

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Most embarrassing first date

This is apparently true and very funny.

Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. The winner described her worst first date experience. There was absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize!

She said it was midwinter, snowing and quite cold... and the guy had taken her skiing in the mountains outside Salt Lake City, Utah. It was a day trip (no overnight).

They were strangers, after all, and had never met before. The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed home late that afternoon. They were driving back down the mountain when she gradually began to realize that she should not have had that extra latte !!

They were about an hour away from anywhere with a restroom and in the middle of nowhere! Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which she did for a while.

Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow going, there came a point where she told him that he had better stop and let her go beside the road, or it would be the front seat of his car.

They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked her pants down and started. In the deep snow she didn't have good footing, so she let her butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself.

Her companion stood on the side of the car watching for traffic and indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking. All she could think about was the relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of the situation.

Upon finishing, however, she soon became aware of another sensation. As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were firmly glued against the car's fender.

Thoughts of tongues frozen to poles immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem, due to the extreme cold.

Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the moment, she answered her date's concerns about' what is taking so long' with a reply that indeed, she was 'freezing her butt off' and in need of some assistance!

He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater and then, as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out laughing. She too got the giggles and when they finally managed to compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma. Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced with a real problem.

Both agreed it would take something hot to free her chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal! Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the first place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her free. So, as she looked the other way, her first-time date proceeded to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender.

As the audience screamed in laughter, she took the Tonight Show prize hands down. Or perhaps that should be 'pants down'. And you thought your first date was embarrassing.

Jay Leno's comment..... 'This gives a whole new meaning to being pissed off.'

Oh, and how did the first date turn out? He became her husband and was sitting next to her on the Leno show.

If you laughed at this pass it on. Remember, if you haven't got a smile on your face and laughter in your heart, then you are just a sour old fart or tart.


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Buzz of the Orient
Professor Expert
1  author  Buzz of the Orient    3 weeks ago

I wasn't going to post anything these days, because I decided that it just wasn't worth posting anything unless it was about American politics because it would be wiped off the board within hours and nobody would see it.  But I thought it was so funny, and that these days things just aren't funny at all, so since my brother emailed it to me I will share it.  At the end of the joke it said that if we laughed at it we should pass it on, and I did laugh at it, so here it is. 

So to keep it visible for a while so more members will get to read it and hopefully get a laugh out of it please vote it up and/or make a comment on it or else there is no way most members will get to see it so PLEASE put in that tiny bit of effort and help to keep this on the Front (Home) Page for at least a day. 

 
 
 
MonsterMash
Sophomore Quiet
1.1  MonsterMash  replied to  Buzz of the Orient @1    3 weeks ago

That was hilarious jrSmiley_10_smiley_image.gif

 
 
 
Buzz of the Orient
Professor Expert
1.1.1  author  Buzz of the Orient  replied to  MonsterMash @1.1    3 weeks ago

I thought it was time the NT members would have a break from the recent news. 

 
 
 
shona1
Professor Quiet
2  shona1    3 weeks ago

Evening...we were driving out of the drive in, yep the good old days and his car stalled right at the exit..so all the cars were banked up behind us..

We were killing ourselves laughing and some other people helped push the car out of the way so everyone could leave.. finally got the car going and got home..

He has since passed away but I still remember that night clear as..😁😁

 
 
 
Buzz of the Orient
Professor Expert
3  author  Buzz of the Orient    3 weeks ago

Can't match that - my only similar experience was when just exiting a drive-in theatre a car rear-ended mine and pushed mine into the car ahead of me, but nobody was laughing.  It turned out to be an insurance situation all around. 

 
 
 
Igknorantzruls
Freshman Quiet
4  Igknorantzruls    3 weeks ago

my first real "date" with the only girl i ever thought about marrying, was a nice steak dinner at a nice and fairly fancy restaurant in the neighborhood, I had picked her up in the city bout a half hour south and since i had recently been to Europe, with six other CRAZY mutha fckrerz, and since we had talked about it during dinner we decided to go to my place and check out the video we actually did make, and that was an accomplishment, of empirical proportions. As  *******;s European HELL Tour  91' , was quite the FRCK N Xperience, that not one could ever easily forget. I had rented a video camera that made US look like a drunken American Newsteam, as when, back then, a videoe camera was  the size of a bass guitar caught by a bass phishing to tag him a whopper, but Burger King was closed to the White Castle due to the remote reason, they could not locate the remote remotely, and it wound up draining like a puss filled wound with a bandage wrapped not too tight. 

 So we got a good laugh and some purely provocative octave's from the sound of the Hell Tours' trapse through Europe.

So as we go to leave, she being in a short tight dress and high heels, looking quite likely to impress 

any male man, as she could deliver , and it shot a quiver, up a cruentation's spine so fine,  that it caused her impressive back side, to cushion her fall, asz she went for a ride, down my front steps, and I must confide, rather she had been riding me, butt, U C, that would soon B, what came to B

N, 2 B continued....

 
 
 
Buzz of the Orient
Professor Expert
4.1  author  Buzz of the Orient  replied to  Igknorantzruls @4    3 weeks ago

Well, for sure, I can't match that either. LOL

 
 
 
Buzz of the Orient
Professor Expert
5  author  Buzz of the Orient    3 weeks ago

This joke is doing better than I expected.  After two days 6 NT members have bothered to read it, but as I expected it's been knocked off the Front (Home) Page - however this comment that I'm now posting might push it back on for an hour or two. 

 
 
 
Buzz of the Orient
Professor Expert
5.1  author  Buzz of the Orient  replied to  Buzz of the Orient @5    3 weeks ago

LOL.  No such luck.

 
 
 
shona1
Professor Quiet
5.1.1  shona1  replied to  Buzz of the Orient @5.1    3 weeks ago

Morning... there fixed it..🦘🦘

 
 
 
Buzz of the Orient
Professor Expert
6  author  Buzz of the Orient    3 weeks ago

Thanks, Commonwealth Partner.  It's hard to keep something that isn't about American Politics on the Front (Home) Page these days. 

 
 
 
shona1
Professor Quiet
6.1  shona1  replied to  Buzz of the Orient @6    3 weeks ago

Evening..

You are more than welcome..🦘🦘

 
 

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