Friday Funny - More Adult Truths
- Going to MacDonalds for a salad is like going to a prostitute for a hug
- Raisin cookies that look like chocolate chips cookies are the main reason I have trust issues
- A man came to my door and asked if I could donate to the local swimming pool and I came back with a glass of water
- I cant find a job because I have no experience; I have no experience because I cannot find a job
- A clean room is a sign of a broken computer
- Im in shape. Round is a shape
- Why is it that whenever I make mistakes people always seem to notice?
- That awkward moment when someone you really hate sends you a friends request
- I run with scissors because it makes me feel dangerous
- Gasoline is getting more expensive because transporting it costs more when it gets more expensive.
- Im not anti-social; society is anti-me
- Whoever decided that a one-inch candy bar should be called fun-size need to seriously re-examine their standards for entertainment
- A lie is just a great story that someone ruined with the truth
- After Tuesday even the calendar goes W T F
- Some people walk into our lives and leave footprints on our hearts. Others walk into our lives and we want to leave footprints on their face!
- When a man gets close to a woman wearing a leather mini-skirt, his heart starts beating faster, his throat gets dry, his knees get weak and he becomes irrational.. Why? Because the leather smells like a new car
- TEAM WORK: Having somebody else you can blame it on.
- You know you are getting old when the candles on your birthday cake start to cost more than the cake itself
- It's not important to win, it's important to make the other guy lose.
- A clear conscience is the sure sign of a bad memory.
And finally,
You know your driving is really terrible when your GPS says 'After 300 feet, stop and let me out!'
Whoa - that just blew my mind!
Cute! Thanks! Even though it is Thursday, and I had to check to make sure it wasn't Friday, I really enjoyed the humor!
Thanks, I thoroughly enjoyed this.
Number 16 is classic...LMAO
Is today Friday?
nope, you're all one week late LOL
Just looked at the date...LMAO, that a real gotcha palma.
Very nice way to break up a long afternoon!
In regards to Number 1: I recall a story.....
A German Tourist walked into McDonalds and asked for a beer.....the person laughed at him and said why would you come to McDonalds looking for beer? The german responded, 'You mean that you actually come here for the food?'
I had a similar experience when I moved here from London. As I was going through customs I was asked where I was coming from and when I told him London he asked if I was bringing any food to which I replied "do you call that food"? He laughed and let me pass without checking my luggage
A good one. And a reminder that it is almost FridaY. yay
Nice!
I was living in Turkey in the ealry 1990s and went to Germany for a week long conference and one of my friend insisted we fgo to McDonald's so he could drink a beer there.......I had been living in Turkey.....not a lot of Pork Products and here I am in Germany at a Mickey 'D's. Surreal.