Douchebaggery... Warning adult language. Satire.
Category: The Lighter Side/ Humor
Via: msaubrey-aka-ahyoka • 12 years ago • 18 commentsDoes someoneknow when they're being a douchebag? Or if they're always a douchebag, do they know they're known as The Douchebag? If someone surpasses douchebag status, would that make them a douche-nozzle? Some people are only douchebags when they drink. Some are only douchebags when they are sober. Some only when they're at work. Some all the time.
This goes for women too, but I guess that would classify them as a bitch. I know when I'm being a bitch. Why I'm being a bitch. IfI'm being acomplete irrational hormonal bitch or because you stabbed me in the back and now I'm a bitch because I know what you did. I always know when I'm being a bitch.
Or is douchebaggery and bitchy in different categories. Because I know that a douchebag can be a bitch too. Would that itself create the illusive douche-nozzle? Or is that just a whining dick?
A complete disaster of a human could be a clusterfuck douchebag.
***Q: Do you know when you're being a douchebag?*** Answer In Comments. This should be fun!
Yes, but I don't give a rats hairy ass.
No. I'm never a douchbag.
I would classify myself a bitch, but no douchery here.
Other.
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I need a clear definition of what a douchebag is. I'm not kidding either. I mean I think I know what it is, but I am not sure what makes it different from being a bitch. You can call me an idiot, LOL!
No name calling from me my dear... At least not to you.
From the "Urban Dictionary":
2. A person that is a total moron and doesn't think before he/she speaks or acts.
3. One with an undescribeable idiocy, hence stupidity, poor idea of what's cool, possibly an arrogance about them.
4. One with an intolerable personality.
5. the scientific name for schmucks who roll up in public wearing wife-beaters or oversized jeans. Can also be found wearing sunglasses in nightclubs and/or sun-visors on backwards and upside down. These people should be drug outside and shot in the stomach, then used as speed bumps to prevent any neon-toting lowrider crap-mobiles from infesting the neighborhood and lowering property values.
6. someone who;; talks shit, starts shit, wont finish their shit, &&and the end of the day still thinks they own the universe.
Does that help?
Seems to me that women are always douchebags, right? After all, they are the only ones who use them.
Okay,that didn't come out right. What I meant was that aren't all douchebags women, not the other way around!
Plenty of other names for men.
I don't use them. They're not good to use really.
By your logic, a man could certainly be an enema bag instead then.
Absolutely!
Not that I'm really using logic here. Is this a subject on which logic should be used?
I classify myself as a the biggest bitch on the block or b-cubed. Not a douche tho because I don't think I'm socially inept. However...I know some that are and one or two are women.
No.
Ah HAH! However, I think you're lyin (ROAR!).
damn I never anything past anyone.....
Yes! LOL! I just got schooled!
Well, I just read Terry's comment below, and he does kind of have a point. It's a term used for both men and woman, yet the actual item, is only used by woman... odd I have to say.
But let's go with your definition.
OK so now this goes for any sex.
I am never a douchebag..., since I know I am a numbnut. I can be a bossy boots at times. I also have a temper ( could be the red hair). I can have anoccasionalbitchy moment, but even the hubby would say onlyoccasionally.. my 18 year old daughters might disagree, but then again, they are girls and I think that they have bitchy moments, too!.
Is that honest enough?
From my understanding , the term is a general description of something women are disgusted with and would prefer to discard . Am I being too logical here ?
A rose by any other name ...
Makes sense to me.
That's what I always thought.
Sarcasm is the answer as beating the shit out of someone is illegal... Republicans qualify in my opinion as clusterfuck douchebags... smile
ouch
use Ivory, I hear it's 99% natural.
LOL!