Jamie Lee Curtis Parents, put down your cellphones. Your kids are watching.
S E E D E D C O N T E N T
How many times have you sat with somebody and they're looking at their phone? It's so rude, but that's what's happening to a generation of children with their parents.
Our mothers were, for most of us, our first teachers: We learned everything from them, and we patterned ourselves after them. But now we see moms with their babies, and they're on their phones. So much about parenting a baby is looking them in the eyes, though, and phones get in the way of that.
If our children spend their time looking at us looking our phones — at ourselves on our phones, for that matter — scrolling constantly all day, it's telling them that they should do it, too. But the problem is bigger than that: I'm mortified by what I see on a daily basis on people's social media profiles. There's an obsession with other people's personal lives, and people are obsessed with themselves, which children can't help but pick up on.
As a sober woman of 20 years, one thing I tell parents is that, if the first thing you do when you're celebrating something is to go have a bottle of champagne, or if you have a terrible day at work and go home to your family and say, "Oh my God, it was a terrible day at work, I need a drink," don't be surprised if your young person gets drunk at a party. Don't be surprised because they've seen you do it; how you use your phone, and how often you use your phone, is no different.
You really have to put your phone down, because what's bad for you is bad for your kids. We see so many young people who are dysmorphic, who look in the mirror and are not satisfied with what they see.
It begins with compare and despair: Think about how it feels when you, as an adult, compare your life to those you see in your Instagram feed. It feels like you're not having fun like they are, you're not eating food the way they all are, you don't look the way they all do. Apps have given us this idea that we can alter ourselves— that you alone are not enough, that your being needs to be altered with a bunny face or a chipmunk, with a new voice, with a face that has no blemishes.
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This article caught my attention. For all the time I spend on the site, when I am off site, I am very disconnected. I try not to only use my cell phone as a phone and for GPS. My husband is far more connected to his phone, texting my daughters or his sister throughout the day. Sometimes it appears to me as if he as connected to his phone as my kids are, and I wonder if this was a case of the chicken or the egg. Did he start with the texting or did he pick it up from the kids.
Personally, I feel that people are far too connected via texting that they no longer need to talk. I find this bad and sad. Bad, since I think we are becoming disconnected in every other way, sad because it will only get worse. When I see toddlers playing on phones I gasp.
Hi, Perrie...
I agree with you. I disconnect pretty easily. At the same time, I see how it is with our grandchildren, whose parents must put time limits on using tablets because otherwise the kids would never lift their heads from the screens. The children watch the clock, and scream "It's time!" as soon as their forbidden time is finished.
I don't have a solution. But I certainly see the problem! And it's certain to get worse. I can easily imagine a time when we get "phones" inserted in our skulls. (I'm currently re-reading the Enderverse , from Orson Scott Card, with the computer Jane as a central character...)
I know exactly what you're talking about. I get irritated when I invite people over and they spend all their time on their phones. My phone pretty much stays in my purse when I get home. I do have an addiction to Candy Crush on my Kindle so there's that. But for the most part I stay off of media other than TV when I get home
Playing a game is just like watching TV. I don't see that as a biggie, LOL.
Ditto. When I'm not on my main desktop or connecting from a laptop via VPN, I'm not online.
Well, my daughter's iphone wasn't good enough, so she got a iwatch. And don't forget those glasses where you can see google. We are more than 3/4 of the way to dystopia.
That being said, I think parents set the tone and so should our schools since they are our second line of defense. Of course, there may be ideas out there that we are not coming up with.
But just to lighten this up.. here is a video of the dangers of too much texting:
There are a few in there that aren't at aii funny.
Still, the incidents present the problem pretty well: how to correctly apportion one's time, how to restrict the electronic invasion of our personal space.
I have to agree with you, Bob. There are a few in there that had me gasp a bit, but I thought maybe I was a little too sensitive.
I live off of a very windy country road and I often worry about people in oncoming traffic and I wonder if they or my kids are texting instead of keeping an eye on the road. In fact, more than 40,000 people died last year due to texting.
The most disturbing is the car that hits a pedestrian in a crosswalk. They both have to be oblivious.... in a life-threatening situation.
This is part of why we need autonomous cars. We can require "proper behavior" from machines more easily than from people...
I almost got hit by a dumbass woman the other day at Kroger while I was walking into the store. AS soon as she got in her car, she had to get on the phone and started backing up. That's when she almost hit me. I got pissed and told Mr Giggles that if she had hit me, I would have pressed charges.
I'm getting mightily sick and tired of people who can't get away from that gd computer in their hand even long enough to watch what the hell they're doing in a grocery store parking lot!
P.S. I could only watch a little bit of that video because I still get nauseous watching people trip and fall.
Someone rearended me one time while they were on their cellphone. I saw her behind me on her cellphone and I got nervous and what do you know?!?
She got out and apologized and asked if I was okay. I said 'I saw you talking on your cellphone' and she said she wasn't familiar with the area and was looking for directions and had the nerve to ask me for directions. I told her which way she needed to go.
There was no harm done so we just went on our way.
I bet you did.
What a sad commentary about people.
I don't know if it's sad.... It's human. Receiving a text message is "immediate satisfaction", irresistible for humans. Machines don't care. It isn't "morality", it's bio-chemistry.
We need to recognize reality, and either block electronically or coordinate electronically.
I hate it with the phone in parking lots. I have seen so many near misses that it almost more shocking that it doesn't happen more often.
My car won't even let me hook up my phone to the bluetooth if I am in reverse. I think all cars should be that way. Do it before you start backing up.
LMAO.. good one Trout!!
So, what you are saying is that there are a whole bunch of people out there with poor impulse control.
I think that's exactly what he's saying
About seven billion, at last estimate.
We're animals. Smarter than most, but still animals, whose behavior is deeply affected by our endocrinal system. Much of our behavior is based on emotion, and all of our behavior is affected by emotion.
Being smart animals, we can decide to follow our reasoning... sometimes.
We should use our brains to control the way we submit to our hormones...
Bluetooth anyone?
Not only hands free, but for many, brains free too.
Nothing like trying to get somebody to address an issue, they are looking straight at you, yet have no idea you are there.
Love those.
I like how the folks who bumped into something just bounced off and kept on texting.
Trouble is mobile devices are part of our daily lives now - and this trend will continue. So it is difficult to give good examples. Clearly a parent should not be sitting around playing games with their phone, but using the phone is almost a necessity nowadays.
That may be true, but when does parent usage become rude? For instance, I have gone restaurants and have seen adults (I am assuming some of them are parents) with the phone at on the table and every two or three minutes seeing them texting. What did we use to do when we went out to dinner and leave the kids?
I would say that when in a social environment it is rude to engage your device rather than talk to your companions. But I suspect those mores are changing too.
I guess by today's standards I am an old fogie. (sp)
I have an old cell phone with no Internet, no text and is only used for urgent calls. It has a camera, but, I don't use it, as I have a better camera that is just a camera for when I want to take a picture.
My cell phone is only for making necessary or emergency or calls when I am away from the house. When I am at home I use my home phone. The only people who have my cell phone number are immediate family and Friends that I really want to hear from. They know that I do not answer my cell phone when driving so they leave me a message and I get back to them as soon as I stop and am off the road.
I do not live for my cell phone, nor does it monopolize my life. I really dislike sitting next to someone who is on their cell phone non-stop and talking loud enough so that everyone in the room can hear their end of the discussion, often leaving nothing to the imagination to those in ear shot.
My flip cell phone cost me $49.95 12 years ago, and still works just fine for what I need a cell phone for. Anything more than that for what I need is a waste. My Granddaughter keeps trying to get me to get one of the new super duper type cell phones like she has, with all the bells and whistles. But, when I need to make an emergency call or get an emergency call while I am away from home, all the bells and whistles are just expensive excess baggage.
But, that's just me.
Resist!
I hope not. I won't go out with people if that's how they're going to act
I told her that if she was willing to pay for a phone like hers I'd take it. But, if I had to pay for it, no thanks. My cell phone bill is only $23.30 a mo. with unlimited minutes and unlimited long distance here in the US. Why would I want to pay more just to have something to carry around in my purse in case I need it? My little flip phone has GPS and all that I need for emergencies on the road. I also have a charger in my car in case I get stuck out on the road and need to charge the phone. Other than that, what else do I need? If I can't get a signal, Internet is not going to help me. And I totally dislike the whole texting thing.
My cell phone is for my convenience away from home when the need arises, not for everyone and their Mother to call me at their convenience just to chit chat or exercise their texting fingers. Especially, when the expense is on my dime.
Don't read this, RW. LOL
Android and Iphones all come with built in wifi. So I can post my photos of my fishing trip next month
My Granddaughter re-programmed my old MS tablet into thinking it is an Android, and now it won't play my Angry Birds anymore.
Tell her to fix it!
I'm sorry to hear about your mom
I'm sorry to READ about your mom
And there is nothing wrong with that Raven. Probably you are better offAl than most.
Ditto that
She tired, but, it won't go back. Since I have no use for it as an android I just gave it to her. She was trying to do me a favor, but, once it was changed it would not change back. She has a need and better uses for it than I do, so it is not a loss.
I too, agree with her. I can't go into details, but I work with at risk kids, and some of the places have a no cell phone policy. At first, they think they are dying, but then many have come back and told me, it was the best thing that ever happened to them! They can go out and play - biking, fishing, hiking, exploring and enjoy just life without the tug back to the "old life".
I try to model good cell behavior with them - I always put it away at mealtimes, when they are talking with me, etc. Kids watch what you DO, not so much what you SAY.
I see kinds that are not even in Kindergarten playing games on their cell phones. What kind of nonsense is that? At first I thought is might be their parents phone, but, when I saw that it actually was the kids' phone I was floored! And we're tasking a full on latest model iPhone! Who is holding these parents' brains to give such young kids that kind of 'toy'? When most of them aren't can't even spell their own name yet.
Why a re some of these emoji's coming out so large? They didn't used to do so. No matter how many times I re-size them, they still come out so big. A new glitch in the system maybe?
I like the large emojis
They are OK, but, they didn't used to be so big. Just curious as to why they are suddenly showing up so large.
Modeling good behavior is what it is all about. If you tell your kids they can't text and you can't get off your phone, why should they listen to you?
Rules at the lake house-no phones at the dinner table, though I agree, we are ont hem far too much the rest of the day also. Our office, due to secuirty concerns put lock boxes in the lobby, and that's where your phone and bluetooth/wireless devices are required to stay.......I've become less dependent on the phone since we intstituted this.
Good for you Gary! If you are away somewhere, disconnect and enjoy for goodness sakes