For Squeaker
16 years ago, my wife and I were looking at property to buy. We spent months looking at different places but one place really struck us as almost perfect. It was heavily wooded, no power, no water, no cable, nothing. Just a 5 acre plot towards the end of a dead end gravel road. No one else had bought any land up there, (and honestly, the gravel road was encroached upon by vines and small birch trees). The asking price? $25,000.00. Almost bought 4 of the lots, but we settled on one. Hired a contractor, told him what we wanted and he gave us a time frame...start to finish, 4 months.
So a month into it, I decided to drive up and see if there was any progress. Power was in, land was leveled for the house, brush had been cleared, but that was about it. Then I heard a cat meowing. I looked around, couldn’t see it. After an hour I gave up, (it was in the brush, which was very thick and I was in shorts and flip flops).
Two weeks later, the contractor called me and asked me to meet him at the property to go over positioning for the well, driveway, etc… While we were talking, I heard that cat again. This time I saw him. Little guy, with a short stubby tail. If I had to guess, he was 6-8 weeks old. How he had survived in the woods, crawling with coyotes and bobcats, I will never know. But, I picked him up and he immediately snuggled up to me, so, being the animal lover that I am, I took him home. I figured we would give him food and water and take him to the shelter so he could be adopted. On the way home, he was all over me, purring, sitting in my lap, etc..
So I get home and I told the wife, “look who I brought for dinner”. She replied, “you’re going to eat a kitten”? We both fell pretty hard for him, he was cute as can be and because of his “meow”, we named him Squeaker. So, we decided to take him to the vet, get his shots, make sure he was healthy and get his boys cut off. He then became part of the family. Playful, full of energy, sprinting from one room to the next. At night, he had to sleep on my legs and when I moved my feet under the blankets? He pounced. Damn cat.
So time passed, we moved into the house and adopted a completely black female cat with green eyes. She took to playing mother to Squeaker since he was still fairly young. They would both go outside and disappear into the brush behind the house, but I was never far away because I knew what lived in those woods and a house cat would stand no chance at all.
One evening in the summer, I couldn’t get Samantha to come in. It was almost midnight and I had the 350 watt magnesium light on in the back...Samantha was chasing moths. I tried to catch her but...yea, she was quick. So I sat down in my recliner to try to wait her out. Squeaker was sleeping on the floor and suddenly jumped into my lap. Then I heard Samantha yowling in pain. I put Squeaker in the bathroom and shut the door, last thing I needed was him getting out. I grabbed my 12 gauge and ran out the back door with the wife right behind me. I could hear something large in the brush moving around, and Samantha crying out. I ran into the bushes and there was a cougar, maybe 130 140 pounds. I aimed and shot more to scare it than kill it, and it ran off. I dropped the 12 gauge and looked for Samantha… I found her, she was still alive, but by the time I got her into the house and threw on a pair of jeans, she was gone. I have a tat of her on my leg and we had her cremated. She still to this day sits on the mantle above the wood stove. I noticed in the following days that Squeaker wasn’t himself. He missed her, as we all did, she was a beautiful and loving cat. When I was sick and going through all of my surgeries, she never left my side, neither did Squeaker.
More time passed and we adopted another black female cat. Amy is small and very skittish. She isn’t a lap cat and prefers to be left alone. Squeaker took her under his wing and played the father figure, to this day, she is her own cat, doing as she pleases. Then we adopted another cat.. Kit Kat… (He has an interesting story as well….but for another time). He’s a big boy, 21 pounds...and not sure why, but he thinks he is a lap cat. Again, Squeaker played the roll of father and taught him how to hunt, how to smell the air before going outside and how to hide when trouble is near.
We have had these three for a long time. Kit Kat is the youngest at 7 years old, Amy is 11 and Squeaker is 15. Amy is still skittish, Kit Kat is still….rambunctious and eats like a fricking horse. Squeaker… Well… That’s why I am writing this, dear reader.
Last Summer, I noticed that Squeaker wasn’t as active as he had been. So I took him to the vet and she said he was in great health, could stand to lose a few pounds and he was getting older, slowing down was to be expected. I put him on a diet and I was shocked that he lost a whole pound over two months, (hey, for a 14 pound cat, that’s a lot). He was a little more active but, he was still showing his age. The vet assured me there was nothing to worry about, that he was quite healthy.
You see, to me, pets are family, not just, “an animal that I allow to live with me”. They mean a lot to me because they never act out in sheer petulance. They don’t hate you because you had a shitty day, they don’t get mad or complain because you are a [insert political party here]. All they do is love you no matter what. Squeaker has a habit of coming up to me and putting a paw on my leg when he needs something. Usually soft food, or a treat, or he just wants to be petted. If I go for a walk, he always goes with me. If I am mowing the lawn, he will watch me from the window. He loves to have his tummy rubbed and right under his chin.
About three months ago, I noticed Squeaker had lost some weight but I was trying to watch how much he ate. To be on the safe side, I took him to the vet and she said that he had lost 2 pounds. She told me to get him off the diet and let him eat. Well, he didn’t. He lost more weight. So she gave me something to help his appetite and he did start to eat a little more, but still he lost weight. I took him back to the vet and she looked him over, poked and prodded and then she looked at me, (she has been the only vet Squeaker has seen for the last 15 years), and she said… “Squeaker has cancer, I can feel the lumps in his tummy, that’s why he has been losing weight”. “Is there anything we can do?” “I examined him a month ago, this cancer is very aggressive, I am so sorry.”
She gave me some medications to keep him comfortable and told me to take him home. She said if I needed anything to call, day or night. I asked if I should just be merciful and put him to sleep. She said that he had lived in one home all his life, let him go on his terms. Over the last two weeks, I have watched him slowly deteriorate, lose so much weight that he is literally skin and bones. He is so weak I have to carry him to the litter box so he can do his business. He still eats, but it’s very little, a few bites here and there but he still drinks lots of water. I have literally put everything on the back burner to make sure he is comfortable, and well loved. It’s been incredibly hard for me and I post here on NT as more of a distraction. I try to be upbeat but the reality is that this has been difficult. As some of you know, I lost my wife at the end of last year, so I have had all the loss I can handle, now Squeaker is going to go as well? Who then will I have? Amy and Kit Kat. I don’t talk to my family, my kids are grown and have their own lives. This just seems cruel to me, but at least I can make Squeakers journey to endless fields of grass, a beach and all the mice he can eat, a good one.
I get it, he is a cat, but has also been a best friend for 15 years. He has always been there. When a neighbor suggested I have him put to sleep, I said, “Why? He has given me 15 years of friendship, don’t I owe it to be there for him in the last few weeks of his life? To let him know how much he means to me? To allow him to go on his own terms no matter what he needs”? So he has accidents...I can clean it up. He can’t jump up or down on his favorite chair, or onto my lap...I can pick him up, look him in the eyes and let him know that I am there for him. After all he has given me? I owe him that.
So there it is. Today he had a hard time going number two, so I went to the vet and got something to help him out and….wow, it worked. I gave him his pain med, gave him his favorite soft food and fresh water. He is on his bed, not moving, looking out the window like he has done for so many years, at the birds. I know it’s a matter of time...a week or two at the most, and I will be there for him at the end, I know he would do it for me.
Squeaker, I love you and this is for you my friend.
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I will add a few pictures here and there.
Squeaker and Amy napping on a chair.
Squeaker yesterday afternoon...
Hang in there as best you can.
Thanks Sister, I am trying.
Sorry to hear the bad news. I like cats. My youngest daughter always had one growing up. They are clean, quiet, no problem.
Like you say they are always there for you.
Thanks Vic.
I am so sorry to hear about your buddy, Squeaker. I had a similar situation with my cat Bud. E. who had kidney failure.I let him rest until he could no longer go on. You will know when the time is right. You love baby the most. Enjoy him and love him for the time you have together.
His vet favors keeping him comfortable and letting him pass on his own, in the only home he has ever known. She said that putting him to sleep is an option but she finds it cruel because the last thing they know is a cold steel table and a needle. Her opinion of course, but I just couldn't do it to him. So, I keep him comfortable, give him what he wants and let him be. He can't walk more than a few feet and only takes a few bites of food.
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I'll keep this open until Squeaker says good bye.
We don't say goodbye to all the people we know, sometimes and eventually they say goodbye to us. But we do usually have to say goodbye to all of our animals at some point. Squeaker has been a great friend to you and did his thing in this world exactly as he was meant to do. He will live on in your memory of him.
True. I already know where the tat is going as well. Thanks John.
I think this was after surgery #6...I don't actually remember it as I was on a LOT of pain meds at the time....but there is Squeaker.
Thank you for sharing the story of Squeaker. You and he have had an incredible journey together. It sounds like he has been well loved and has loved you back in every way he knows how. I'm sorry your journey together is coming to an end.
Take the time you need with Squeaker. The most precious time you can give is with those you love at the end of their days. It's a comfort to him that you are there.
He is beautiful.
I know it is hard but I agree with the vet. Let him live out his time in his home where he is loved.
It is very hard Ender...very very hard.
I'm sorry about what Squeaker is going through Frosty. The bonds we develop with our furry children run deep and it just doesn't seem fair that they live such short lives. Stay strong and give him a tummy rub for me.
I am told that 15 years is a good long life for a cat and he has been well cared for, he has had a good life, just tough to watch him deteriorate so quickly... And rub given, thanks Greg.
It is, just doesn't ever seem to feel like it was long enough.
Amen to that.
So sorry about your kitty ! He looks really sweet, kinda like a Maine Coon. Pets are family !
That's exactly what he is.
I have a cat that is half Maine Coon. I read that this breed's life expectancy is right around 15 years. So glad you got to enjoy him all this time.
OMG the word "Coon" is blanked out in my comment on the FP. This is ridiculous !
Oops sorry about that. The algorithm just looks for keywords that could be offensive.
Wuz gonna say the same.
Frosty - three days ago, we had to put our favorite, "Wolfie", down for a sudden onslaught of cancer in his stomach. He was 13. Sadly, last year, almost to the day, we had to put his sister down - due to cancer of the head - she was 13. Today, our "oldest", Xyna, is starting to show the same signs - she's 14.
Hurt??? You betcha, but all three of them have given us tremendous love and comfort and, I think I can truthfully say, as you, we gave them all we had.
(Top - Xyna (black/white), Middle - Wolfie (Calico), Bottom - Poupon (Calico).
I am really sorry for your loss. It hurts like hell. Three boxes of kleenex in 2 weeks.. It just sucks.
Sorry to hear about the bad news 1st. We all love our kitties.
So sorry to hear about Squeaker
Thanks Lady, it's been a tough road for sure.
I know how hard this is for you and Squeaker...saying goodbye is so hard.
He is so weak I have to carry him to the litter box so he can do his business... just a suggestion to maybe make it a bit easier for both of you, move his box closer to where he's most comfortable.
I get it, he is a cat, but has also been a best friend for 15 years
Thanks for those Uppy!
Sad news.
Sorry to hear it.
I'm sorry Squeaker isn't doing well. I've had cats and lost cats, and it always hurts. Nothing like having a cat purring on your lap or lying next to you in bed to help you relax. I've never understood people who say cats are aloof. They tell us that they love us. We just have to listen in their language. Sounds like you and Squeaker understand each other.
Yea we do...I think anyway. I know his habits and what he likes. So I just try to give him what he likes.
Aww, how sweet, touching, and sad.
I, too, had a Squeaker (named for the same reason). She passed away years ago, at age 18. The vet said she was in no pain, her system was just shutting down. I went to sleep one night with her sleeping on my stomach; when I woke up, she was in a coma, and was gone in a few hours. The little girls next door came over when I was burying her, and turned what would have been a sad, lonely burial into the kind of funeral little kids give their pets. I was laughing as much as crying, thanks to them.
The pain of losing them is worth the love we give them and receive from them, but it still hurts.
Very well said Katrix! Thanks!
Sorry to hear he isn't doing well.
Little buggers worm their way into our hearts and never let go.
Enjoy his company while you can.
Isn't that the truth. It's why I have four cats instead of two - before I could find homes for the last two kittens a stray had, they had wormed their way into my heart. Pantera woke me up this morning by licking my nose - there's no way I could give those two up now.
Yeah, they are sneaky that way.
I thought it was funny that you used the exact phrase I use when I explain to people why I kept Pantera and Slayer!
Ain't that the truth. I was always a dog person but after I divorced my x and remarried...we'll, ran into Squeaker...now I am a cat person, big time. Thanks for the post Sparty.
No worries, we feel ya. I bet most of us here have had pets like that.
I grew up with cats and dogs so i've always liked both. Almost all of them strays and rescues.
I'm of the mind that there are no bad pets. Only bad pet owners
Exactly right.
Dear MrFrost,
I am so very sorry to hear about Squeaker's illness. It is never easy to say good-bye to a member of our family, be they 2 legged or 4 legged. I have had many fur babies during my life, and it was very hard to see them walk on.
Like you, to me they are more than mere animals, they are family. My Yoda Girl is 9 y/o this year. I hate seeing her getting older, as I know there will come the time to say good-bye to her as well. The love and companionship she has given me over the years is priceless.
But, I know that there are all my other fur babies who have gone before her who will be there to greet her when it is time for her to cross over the Rainbow Bridge. And she, and they, will be there to greet me when it is my turn.
Your love and care of Squeaker as his time here with you draws near, will bring you peace of mind knowing that you did all you could to give him a life of happiness to the very end.
I'm so sorry about your Squeaker. I just lost my Midnight last month, he was 15, he lived longer than any cat I've ever had. He was a pain in my ass in the end, peeing at will. But he loved me like no other living creature and I miss him terribly, pee pads and all (try doing that when you are selling your house!). I ended up having a vet come to my house instead of making him leave the only home he knew and loved (he hated leaving). Cost me a fortune, but worth every cent. I still miss him.
I am sorry for your loss, Lib... Yea, he has a hard time peeing. I take him to the litter box every couple of hours but, I gotta sleep too. He tries, but he can't walk far or fast.
Sorry my picture didn't come through (at least I can't see it now), but our pets really do become such a part of our lives. You are living the most difficult part now, knowing when the 'right time' is. All the best to you during this difficult time.
Thanks Lib
Is ok, no worries.
My Bosco lived to be 18. He had a hard time using the litter near the end.
I never regret having him at home during his last days.
The hardest part was finding him one morning. I am old school and most of my pets are buried in the back yard. Another hard thing to do.
I guess my point is, even though it was painful for me at the end, it was worth it for the eighteen colourful years I had with him (one year he decided to climb up inside the Christmas tree, ended up knocking it over) and the wonderful memories.
I wish I could say something worthwhile or have some words of wisdom yet at times like these I draw a blank. There is nothing I could say to make anything better or easier.
So the only thing I can do from my little corner of this world is give Mr Frost a big cyber bro hug. : )
Hope you don't mind because I am giving you one anyway...
(((MrFrost)))
Thanks man, it's appreciated. If I had to guess, it will be less than a week now. He is extremely weak.
mrfrost, I totally understand how you feel right now. We're exclusively "catophiles" and have buried a number of them over the decades. Squeaker looks comfortable although with animals it's always hard to tell whether and how much they're in pain or not--stoicism is their lot. In fact, that stoicism probably led us to wait a bit too long to make that final trip to the vet with our female, also a stray, who as a kitten began following Mrs. Atheist (she's not, btw--atheist, I mean) and the kids when they were on a walk nearly 20 years(!) earlier. In a matter of a couple of hours she went from being merely slow but still ambulatory to being tottering and unable to stay on her paws for more than a few steps. And, she was literally wasting away before our eyes. It turned out to be a rush to the vet to end her obvious suffering by that time. We've always regretted the delay. Not offering any advice. Everyone's sitch is different. Just sayin'.
Sail on gently into the sunset, Squeaker!
Excellent post my friend. As far as religion goes...you know me, Deist, as close to an atheist as one can get. Squeaker is at the wobbly gait stage, he is ambulatory, but barely. Yea, then I wake up this morning and somehow, he was able to get behind my TV/entertainment center that weighs a billion tons. Had to call my neighbor to come over and get him out of there, (she is 4'10", 90 pounds...no way my big ass could get back there to get him).
He seems to feel ok, not in much pain, he just has a hard time getting around. He is well medicated. But your point is well taken.
Welllll......maybe but still not all that close
A conversation for another time Buddy..
Sorry about your friend, they bring us much happiness and you are taking care of him
Charger, Bo dog and Bailey puppy
Thanks Charger.
Time for my feel good 88 story again.
When a former gf’s grandpa passed on he had a cat that no one in their family wanted. Me being a big old softy she knew she could pawn it off on me. Her grandpa was a cool dude. Old Calvary guy .... yeah the real four legged Cav. He pissed everyone in their family off when he gave me his saddle. A very prized possession. Anyway we got along great so out of respect for him I took the cat. She was pretty traumatized because he couldn’t take very good care of her in his waning years.
So I bring her north to my home, he lived about 200 miles away. I kept her in the house for couple weeks so she knew this was home and didn’t take a 200 mile walkabout as soon as I let her out. I watched her close the first I let her out. She seemed fine so i went about yard work. It wasn’t five minutes later she prances up with a Bluejay flopping around in her mouth. I knew then and there we were going to get along great.
Incidently, he named her 88, the year she was born, so he wouldn’t have to guess what age she was. Classic for him. She lived over 16 years and wacked many a bird, chipmunk and mole. Great cat ..... I still miss her.
That's a fantastic story, thanks man!
Just an update:
Squeaker is still hanging in there, he doesn't seem to be in any pain. He has not eaten anything is three days but still drinks water. He can't walk at all now, because he has no energy. Going to lock the article because I am not sure I am coming back to the site.
Squeaker died at 11:41pm, 6/22/19. I noticed he was very lethargic this afternoon, he had stopped drinking water around 2pm today, so I wrapped him in a blanket and held him until he passed away. I am having him cremated.
May the winds always be at your back Squeaker, I love you.
Thanks to all that commented. It's appreciated.
I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I hope the pain in your heart will be eased by the beautiful memories you have of Squeaker.
Frosty - my heart and mind are with you. Squeaker knew your love and devotion and gave back in return. Cherish that time.
Squeaker is now in the loving hands of the Creator. Until you meet again, his love and spirit will be with you.
nv-wa-do-hi-ya-dv (Peace)
I'm sorry, Mr. Frost. I'm glad you were holding him until the end. He knew he was loved.
Sorry MrFrost.
I'm so sorry about you the loss of your fur baby, Squeaker. I know no words will console you now, but Squeaker knew you loved him, at home and that is a gift.
Thank you, it does sting a bit.
Going to lock this for now, but there is one more update to be done. Later this week.
Well, I did find a picture of Kit-Kat.... 22 pounds...hard to believe there is only one cat laying there. He's fine, just went out to survey his territory and undoubtedly pee on as many things as he can.
To all that posted on this article, you have my thanks and gratitude.
Now we have come full circle. Took a week to get Squeaker through the cremation process. I picked him up on Tuesday but I have been busy, so I have put this off until I have a bit more time.
I took him to the vets office first thing Monday morning so they could handle the cremation. I had no idea that there is a pet crematorium in the local area. I asked for the "single pet" cremation, the paw prints and the necklace. For those that may not be aware... You can opt for a "group cremation", (it's ok, I too laughed when I heard the gal say it), or the, "single pet" cremation. The later is self explanatory, the other is far cheaper, but includes the ashes of all the other pets that were cremated with your pet as well. The paw print, "plaque", has his prints and his name imprinted, just hard to see in the picture. I know an artist and I am debating on having her paint it is Squeakers fur color.
So that's that. Again, thank you all.
I missed this article when it was posted. I was on vacation for a couple of weeks.
So sorry to hear of Squeakers cancer MrFrost.
Give him a hug as he passes.
Some time in the future you'll met again at the Rainbow Bridge.
Thanks! He was a good critter, the house seems a little more empty without him.