Scores of angry Canadians explode after being told they can't get cheap smokes on reserves amid Covid-19 pandemic - Walking Eagle News
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When they are too full of shit to fly.
S E E D E D C O N T E N T
December 1, 2021
Hundreds of angry Canadians have spontaneously combusted after learning they're no longer allowed to go on reserves and purchase discount cigarettes or fuel because of the global Covid-19 pandemic.
"You have to understand, being told we're not allowed to go somewhere — even if it means spreading harmful disease — is like TNT to us," said Lily LeBlanc, a spokesperson for Canadians.
"We must have access to these Indigenous communities and their limited resources or we'll all blow up."
It's not just fuel and tobacco purchases causing the angry Canadian explosions either.
Other Indigenous communities are reporting an influx of angry Canadians blowing up after being told they can't go looking to fish, drive off-road vehicles, or appropriate culture like vacuums.
However, researchers are trying to determine how those who spontaneously combusted still had time to go on social media and post racist diatribes beforehand.
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Explosions have been reported as far west as Vancouver BC and north to Prince Rupert.
This is a very dangerous situation, many First Nations people have taken cover in their bomb bunkers when some Canadians explode the shit flies everywhere says Chief Louis Riel IV of the Metis Nation.
I saw this happen during the Oka wars the shit flew everywhere said, Chief Louis Riel.
looks like the NA karma pendulum is finally starting it's swing back...
LOL, boom, look out.
Why yes!
I guess they'll have to just roll their own, eh?
A turd in toilet paper. Plenty of methane to make that smoke.
That's a shame dontcha know.
heartbreaking.
You think EOD will help?
I've heard only headshots will work. At a reasonable distance of course.
Don't want a splatter pattern on ya.
Absolutely, these might just be work boots but I don't want to have to replace them.
Not a chance, the fuse is lit and the Canadians are on fire so to speak.
It's about time! Great news! (grin)
There goes about 75% of the Indian smoke shop profits.
Nope, they are just shipping them across the Medicine line.
LOL. What IS it that the First Nation people are putting in those cigarettes? Good thing I gave up smoking (tobacco) 4 decades ago, and never smoked more than half a pack a day at most.
They are spiking the cigarettes with sage, yup it's true and that gives the smoker a sense of calm.
But Merriam-Webster says this:
So why would they do that?
Sage is one of the four sacred herbs to Native Americans, Buzz.
The article is satire.
Which is why I answered the way I did. The other three are tobacco, cedar and sweetgrass.
They would do that to calm the Chimooks down and mellow them out which many do need.
To coin a phrase, "You're not just whistling Dixie". (Oh, wait, maybe that song has the forbidden words Robert E Lee in it.)
I was a light smoker many Grandmothers ago, when there were few, if any, filter cigarettes. I really didn't like the taste of the things, but, it was the 'in' thing to do at that time. I tried Peyote once, and only the once, but, never tried the sage. After trying the Peyote I quit smoking completely. No sense pushing my luck. (big grin)
The smoking lamp is lit .... smoke em if ya got em