What's in it for me? It's time to shelve selfishness for selflessness

  
Via:  Bob Nelson  •  2 weeks ago  •  25 comments

By:   Bernard J. Rabik (The Times)

What's in it for me? It's time to shelve selfishness for selflessness



It's hard to think about selflessness when we are struggling.

Selflessness is the surest route to inner peace and a meaningful life.

Selflessness heals the self.

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The pandemic is far stronger than any one of us.

We can win together , or we can lose.



S E E D E D   C O N T E N T





Justin Turner, third baseman of the World Series-winning Dodgers
, was abruptly removed in Game 6 because he tested positive for the coronavirus. There is something strange and disquieting about trying to parse just how hard his employers tried to restrict an infectious 35-year-old man from going where he wanted on the day that his team won the World Series. But no more strange and disquieting than the more expansive, serious reality of a country besieged by a pandemic that has killed nearly a quarter of a million people.

384 Bernard J. Rabik For The Times

The real reason the celebratory scene in Arlington, Texas, after the Dodgers won the World Series was so surreal and upsetting was because Justin Turner, a real person, chose to knowingly expose other real people — his teammates, coaches, their families and support staff — to a potentially deadly virus. He knew the stakes and the toll and the situation clearly. Doing the right thing would have been a bummer, an eternal source of wistfulness for Turner, who certainly deserved to celebrate with the team he helped lead to a championship.

Unfortunately, the coronavirus cares not for what you deserve.

Time and time again, however, we're reminded that human society is so much worse than we ever imagine. People don't care about each other. At least not more than they care about someone else's salary and healthcare more than they care about their own growing expendable income. It's not just corporations that can be callous. People will endanger others to their face.

The New York Times opinion columnist Paul Krugman has written: "The cult of selfishness is killing America." There's a deeper explanation of the profoundly self-destructive behavior of President Trump and his allies: They are all members of America's cult of selfishness. But the point is that Trump has normalized selfishness.

As a nation, we've lost our sense of altruistic and moral purpose, a collective will to do what is decent and right — "other-regarding."

We as Americans have a fundamental right to disagree. We do not have the right to trample on others' property, health, thought processes or social well-being.

It's true. It's hard to think about selflessness when we are struggling. Selflessness is the surest route to inner peace and a meaningful life. Selflessness heals the self.

We must seek to leave a place cleaner than we found it, people happier than we found them, the world better than we find it. We have come not to take but to receive.

The vices and virtues of the people at large matter enormously; for leadership is the art of the possible, and possibility is determined by whether generosity can triumph over selfishness in the American soul.

Nicole Weiss and David Rhoades' wedding plans took an abrupt turn on July 31 when Weiss was diagnosed with a brain tumor.

Weiss is battling Stage 4 glioma, a rare mutation of a cancerous tumor. Though it isn't curable, doctors hope to slow its progression. Weiss is undergoing treatment at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minn. High school sweethearts, Weiss, 28, and Rhoades, 29, had been planning to marry in spring 2021.

"When we found out about my diagnosis, I thought, 'Why have we waited so long? Let's just get married.' We been together 11 years," Weiss said.

The first night she was hospitalized after Rhoades won his fight with hospital staff to let him stay in Weiss' room amid COVID restrictions, they hatched a plan to marry sooner.

"We're more in love than we are scared," he said. "We said, 'Let's do it.'"

Although Weiss has switched to a Keto diet based on nutritionists' recommendations, she splurged on her Oct. 18 wedding day. They picked a menu of beer-braised beef with garlic mashed potatoes and rice pilaf and seasonal salad. She said, "During this cancer treatment I've cut out all carbs and sugar, but I said, 'It's my wedding day. I'm going to eat whatever I want. I'm going to eat the cake!'"

No selfishness between them. They both have come not to take but to give.

Selfishness is everywhere. The elite progressives, right-wing conservatives and everyone else in the mix are selfish. It is damaging to people and our democracy. Let's all take time to think about how to change our own selfish behavior before attacking others.

Bernard J. Rabik, a Hopewell Township attorney, is an opinion columnist for The Times.



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Bob Nelson
1  seeder  Bob Nelson    2 weeks ago

Greed is NOT good.

Egotism kills.

 
 
 
Perrie Halpern R.A.
1.1  Perrie Halpern R.A.  replied to  Bob Nelson @1    2 weeks ago

This isn't about greed. It's about selfishness. You could even argue it's about putting your wants first or being self-centered. 

 
 
 
Bob Nelson
1.1.1  seeder  Bob Nelson  replied to  Perrie Halpern R.A. @1.1    2 weeks ago

Yes. 

 
 
 
Tacos!
2  Tacos!    2 weeks ago
Justin Turner, a real person, chose to knowingly expose other real people — his teammates, coaches, their families and support staff — to a potentially deadly virus. He knew the stakes and the toll and the situation clearly.

Actually, this is not a fair depiction of the event .

First of all, both Turner and the rest of the team had reason to think his test result might well have been a false positive, but even it weren't, it was logical to assume that they had all been exposed already since they had already been spending all of their time together for so long in the baseball bubble. Here is the reaction from Kike Hernandez :

I learned about what happened to   Justin [Turner]   in   Game 6   right away because I saw Andrew Friedman in the dugout, and I asked myself, “What is happening here?” That’s when they told me J.T. tested positive, and my first reaction was like, “What? How does that happen if we’re inside a bubble?”

In a situation like this, we do not want any player making these judgment calls on their own. It was MLB's responsibility to take appropriate steps to protect everyone on the field. Turner is not the expert on when or how to isolate. Once taken off the field, MLB took no action to make sure he remained isolated.

Turner did not simply force himself onto the field. His teammates urged him to go onto the field and team staff made no move to prevent it. He actually resisted going out there. When he did finally go out, he wore a mask, except for some photos where he wasn't really in a position to be expelling virus-laden droplets onto people.

Since then, exactly zero other players on the field have tested positive and MLB has no idea how Turner contracted the virus.

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One of the shittier aspects of this event is the way MLB allowed Justin to be thrown under the bus. Typical for the way the commissioner's office runs these days.

 
 
 
Bob Nelson
2.1  seeder  Bob Nelson  replied to  Tacos! @2    2 weeks ago

You're agreeing with the seed. 

Greed is good! "When in doubt, do what's best for you ... and if you try hard you can probably find 'doubt' just about anywhere..." 

 
 
 
Tacos!
2.1.1  Tacos!  replied to  Bob Nelson @2.1    2 weeks ago

Where do you see greed ?

 
 
 
Bob Nelson
2.1.2  seeder  Bob Nelson  replied to  Tacos! @2.1.1    2 weeks ago

You're joking, right? 

 
 
 
Tacos!
2.1.3  Tacos!  replied to  Bob Nelson @2.1.2    2 weeks ago

So you don't have an answer. Just hate.

 
 
 
Bob Nelson
2.1.4  seeder  Bob Nelson  replied to  Tacos! @2.1.3    2 weeks ago

Hate? 

wow.... 

 
 
 
Tacos!
2.1.5  Tacos!  replied to  Bob Nelson @2.1.4    2 weeks ago

Whatever. I still see nothing.

 
 
 
Bob Nelson
2.1.6  seeder  Bob Nelson  replied to  Tacos! @2.1.5    2 weeks ago
 I still see nothing.

Exactly. 

That's the problem. 

 
 
 
Tacos!
2.1.7  Tacos!  replied to  Bob Nelson @2.1.6    2 weeks ago

From you. Nothing from you. 

I gave a substantive, factual comment on the seed. All you have done is give these ridiculous jabs.

But keep playing the childish game. It reflects on you, not me.

 
 
 
Bob Nelson
2.1.8  seeder  Bob Nelson  replied to  Tacos! @2.1.7    2 weeks ago

You gave "alternative facts". I gave them the consideration they deserve. 

 
 
 
Perrie Halpern R.A.
2.1.9  Perrie Halpern R.A.  replied to  Bob Nelson @2.1.8    2 weeks ago

Bob,

I am going to take Tacos's side in this. He gave a different reporting of what happened. 

In a situation like this, we do not want any player making these judgment calls on their own. It was MLB's responsibility to take appropriate steps to protect everyone on the field. Turner is not the expert on when or how to isolate. Once taken off the field, MLB took no action to make sure he remained isolated.

The fault falls plainly on the MLB. It was not Turner's call. He is just the scapegoat.

 
 
 
Bob Nelson
2.1.10  seeder  Bob Nelson  replied to  Perrie Halpern R.A. @2.1.9    2 weeks ago

He knew he was infected. He chose to spend time with his teammates. He put lots of people at risk. 

His choice.

 
 
 
Texan1211
2.1.11  Texan1211  replied to  Bob Nelson @2.1.10    2 weeks ago

Turner did NOT play after finding out he tested positive.

THAT is why they PULLED him from the game, because MLB got the test results.

 
 
 
Tacos!
2.1.12  Tacos!  replied to  Bob Nelson @2.1.8    2 weeks ago
You gave "alternative facts"

No, I gave you actual, documented, sourced facts. Maybe you think the Los Angeles Times is a partisan right-wing rag. 

 
 
 
Tacos!
2.1.13  Tacos!  replied to  Bob Nelson @2.1.10    2 weeks ago
He knew he was infected. He chose to play.

Please provide proof for this fiction.

 
 
 
Bob Nelson
2.1.14  seeder  Bob Nelson  replied to  Tacos! @2.1.13    2 weeks ago

Sitting to the left of the trophy.... 

original

 
 
 
Tacos!
2.1.15  Tacos!  replied to  Bob Nelson @2.1.14    2 weeks ago

Great. Just like I said (it would be great if you read the comments you dismiss). You caught him briefly removing his mask for a photo with the team. Others in the shot are doing the same thing. He's also sitting in front where he won't be breathing into someone else.

Do you understand all these people had been living in a bubble for weeks? They had every reason to think that either Turner's test was flawed, or they were all just as infected as he was and so either way it didn't matter. Do you understand also that the group wanted this? There was no individual greed on the part of Turner (who, by the way, very much earned this trophy - maybe more than anyone else on the team.) 

 
 
 
Perrie Halpern R.A.
2.1.16  Perrie Halpern R.A.  replied to  Bob Nelson @2.1.10    2 weeks ago
His choice.

He works for an organization. They make the call, not him.

 
 
 
Bob Nelson
2.1.17  seeder  Bob Nelson  replied to  Perrie Halpern R.A. @2.1.16    2 weeks ago

Seriously? 

Joining an organization transfers personal moral responsibility to the organization? 

Seriously? 

 
 
 
Texan1211
2.1.18  Texan1211  replied to  Tacos! @2.1.13    2 weeks ago

There simply is no evidence to support that fiction.

 
 
 
MUVA
3  MUVA    2 weeks ago

Greed is in the eye of the beholder. When you sit on line all day and judge others about the wealth they accumulate MAYBE THE TIME WOULD BE BETTER SPENT WORKING.Altruism isn't something you do with others money you have to spend your own money or you are just being a judgmental virtue signaling cheapskate.   

 
 
 
Perrie Halpern R.A.
3.1  Perrie Halpern R.A.  replied to  MUVA @3    2 weeks ago

This is about spreading a virus and not about money. No one has the right to make the decision for someone else about a disease. Remember AIDS? I remember very little tolerance for anyone who spread that disease around before they had treatment. In fact, even in the face of knowledge, people would avoid the infected. I don't want to be infected by this because someone decided not to take precautions. 

 
 
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