Ketanji Brown Jackson Up All Night Reading Biology Textbooks Trying To Figure Out What Everybody Means By 'Women's' Right To Abortion

  

Category:  Satire

Via:  gregtx  •  2 months ago  •  10 comments

Ketanji Brown Jackson Up All Night Reading Biology Textbooks Trying To Figure Out What Everybody Means By 'Women's' Right To Abortion
WASHINGTON, D.C., US - Leaked reports indicate that Supreme Court Justice Ketanji Brown-Jackson spent all Monday night poring over biology textbooks to learn what a woman is so she could defend a woman's right to abortion on Tuesday.'When the 'Liberal Justices Only' group text message became all about 'women's right to abo ...

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WASHINGTON, D.C., US—Leaked reports indicate that Supreme Court Justice Ketanji Brown-Jackson spent all Monday night poring over biology textbooks to learn what a woman is so she could defend a woman's right to abortion on Tuesday.

"When the 'Liberal Justices Only' group text message became all about 'women's right to abortion,' I knew I had to learn what a woman is—by becoming a bona fide biologist," Justice Brown-Jackson shared with reporters early Tuesday morning. Eyewitnesses described Brown-Jackson as having a chewed-up pencil behind her ear and looking bleary-eyed during her statement. "Even after hours of cramming, I'm no closer—I couldn't even pick 10 women out of this lineup of reporters!"

Inside sources have confirmed that Jackson-Brown took repeated trips to the Supreme Court's Keurig coffee maker in the break room, and confided to the janitor in her frustration: "I got into this business to commute the sentences of pedophiles! Why would I need to know scientific jargon about XX and XY chromosomes? I'm not a biologist!"

At publishing time, Justice Brown Jackson had recused herself from further involvement in Roe V. Wade or "women's issues" since she still could not define "woman." She was last seen staring at a wall and drooling from the mental exhaustion.


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GregTx
Junior Participates
1  seeder  GregTx    2 months ago

jrSmiley_10_smiley_image.gif

 
 
 
Vic Eldred
Professor Principal
1.1  Vic Eldred  replied to  GregTx @1    2 months ago

What an ass she is.

 
 
 
XXJefferson51
Senior Guide
1.1.1  XXJefferson51  replied to  Vic Eldred @1.1    2 months ago

That’s for sure!  

 
 
 
Texan1211
Professor Principal
2  Texan1211    2 months ago

Time to cue the usual crowd's nonsense:

It isn't funny! It isn't satire! Make it stop!

 
 
 
Sean Treacy
Professor Expert
3  Sean Treacy    2 months ago

Funny how women suddenly exist for the Democrats again.

 
 
 
bugsy
Professor Participates
3.1  bugsy  replied to  Sean Treacy @3    2 months ago

"Birthing people" when they want them to have children, "women" when they want them to abort their children.

 
 
 
JohnRussell
Professor Principal
4  JohnRussell    2 months ago

www.mediaite.com   /opinion/here-it-is-the-worst-take-about-the-leaked-supreme-court-opinion/

Here It Is – The Worst Take About the Supreme Court Leak

michael-luciano 2-2 minutes   5/3/2022


Screen-Shot-2022-05-03-at-2.51.06-PM.jpghttps://am14.mediaite.com/med/cnt/uploads/2022/05/Screen-Shot-2022-05-03-at-2.51.06-PM-300x166.jpg 300w, 1200w, 768w" sizes="(max-width: 1244px) 100vw, 1244px" >

Bad takes from across the political spectrum began rolling in on Monday night shortly after Politico   published   a leaked draft of the Supreme Court’s opinion in   Dobbs v. Jackson Women’s Health , which would overturn   Roe v. Wade   and   Planned Parenthood v. Casey .

Some liberals, such as MSNBC host   Joy Reid , have cast the decision as a step toward a real-life   Gilead , the dystopian successor state to the U.S. in   The Handmaid’s Tale   that practices the mass torture and rape of women in order to perpetuate the population.

[ deleted ]

 
 
 
GregTx
Junior Participates
4.1  seeder  GregTx  replied to  JohnRussell @4    2 months ago

Why are you posting an article as a comment to my article?

 
 
 
Jeremy Retired in NC
PhD Guide
4.1.1  Jeremy Retired in NC  replied to  GregTx @4.1    2 months ago

To make it better, it's an opinion piece.

 
 
 
Sunshine
Professor Guide
5  Sunshine    2 months ago

Remember to tell your Mother "Happy Birthing Person Day" this Sunday.

 
 

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