I know we’ve called every Conservative Leader for the last 7 years a right-wing extremist, but this time we mean it

  

Category:  Satire

Via:  hallux  •  6 days ago  •  17 comments

By:   LUKE GORDON FIELD - The Beaverton

I know we’ve called every Conservative Leader for the last 7 years a right-wing extremist, but this time we mean it

S E E D E D   C O N T E N T



By   Justin Trudeau

As you know The Conservative Party of Canada has selected   Pierre Poilievre   as their new Party Leader. Unfortunately I have to warn you that Mr. Poilievre is a dangerous right-wing ideologue who is far too extreme to govern our country. And while I said that exact same thing about Erin O’Toole,   Andrew Scheer   and   Stephen Harper , this time I’m super serious.

Mr. Poilievre has no regard for our values of multiculturalism, of pluralism and respect. He caters only to the fringe elements in his own party and associates with the very worst of the worst. Also the milk thing is a bit weird. Wait sorry, scratch that. That was leftover from when I copy and pasted this paragraph from a previous speech I gave about Andrew Scheer.

His statements about the trucker convoy alone should disqualify him. The fact that he stood shoulder to shoulder with people who waived the swastika and terrorized local communities should guarantee that no Canadian votes for Mr. Harper. I mean Mr. O’Toole. Fuck!

Ok, so maybe we’ve run the ‘dangerous ideologue’ playbook before. And at the time that seemed fair. But now Scheer and O’Toole seem kinda cute in comparison to Poilievre. I mean, sure Erin O’Toole kinda came off like a guy who gets in fist fights in Tim Horton’s parking lots, but he wasn’t going to try to unilaterally fire the Governor of the Bank of Canada! He was even going to basically keep my carbon tax.

It seems we were a bit quick to judgment before. I admit it now. But this time you have to trust us. We’re like the Boy Who Cried Wolf. And if memory serves when the wolf actually arrived all the villagers helped the Boy save the sheep right? That’s how I taught it to my students anyway.

So when you start seeing ads talking about Pierre Poilievre being a conservative zealot who will govern like Donald Trump, take them seriously. And don’t worry about the fact that they are clearly the same ads we’ve run about O’Toole and Scheer only with Poilievre’s face awkwardly photoshopped in. That was just a budget thing.

Also if we win one more election I promise to come up with a new line of attack for the next Conservative Leader. After all, no way they nominate an even further right-wing guy to replace this one right?


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Hallux
Junior Principal
1  seeder  Hallux    6 days ago

Pierre Poilievre and Ron DeSantis are the twin sons of Anikó Lévai.

 
 
 
Ronin2
Professor Quiet
2  Ronin2    6 days ago

Justin Trudea. A fascist by any other name is still a fascist. At least he is trying to be a funny. Emphasis on the word trying.  He will always be a fascist no matter what.

 
 
 
Hallux
Junior Principal
2.1  seeder  Hallux  replied to  Ronin2 @2    6 days ago

Trudeau did not write the article ... try another comment [Deleted]

 
 
 
Trout Giggles
Professor Principal
2.1.1  Trout Giggles  replied to  Hallux @2.1    6 days ago

Call me stupid if you want but this is Luke Gordon Field using Trudeau's "voice" for his satire, correct?

 
 
 
Ronin2
Professor Quiet
2.1.2  Ronin2  replied to  Hallux @2.1    6 days ago

Trudeau is still a fascist. Nothing you say will change that.

 
 
 
Hallux
Junior Principal
2.1.3  seeder  Hallux  replied to  Ronin2 @2.1.2    6 days ago

He's often an asshole, but a fascist? Definitely not.

 
 
 
squiggy
Sophomore Quiet
2.1.4  squiggy  replied to  Hallux @2.1    6 days ago
when you learn to read

The problem is that you expect others to appreciate your rabbit holes of obscurity. If it's not apparent in three seconds, you can keep it.

 
 
 
Hallux
Junior Principal
2.1.5  seeder  Hallux  replied to  squiggy @2.1.4    6 days ago

Would you like a list of books to help you keep up? Maybe start off with:

1066 and All That: A Memorable History of England, Comprising All the Parts You Can Remember, Including 103 Good Things, 5 Bad Kings and 2 Genuine Dates

There are many American copycat versions:

It All Started With Columbus

or

Dave Barry Slept Here: A Sort of History of the United States  

 
 
 
Buzz of the Orient
Professor Principal
2.1.6  Buzz of the Orient  replied to  Ronin2 @2.1.2    6 days ago
"Trudeau is still a fascist. Nothing you say will change that."

And every liberal is a fascist, right?  Although he's a mere shadow of the Prime Minister his father was, and there is little that I like about him, he's not a fascist, and I think my opinion of him is a lot more valid than yours because I'm a Canadian and you're not.  

 
 
 
Vic Eldred
Professor Principal
3  Vic Eldred    6 days ago

What do they call the current leader of the country at the forefront of leftist ideology?

Here he is during the queen's funeral :




And we will never forget what he did to the truck drivers :

 
 
 
Hallux
Junior Principal
3.1  seeder  Hallux  replied to  Vic Eldred @3    6 days ago
Here he is during the queen's funeral :

During? Try before.

Ah yes the truck drivers whose childish 24 hour horn blaring me-me-me antics kept most of Ottawa awake for well over 2 weeks. Good to read the NYP interviewed those whose lives were put on stop over a childish fit about vaccinations.

I hear your version fizzled out in a parking lot.

          What do they call him?

'Blackface' is as popular up here as 'Brandon' is down there. 'Conservatives' on both sides of the border seem to share the same synapse.

 
 
 
Buzz of the Orient
Professor Principal
3.2  Buzz of the Orient  replied to  Vic Eldred @3    6 days ago

Actually, what he "did" to the truck drivers he in fact did FOR the vast majority of law-abiding peaceful Canadians who preferred to adhere to sensible guidelines to control the pandemic.

 
 
 
Sean Treacy
Professor Expert
4  Sean Treacy    6 days ago

Learning from the Democrats who've called everyone from Goldwater forward a neo- nazi.

1963:  Goldwater is going to Germany to collaborate with his Neo-Nazi brethren!"

Now: "Goldwater was great! Why can't Republicans be more like Goldwater?"

 
 
 
Hallux
Junior Principal
4.1  seeder  Hallux  replied to  Sean Treacy @4    6 days ago

Gee, d'ya think maybe that was possibly a reaction to the Republicans calling everyone on the left a Commie?

 
 
 
Buzz of the Orient
Professor Principal
4.1.1  Buzz of the Orient  replied to  Hallux @4.1    6 days ago

Yes, GOD FORBID a person being a "commie", they are the devil incarnate. 

 
 
 
Sean Treacy
Professor Expert
4.1.2  Sean Treacy  replied to  Buzz of the Orient @4.1.1    6 days ago

They've killed millions more than Nazis. [deleted]

 
 
 
Buzz of the Orient
Professor Principal
4.1.3  Buzz of the Orient  replied to  Sean Treacy @4.1.2    6 days ago

I'm not talking about the past, because there have been lots of historical massacres by many different political adherents, nations, religions, races, whatever.  I replied to a comment about present day Republicans calling left-leaning Americans "commies".  I try not to deflect in order to attack someone like others do.

 
 

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