Trump Sends January 6th Committee a Note from His Podiatrist

  

Category:  Satire

Via:  jbb  •  one month ago  •  28 comments

By:   Conde Nast (The New Yorker)

Trump Sends January 6th Committee a Note from His Podiatrist
The foot specialist indicated that Trump's chronic bone-spur issues had suddenly "been acting up again."

S E E D E D   C O N T E N T



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By Andy Borowitz

October 14, 2022 Boro-Trump-Note.jpg Photograph by Justin Sullivan / Getty

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Minutes after the congressional committee investigating the January 6th insurrection voted unanimously to subpoena the former President, Donald J. Trump responded by submitting a note from his podiatrist.

The foot specialist, Dr. Harland Dorrinson, indicated in the note that Trump's chronic bone-spur issues, which had been asymptomatic in recent years, had suddenly "been acting up again."

"This afternoon, Mr. Trump began experiencing unbearable pain consistent with bone-spur inflammation," the podiatrist wrote. "For this reason, I cannot in good conscience give him permission to testify."

The podiatrist's note did not appear to discourage one committee member, Representative Liz Cheney, who volunteered to hoist Trump onto a luggage trolley and wheel him into the hearing room.


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JBB
Professor Principal
1  seeder  JBB    one month ago

Bone spurs again?

 
 
 
al Jizzerror
Junior Expert
1.1  al Jizzerror  replied to  JBB @1    one month ago
Bone spurs again?

512

 
 
 
Drinker of the Wry
Freshman Principal
2  Drinker of the Wry    one month ago
Bone spurs again?

Thank goodness that Joe Biden's asthma has never returned after disqualifying him for the draft in 68.

 
 
 
JBB
Professor Principal
2.1  seeder  JBB  replied to  Drinker of the Wry @2    one month ago

That is lame, off topic and utterly humorless...

 
 
 
Drinker of the Wry
Freshman Principal
2.1.1  Drinker of the Wry  replied to  JBB @2.1    one month ago

I agree, nothing funny about both of them avoiding the draft as entitled white men.

 
 
 
Tessylo
Professor Principal
2.1.2  Tessylo  replied to  JBB @2.1    one month ago

That is lame, off topic and utterly humorless...

And his MO

 
 
 
al Jizzerror
Junior Expert
2.2  al Jizzerror  replied to  Drinker of the Wry @2    one month ago
Thank goodness that Joe Biden's asthma has never returned after disqualifying him for the draft in 68.

This is from the Snopes site

What's True

Biden received five draft deferments on account of his studies, and after a physical exam in 1968, was disqualified from military service except in the event of a national emergency because of having asthma as a teenager. He never served in the military.

What's False

Biden received his draft deferments because he was a student, not because of his asthma.

 
 
 
Drinker of the Wry
Freshman Principal
2.2.1  Drinker of the Wry  replied to  al Jizzerror @2.2    one month ago
and after a physical exam in 1968, was disqualified from military service except in the event of a national emergency because of having asthma as a teenager.

Yes, like I said.

 
 
 
al Jizzerror
Junior Expert
2.2.2  al Jizzerror  replied to  Drinker of the Wry @2.2.1    one month ago

Trump received a fucking 4-F.   – Registrant not qualified (unfit) for military service .

512

 
 
 
Drinker of the Wry
Freshman Principal
2.2.3  Drinker of the Wry  replied to  al Jizzerror @2.2.2    one month ago

Yes, unfit for service, do you disagree?

 
 
 
al Jizzerror
Junior Expert
2.2.4  al Jizzerror  replied to  Drinker of the Wry @2.2.3    one month ago
Yes, unfit for service, do you disagree?

It's interesting that you didn't specify who you are talking about

Donald Trump was classified 4-F.  (Unfit for military service.)

A 4-F classification means you can NOT be drafted.

Joe Biden was NOT classified 4-F.

Biden didn’t use health excuses to dodge the draft

The AP reported that Biden received deferments first in the early 1960s because he was an undergraduate student at the University of Delaware, and then because he was a law student at Syracuse University. He received his last student deferment in January 1968.

Asthma didn’t come into play until later, as campaign spokesperson David Wade explained in 2008.

"As a result of a physical exam on April 5, 1968, Joe Biden was classified 1-Y and disqualified from service because of asthma as a teenager," Wade told reporters. 

1-Y meant that a person could be drafted only "in time of war or a national emergency." The Selective Service System terminated that classification in 1971.

A 1-Y classification is NOT the same as a 4-F classification.

Joe Biden received college deferments (2-S) and after a REAL physical, he was classified 1-Y. 

A 1-Y classification means you CAN be drafted butt only  "in time of war or a national emergency."

 
 
 
al Jizzerror
Junior Expert
2.2.5  al Jizzerror  replied to  Drinker of the Wry @2.2.3    one month ago

What were your classifications during the draft?

 
 
 
Revillug
Freshman Guide
2.2.6  Revillug  replied to  al Jizzerror @2.2.2    one month ago

 
 
 
Drinker of the Wry
Freshman Principal
2.2.7  Drinker of the Wry  replied to  al Jizzerror @2.2.5    one month ago

High school student.

 
 
 
Drinker of the Wry
Freshman Principal
2.2.8  Drinker of the Wry  replied to  al Jizzerror @2.2.4    one month ago
It's interesting that you didn't specify who you are talking about

Of the two, only one was 4-F.

What did you do in the war daddy?  I was 1-Y.

 
 
 
George
Freshman Participates
2.2.9  George  replied to  Drinker of the Wry @2.2.8    one month ago

It’s amazing, Carter was the last democrat president with enough honor and integrity to serve, you would think a little self realization would prevent democrats from making complete asses out of themselves by now talking about presidents who didn’t serve.

 
 
 
Tessylo
Professor Principal
2.2.10  Tessylo  replied to  al Jizzerror @2.2.5    one month ago

[deleted]

 
 
 
Drinker of the Wry
Freshman Principal
2.2.11  Drinker of the Wry  replied to  Tessylo @2.2.10    one month ago

Don't believe them, no one works for the Pentagon. 

Those that work in that building work for:

  •  Department of Defense
  • Department of the Army
  • Department of the Navy
  • Department of the Air Force
  • Defense Intelligence Agency
  • Defense Counterintelligence and Security Agency
  • Pentagon Force Protection Agency
 
 
 
al Jizzerror
Junior Expert
2.2.12  al Jizzerror  replied to  Drinker of the Wry @2.2.8    one month ago
What did you do in the war daddy?  I was 1-Y.

Nixon took office on Jan. 20th 1969.  During his campaign he pretended that he wanted to end the draft.  He didn't end the draft.  He sent a "message" to Congress in May or 1969. 

Special Message to the Congress on Reforming the Military Draft.

2. Reduce the period of prime draft vulnerability--and the uncertainty that accompanies it--from seven years to one year, so that a young man would normally enter that status during the time he was nineteen years old and leave it during the time he was twenty.

3. Select those who are actually drafted through a random system . A procedure of this sort would distribute the risk of call equally--by lot--among all who are vulnerable during a given year, rather than arbitrarily selecting those whose birthdays happen to fall at certain times of the year or the month.

So, the infamous draft lottery was instituted.

I'm a lucky motherfucker!  I was 19 years old and I finally won something (and I was classified 1-A).

My draft board was in Coney Island (Brooklyn).  My friend there called me and apologized because his uncle who was on the board couldn't "protect" me

I "dodged the draft" by joining the US Navy.  I served in VF-102 on the USS Independence.

So, I'm considered a "Vietnam Era" veteran (which means nobody shot at me).

 
 
 
al Jizzerror
Junior Expert
2.2.13  al Jizzerror  replied to  George @2.2.9    one month ago
It’s amazing, Carter was the last democrat president with enough honor and integrity to serve

JFK, George HW Bush and McCain were war heroes. 

 
 
 
Drinker of the Wry
Freshman Principal
2.2.14  Drinker of the Wry  replied to  al Jizzerror @2.2.12    one month ago
I served in VF-102 on the USS Independence.

I think that you made a wise choice.  A Med cruise on a carrier beats a grunt walking point in the bush.  

Did you have F-4Bs or 4Js then?

 
 
 
al Jizzerror
Junior Expert
2.2.15  al Jizzerror  replied to  Drinker of the Wry @2.2.14    one month ago
Did you have F-4Bs or 4Js then?

VF-102 flew CLASSIFIED aircraft.

 
 
 
George
Freshman Participates
2.2.16  George  replied to  al Jizzerror @2.2.13    one month ago

No argument there. 

 
 
 
al Jizzerror
Junior Expert
3  al Jizzerror    one month ago

Gotta love Andy Borowitz.

Butt, I'm not sure The Donald is having a "bone spur" flare up.

He may have shot himself in the foot again.

512

 
 
 
Kavika
Professor Principal
4  Kavika     one month ago

Ya gotta love Borowitz.

 
 
 
Perrie Halpern R.A.
Professor Principal
5  Perrie Halpern R.A.    one month ago

This needs to be moved into the proper category. Thank you.

 
 
 
al Jizzerror
Junior Expert
5.1  al Jizzerror  replied to  Perrie Halpern R.A. @5    one month ago
This needs to be moved into the proper category.

How does one change the category after an article/seed is published?

 
 
 
Revillug
Freshman Guide
5.1.1  Revillug  replied to  al Jizzerror @5.1    one month ago

You should be able to hit that settings (or details?) icon at the top and then go down to where it says News and Politics and pick something like Entertainment.

And then click whatever looks like "save changes" or "update."

It doesn't always work  for me. Sometimes it gets stuck on demanding that you select a new image.

 
 

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