Joe Manchin Projected To Retain Control Of The Senate

  

Category:  Satire

Via:  gregtx  •  2 weeks ago  •  11 comments

Joe Manchin Projected To Retain Control Of The Senate
WASHINGTON, D.C. — After several days of vote counting, media outlets are now projecting that Joe Manchin will retain control of the Senate.

S E E D E D   C O N T E N T



WASHINGTON, D.C. — After several days of vote counting, media outlets are now projecting that Joe Manchin will retain control of the Senate.

"As the swing vote on the Democrat side, it is my honor to continue to bend the entire Congress to my will," said Manchin to reporters. "I vow to faithfully exercise the duties commensurate with the awesome power that has been granted to me, and will look forward to the exhilarating feeling of being the most talked about person in Washington whenever my party wants to get something done."

The congressman then threw his head back and laughed wickedly.

Sources say Manchin will continue to throw the occasional wrench in whatever the Democrats want to do, at least until the price is right. Already, there is a line of lobbyists outside his offices that stretches past three city blocks.

"Please take a number and get in line," he said. "It's gonna be a lucrative, er... I mean, long, two years."

At publishing time, Kyrsten Sinema attempted to regain some notoriety by unveiling a brand new hair color.


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GregTx
Junior Participates
1  seeder  GregTx    2 weeks ago

512

 
 
 
Ender
Professor Principal
2  Ender    2 weeks ago

If Walker loses his run off, he will be insignificant.

 
 
 
GregTx
Junior Participates
2.1  seeder  GregTx  replied to  Ender @2    2 weeks ago
If Walker loses his run off, he will be insignificant.

Well..... yeah. But Sinema becomes more significant don't you think?

 
 
 
JBB
Professor Principal
2.1.1  JBB  replied to  GregTx @2.1    2 weeks ago

If the gop controls the House, how will the gop ever get 218 votes for their ugly agenda. Nancy Pelosi could manage it. McCarthy will not be able to. Did you ever think about that?

 
 
 
Drinker of the Wry
Freshman Principal
2.1.2  Drinker of the Wry  replied to  JBB @2.1.1    2 weeks ago

Perhaps the inability to pass legislation from either Party is a plus for the country.

 
 
 
Ender
Professor Principal
2.1.3  Ender  replied to  GregTx @2.1    2 weeks ago

I just read she was in the green party at one time.

 
 
 
GregTx
Junior Participates
2.1.4  seeder  GregTx  replied to  Drinker of the Wry @2.1.2    2 weeks ago

That the inability of our government to govern could be a positive for the country is just sad..

 
 
 
GregTx
Junior Participates
2.1.5  seeder  GregTx  replied to  Ender @2.1.3    2 weeks ago

And?

 
 
 
Ender
Professor Principal
2.1.6  Ender  replied to  GregTx @2.1.5    2 weeks ago

Just a little trivia.

 
 
 
Drinker of the Wry
Freshman Principal
2.2  Drinker of the Wry  replied to  Ender @2    2 weeks ago

Since the Dems hold the Senate, he is already insignificant.

 
 
 
JohnRussell
Professor Principal
3  JohnRussell    2 weeks ago

This one is actually slightly funny. Good job everyone. 

 
 

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