ONE EYED REDHEAD
ONE EYED REDHEAD
A man was dining alone in a fancy restaurant and there was a gorgeous redhead sitting at the next table. He had been checking her out since he sat down, but lacked the nerve to talk with her.
Suddenly she sneezed and her glass eye came flying out of its socket towards the man. He reflexively reached out, grabbed it out of the air and handed it back.
'Oh my, I am so sorry,' the woman said, as she popped her eye back in place. 'Let me buy your dinner to make it up to you.'
They enjoyed a wonderful dinner together, and afterwards they went to the theatre followed by drinks.. They talked, they laughed, she shared her deepest dreams and he shared his. She listened to him with interest.
After paying for everything, she asked him if he would like to come to her place for a nightcap and stay for breakfast. They had a wonderful, wonderful time.
The next morning, she cooked a gourmet meal with all the trimmings. The bloke was amazed. Everything had been so incredible!
'You know,' he said, 'you are the perfect woman. Are you this nice to every man you meet?'
'No,' she replies. .
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( The suspense is killing you, isn't it )
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She said...
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" You're just the first man who happened to catch my eye. "
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Too many serious things happening these days. I posted this elsewhere 5 years ago, and I think it's still good for a laugh.
As my grandfather would say: "Oy".
Not "Oy vay"?
It's shorthand for "Oy vay". I've heard it used in that manner many times.
As have I.
before i headed home from my hunting trip, i spent some time with the grand kids . I told them i was going to make irish chili out of some of the venison .
the middle grand daughter took the bait .
she asked what irish chili was .
i donned my exaggerated irish accent and told her , it has exactly 239 beans in it .
she asked why 239?
i told her because one more would make it too farty .
yes i felt the same collective groan as they gave me just now .
BAD grampa , BAD grampa ....
Wow, you have an amazing ability to have noticed. LOL
An old man was celebrating his 80th birthday and his friends decided to get him a special gift. The old mans friends decided to hire a hooker to come to his house that night and give him the time of his life after the party. So the party ends and his friends all head home with a wink and a nod. Later that evening as the old man was getting ready for bed he hears the doorbell ring. He opens the door and sees a woman standing there in a nurses outfit. The old man says in a tired grumble, "What do you want?" to which the woman replies in her sexiest voice, "I'm here to give you super sex!".
The old man thinks for a second and says to the woman, "Fine. I'll take the soup".
LOL. Another good one. I didn't realize I'd be setting off word-play jokes. My being 88 makes your joke ultra-understandable.
What was the snowman doing in the carrot patch?
Picking his nose.
I won a prize for being old - Atrophy...
The way I'm feeling these days, I think I won that prize.
Some great jokes !! Unfortunately I've never had the good fortune to be involved !!!!!!
??? Involved in what?
What do you call a Christian with only one eye?
A Christan.