Scientists Slowly Reintroducing Small Group Of Normal, Well-Adjusted Humans Into Society
A member of the endangered subtype of human, who possesses the unusual abilities to calmly reflect on situations and view the world from others’ perspectives, is reintroduced into the population.
According to officials at Cornell University, where for the past 18 years conservation researchers have operated an enclosed sanctuary for humans who are levelheaded and make it a habit to think before they speak, the endangered group is being cautiously reintegrated into select locations nationwide in hopes that they can reestablish permanent communities and one day thrive again.
“We’ve worked for years to stabilize our society’s dwindling population of sane, generally reasonable people, and within the safe confines of our refuge we’ve finally seen their numbers start to bounce back a little,” said Josh Adelson, head of the Cornell research team, which moved the remaining members of the group into a protected habitat in 1998 to keep them from dying off completely. “Now, we can very gradually begin to release this rare breed of rational humans back into the general public. With luck, they can survive and prosper.
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“Even if this small group of humans able to deal with their negative emotions in a nondestructive manner manages to flourish, there’s still no telling whether the next generation will be able to survive.”
How small is the group? Should they be protected? Do you think that we'll have to put them under government protection?
My concern that is will they revert back to early human form (today).
I'm going to have some more coffee. This is a single bright light, surrounded by danger. I need reinforcement.
Well, you know the old saying:
A journey of a thousand miles starts with a single cup of coffee!
We can only hope that they spread out and spread the calmness genetically! It will take a while, I guess...
Lol awesome article!
Top researchers confirmed that it was already far too late to halt the country’s dominant breed of humans—assholes—from spreading uncontrollably to every region on earth
Such rational beings should not interbreed with those of the common folk, but inbreed within their own group, in order to not suffer a watering down and eventual dissipation of their qualities.
The experiment will never work for just the reasons you gave.
Such rational beings should not interbreed with those of the common folk, but inbreed within their own group, in order to not suffer a watering down and eventual dissipation of their qualities.
I'm afraid one factor in effect re: Evolution today is the growth of the Internet-- specifically social media.
If we continue at our present rate, in a few short years we may devolve into Cro-magnon Man-- perhaps even the Neanderthal Stage.
Damn you Al Gore-- when you invented the Internet did you have any idea what you were getting us into?
You might notice what I've been doing. Because I'm sleeping during your daytime many interesting articles get posted that I miss because they're wiped off the Front Page by the time I'm awake, so I'm going back in the Forums finding articles of interest to me and posting comments on them.
I was surprised to see this on the front page tonight-- it was seeded back in March. Looking over the comments (above) I see it got a few comments on 3/27-- then faded away into obscurity...and probably would not be noticed again...forever...
Then looking over the comments since then, I saw that you were the first onet o comment now and bring it back to peoples' awareness. Which brings up an interesting point-- unless an article is one the front page for any time, many people will miss it entirely.
Anyway-- thanks for doing this (going back in time in the forums and finding interesting stuff-- and then bringing them to our awareness simply be posting a single comment!
Although I'm going to be busy for a while now, I intend to do a lot more of this because I've been getting bored with the typical Front Page fare that pervades the site.
The only know photo of them.
I can't open that photo, Kavika. You might notice what I've been doing. Because I'm sleeping during your daytime many interesting articles get posted that I miss because they're wiped off the Front Page by the time I'm awake, so I'm going back in the Forums finding articles of interest to me and posting comments on them.
It's a photo of the Minions, Buzz.
Yes, I do see what your doing. Good on you.
This time the photo opened. I hope the superior beings are a little better looking than that.