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Donald Trump Says He has "The Best People" Investigating Whose Voice Is On The Access Hollywood Pussy Grabbing tape

  

Category:  News & Politics

Via:  johnrussell  •  9 years ago  •  25 comments

Donald Trump Says He has "The Best People" Investigating Whose Voice Is On The Access Hollywood Pussy Grabbing tape

President Trump announced today that he has sent his personal team of detectives to southern California to find out whose voice  is heard on the infamous Access Hollywood interview where someone bragged about pussy grabbing.

"I have the best people looking into this serious matter", the President said to gathered reporters, "and we will get to the bottom of it no matter what member of the Obama or Clinton factions the evidence leads to".

These events stem from Trump's recent recollection that the voice on the tape saying 

  • “I moved on her like a bitch, but I couldn’t get there. And she was married.”
  • “I did try and fuck her. She was married.”
  • “Just kiss. I don’t even wait. And when you’re a star, they let you do it. You can do anything.”
  • “Grab them by the pussy. You can do anything.”

was not him.

"I promise to try and reveal the results of my investigation before the 2020 election, if possible."

satire


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JohnRussell
Professor Principal
1  seeder  JohnRussell    9 years ago

Like Moore, Trump has ... Hollywood” tape , in which he boasted about …

 
 
 
JohnRussell
Professor Principal
2  seeder  JohnRussell    9 years ago

This just in - Trump says his detectives have arrived in Honolulu , er I mean L.A. , and are learning "incredible"  things about who was really on the tape.

 
 
 
MrFrost
Professor Guide
3  MrFrost    9 years ago

It wasn't trump, it was, "John Miller"... Trumps press guy... LOL

 
 
 
JohnRussell
Professor Principal
3.1  seeder  JohnRussell  replied to  MrFrost @3    9 years ago

Good one.

 
 
 
MrFrost
Professor Guide
4  MrFrost    9 years ago

President Trump announced today that he has sent his personal team of detectives to southern California to find out whose voice  is heard on the infamous Access Hollywood interview where someone bragged about pussy grabbing.

If this is the same team that is investigating Obama being born in Kenya.....we may be in for a long wait... LMAO. 

 
 
 
Hal A. Lujah
Professor Participates
5  Hal A. Lujah    9 years ago

Trump just remembered that it wasn’t him on the tape that he apologized for.  That’s our leader.  He belongs in an Alzheimer’s unit, not the White House.

 
 
 
JohnRussell
Professor Principal
5.1  seeder  JohnRussell  replied to  Hal A. Lujah @5    9 years ago

He belongs in an Alzheimer’s unit

Wouldn't cost him any votes.

 
 
 
Sunshine
Professor Quiet
5.2  Sunshine  replied to  Hal A. Lujah @5    9 years ago

you think joking about Alzheimer patients is funny.  par for your comments.

 
 
 
JohnRussell
Professor Principal
5.2.1  seeder  JohnRussell  replied to  Sunshine @5.2    9 years ago

Hal can speak for himself, but my guess would be he wasn't joking.

 
 
 
Hal A. Lujah
Professor Participates
5.2.2  Hal A. Lujah  replied to  JohnRussell @5.2.1    9 years ago

Serious as a heart attack.

 
 
 
MrFrost
Professor Guide
5.2.3  MrFrost  replied to  Sunshine @5.2    9 years ago
you think joking about Alzheimer patients is funny.  par for your comments.

Trump made fun of a disabled reporter, taking the moral high ground here is laughable at best. 

 
 
 
Sunshine
Professor Quiet
5.2.4  Sunshine  replied to  Hal A. Lujah @5.2.2    9 years ago

sure it was

 
 
 
Sunshine
Professor Quiet
5.2.5  Sunshine  replied to  MrFrost @5.2.3    9 years ago

thought liberals where superior to Trump

 
 
 
lennylynx
Sophomore Silent
5.2.6  lennylynx  replied to  Sunshine @5.2.5    9 years ago

Cockroaches are superior to Trump.

 
 
 
MrFrost
Professor Guide
5.2.7  MrFrost  replied to  Sunshine @5.2.5    9 years ago
thought liberals where superior to Trump

Everyone is superior to trump. I have seen primates with more class and maturity than trump. "Just look at that face, who could vote for a face like that!!!". Trump is a bottom feeding MORON!!! Now he is crying about not being named person of the year? Are you kidding me? 

IMG_20171029_092313.jpg

 
 
 
Sunshine
Professor Quiet
5.2.8  Sunshine  replied to  lennylynx @5.2.6    9 years ago

so liberals are cockroaches. got it.   laughing dude

 
 
 
Sunshine
Professor Quiet
5.2.10  Sunshine  replied to  MrFrost @5.2.7    9 years ago

did you say something about faces?

197106_5_.png

 
 
 
MrFrost
Professor Guide
5.2.11  MrFrost  replied to  Sunshine @5.2.10    9 years ago

No, I said something about morality. Of which, trump has none. 

 
 
 
sandy-2021492
Professor Guide
6  sandy-2021492    9 years ago

He screwed up the order of steps in defending his conduct.  You deny first until they roll the tape, and you can't deny, then you say that's not really what you meant, then you offer an insincere apology minimizing your part in the scandal, while deflecting to your opponent.

He's off-script.

 
 
 
Rmando
Sophomore Silent
7  Rmando    9 years ago

What's sad is that even though this is obviously satire- and poor satire at that too- the "coverage" by CNN using phrases like "mock grope" for Al Franken was all too real.

 
 
 
MrFrost
Professor Guide
7.1  MrFrost  replied to  Rmando @7    9 years ago
Al Franken

So you are saying that trump claiming that it wasn't him on the recording after admitting that it was him, is totally ok with you? Really? 

 
 
 
MrFrost
Professor Guide
7.1.2  MrFrost  replied to    9 years ago

Hey, maybe it was john miller, trumps press secretary... LOL 

 
 

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