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Clarence Thomas Receives Invite To Celebration Of First Black Supreme Court Justice

  

Category:  Satire

Via:  gregtx  •  2 years ago  •  34 comments

Clarence Thomas Receives Invite To Celebration Of First Black Supreme Court Justice
U.S. - Justice Clarence Thomas walked out to get his mail this morning and found a surprise in his mailbox. According to sources, he was lucky enough to receive an invitation to celebrate Kentanji Brown Jackson's confirmation as the nation's first black Supreme Court Justice.'Yippee! I feel so honored to have been invited to such a histori ...

S E E D E D   C O N T E N T



U.S.—Justice Clarence Thomas walked out to get his mail this morning and found a surprise in his mailbox. According to sources, he was lucky enough to receive an invitation to celebrate Kentanji Brown Jackson's confirmation as the nation's first black Supreme Court Justice.

"Yippee! I feel so honored to have been invited to such a historic celebration!" said the longtime originalist justice appointed by George H.W. Bush. "Wow—the first black Supreme Court Justice. Who would have thought I'd see such a day?"

Justice Thomas then dropped the rest of the mail and jumped up and down while clutching the RSVP made of pink, lacy stationery.

Several critics have opposed Thomas's invitation to KBJ's barrier-breaking confirmation party. "This day is a victory for black people, not white people like Clarence Thomas," said Betina McSwan, an activist for the group Demand Justice. "He opposed reparations and affirmative action just because it violates the Constitution. Then he voted for Trump, so he ain't black!"

Others were confused by the invitation, saying that Thurgood Marshall deserves to be honored as the first black Supreme Court Justice due to his being the first black Supreme Court Justice.

"That's ridiculous," said McSwan. "Blackness isn't skin color, but is more of an idea, like Antifa, gender, and the Constitution."

At publishing time, Thomas decided not to attend after finding he was only invited so the January 6 committee could bug his house.


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GregTx
PhD Guide
1  seeder  GregTx    2 years ago

512

 
 
 
XXJefferson51
Senior Guide
1.1  XXJefferson51  replied to  GregTx @1    2 years ago

Secular progressives have long denied that Clarence Thomas is really an African American.  

 
 
 
Vic Eldred
Professor Principal
1.2  Vic Eldred  replied to  GregTx @1    2 years ago

Great satire has an element of truth mixed in. Well done to the BB.

 
 
 
Tacos!
Professor Guide
2  Tacos!    2 years ago

I get the joke and all that, but I do think it’s racist to insist that a man is not black or “black enough” if he’s conservative.

 
 
 
Sparty On
Professor Principal
2.1  Sparty On  replied to  Tacos! @2    2 years ago

“Racist” is what racists tell you it is.

jrSmiley_9_smiley_image.gif

 
 
 
Hallux
Masters Principal
2.1.1  Hallux  replied to  Sparty On @2.1    2 years ago

By all means, do digress.

 
 
 
Sparty On
Professor Principal
2.1.2  Sparty On  replied to  Hallux @2.1.1    2 years ago

Nah but feel free to pontificate the usual partisan driven deflection and personal attacks.    

No worries now, NT po-po will continue to backstop it  ....

 
 
 
Right Down the Center
Junior Guide
2.1.3  Right Down the Center  replied to  Sparty On @2.1    2 years ago

Well said

 
 
 
squiggy
Junior Silent
2.1.4  squiggy  replied to  Hallux @2.1.1    2 years ago
By all means, do digress.

Holy shit - the suggestion that Blacks could be racist dumps the teacart again.

 
 
 
Hallux
Masters Principal
3  Hallux    2 years ago

Yes Clarence, you also can get life insurance for only $9.99 a month ... and here's a free application hint: Do Not Included Your Death Certificate.

 
 
 
Right Down the Center
Junior Guide
3.1  Right Down the Center  replied to  Hallux @3    2 years ago
Yes Clarence, you also can get life insurance for only $9.99 a month

By all means, do digress.

 
 
 
Hallux
Masters Principal
3.1.1  Hallux  replied to  Right Down the Center @3.1    2 years ago

Sure, just for you ... it's a 'satirical' comment on the pic used for the 'satire'.

 
 
 
Right Down the Center
Junior Guide
3.1.2  Right Down the Center  replied to  Hallux @3.1.1    2 years ago
it's a 'satirical' comment

Keep trying, I hear the onion is hiring.

 
 
 
Drinker of the Wry
Junior Expert
4  Drinker of the Wry    2 years ago

"That's ridiculous," said McSwan. "Blackness isn't skin color, but is more of an idea, like Antifa, gender, and the Constitution."

She got that right, Betina is one smart lady.

 
 
 
Hallux
Masters Principal
4.1  Hallux  replied to  Drinker of the Wry @4    2 years ago

Betina McSwan ... let me know if you figure out the chosen names for this Italian/Viking non-existent lady. It's hard to hear what dogs can't.

 
 
 
Drinker of the Wry
Junior Expert
4.1.1  Drinker of the Wry  replied to  Hallux @4.1    2 years ago

Italian Viking?  Isn’t Betina Croatian?  And McSwan is Irish or Scottish,  probably a slave owner 200 years ago.

 
 
 
Sparty On
Professor Principal
4.1.2  Sparty On  replied to  Drinker of the Wry @4.1.1    2 years ago

One wonders if she knows Skeetz MacGrewder.    Irish American white trash journalist from Kansatucky

 
 
 
JBB
Professor Principal
5  JBB    2 years ago

Two Words - Thurgood Marshall 

 
 
 
Sparty On
Professor Principal
5.1  Sparty On  replied to  JBB @5    2 years ago

One word ...... satire.

 
 
 
Right Down the Center
Junior Guide
5.1.1  Right Down the Center  replied to  Sparty On @5.1    2 years ago
One word ...... satire.

Some people would not recognize satire if you told them it was satire before they read it.

 
 
 
Hallux
Masters Principal
5.1.2  Hallux  replied to  Right Down the Center @5.1.1    2 years ago
Some people would not recognize satire if you told them it was satire before they read it.

Some people are blinded by the lack of originality in such comments ... you should be celebrating.

 
 
 
Sparty On
Professor Principal
5.1.3  Sparty On  replied to  Hallux @5.1.2    2 years ago
Some people are blinded by the lack of originality in such comments

Yeah, you should work on that .... 

 
 
 
Right Down the Center
Junior Guide
5.1.4  Right Down the Center  replied to  Hallux @5.1.2    2 years ago
Some people are blinded by the lack of originality in such comments

Yet I believe there is still hope for you to say something original.

 
 
 
Texan1211
Professor Principal
5.1.5  Texan1211  replied to  Right Down the Center @5.1.4    2 years ago
Yet I believe there is still hope for you to say something original

Why?

 
 
 
Right Down the Center
Junior Guide
5.1.6  Right Down the Center  replied to  Texan1211 @5.1.5    2 years ago
Why?

I have faith that all things are possible, no matter how unlikely.

 
 
 
Sean Treacy
Professor Principal
5.2  Sean Treacy  replied to  JBB @5    2 years ago

You should tell chuck Schumer.  He doesn’t know thurgood Marshall existed either.

 
 
 
JBB
Professor Principal
5.2.1  JBB  replied to  Sean Treacy @5.2    2 years ago

Olde white men getting their jollies ridiculing a major historical milestone for all black women is something worth of a darker kind of satire...

 
 
 
Drinker of the Wry
Junior Expert
5.2.2  Drinker of the Wry  replied to  JBB @5.2.1    2 years ago

I didn’t know that all the Bee writers were olde white men.  Haven’t they also lampooned Trump, Joel Osteen and others on the right?    

 
 
 
squiggy
Junior Silent
5.3  squiggy  replied to  JBB @5    2 years ago
Two Words - Thurgood Marshall

In a preemptive measure, just for you, he was mentioned - buried deeply in the fifth paragraph.

 
 
 
Right Down the Center
Junior Guide
6  Right Down the Center    2 years ago

Her name is Kentanji Brown Jackson?  I thought her name was Historic Kentanji Brown Jackson

 
 
 
JohnRussell
Professor Principal
7  JohnRussell    2 years ago

Still waiting for the first funny Babylon Bee article. 

 
 
 
Right Down the Center
Junior Guide
7.1  Right Down the Center  replied to  JohnRussell @7    2 years ago

Yet you still read it?

I am pretty sure a sense of humor, a non partisan lens and an appreciation of satire would be required to think their stuff was funny.

 
 
 
Texan1211
Professor Principal
7.2  Texan1211  replied to  JohnRussell @7    2 years ago
Still waiting for the first funny Babylon Bee article. 

Still waiting for a liberal to actually UNDERSTAND a Babylon Bee article.

Is there a reason I should hope for a miracle here?

 
 
 
Right Down the Center
Junior Guide
7.2.1  Right Down the Center  replied to  Texan1211 @7.2    2 years ago
Still waiting for a liberal to actually UNDERSTAND a Babylon Bee article. Is there a reason I should hope for a miracle here?

They would have to admit they are not perfect first before they would be open enough to understand it so that drops the likelihood to less than 5%.

 There may be hope in the future, especially since the far left are making asses of themselves more and more.  A few might return to the light, that might be the miracle we are hoping for.

 
 

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