Groucho

The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made.

  
By:  Groucho  •  Humor and Politics  •  4 years ago  •  11 comments

The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made.

"Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies."  -- Groucho

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Groucho
Freshman Silent
1  author  Groucho    4 years ago

What a great time to be alive - if I were around I could make a living on political jokes alone. 

 
 
 
TᵢG
Professor Principal
1.1  TᵢG  replied to  Groucho @1    4 years ago
if I were around I could make a living on political jokes alone.

Congress is full of political jokes making a living.

 
 
 
Raven Wing
Professor Expert
1.1.1  Raven Wing  replied to  TᵢG @1.1    4 years ago
Congress is full of political jokes making a living.

Indeed. And at the expense of the taxpayers in more ways than just monetary. 

 
 
 
TᵢG
Professor Principal
1.2  TᵢG  replied to  Groucho @1    4 years ago

What a strange name.

 
 
 
Release The Kraken
PhD Principal
2  Release The Kraken    4 years ago

Why go into politics with that talent? Just go into sales.....

 
 
 
Groucho
Freshman Silent
4  author  Groucho    4 years ago

"All people are born alike - except Republicans and Democrats." -- Groucho

 
 
 
Groucho
Freshman Silent
5  author  Groucho    4 years ago

"I read in the newspapers they are going to have 30 minutes of intellectual stuff on television every Monday from 7:30 to 8. to educate America.  They couldn't educate America if they started at 6:30." -- Groucho

 
 
 
Ender
Professor Principal
5.1  Ender  replied to  Groucho @5    4 years ago

You can now use a voucher.

 
 
 
Groucho
Freshman Silent
5.2  author  Groucho  replied to  Groucho @5    3 years ago
I read in the newspapers they are going to have 30 minutes of intellectual stuff on television every Monday from 7:30 to 8. to educate America.  They couldn't educate America if they started at 6:30.

Test quoted comment

 
 
 
Buzz of the Orient
Professor Principal
6  Buzz of the Orient    4 years ago

I looked for one that was applicable:

"Look at me. I worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty." — Groucho Marx

 
 
 
Perrie Halpern R.A.
Professor Principal
7  Perrie Halpern R.A.    4 years ago
 
 
 
Enoch
Masters Quiet
8  Enoch    3 years ago

Said Groucho: "I am at an age where I could go any day now. That is good news. I haven't gone in three days".

"I would never join  any country club which would have me as a member". 

When invited to a restricted country club by a member as a guest, his daughter wanted to swim with a school mate friend there. The life guard came to Groucho and advised that the club rules prohibit Jewish people from entering the pool. Mr. Marx addressed the life guard by saying, "My daughter is half Jewish - half Christian. Can she go into the pool up to her waist"?

Quotable quotations.

P&AB.

Enoch.