Welcome To My Coming Out Party
S E E D E D C O N T E N T
For 77.6.16 years, like, perhaps, many of you, girls, I hid in the CLOSET, afraid to come out. But, not anymore. Today is the day! Welcome to my Coming Out Party. Gifts, particularly large amounts of "cash" is always appreciated at these events.
Since I was a young lad, about nine years old. I knew I was destined for the "closet". I practiced when my folks and siblings were out of the house, which seemed to me, "all the time".
One day they said they were going to the grocery and never returned. It was just us kids, raising kids. Without proper parental guidance, I spent an inordinate amount of time hanging upside down from a wire hanger, like a bat in the security of the downstairs closet. My shame, my secret stayed hid for 77.5.14 years.
Confined, as I am, to the Dick Cheney NURSING HOME for Wayward Republicans, where "waterboarding is a therapy, not torture, I could remain silent no more.
In a rash moment, I escaped, broke into a Video store and recorded this video.
Enjoy, or, not, but, please post a comment. I am so "needy," and, may go at any moment. My Expiration is rapidly approaching. In fact, I may be gone by the time you receive this pleading request.
Besides, you do not want to be "haunted" by a mischievous spirit from the other side, now, do you?
https://www.facebook.com/UncleYohnnie/videos/1680780325311990/?t=42
Per usual, in my feeble state, I am sure if this link works, nothing does anymore. For those of you lucky enough to unwrap it will, no doubt, see is the "Hidden Message", that may well, "set you free"!
Or, not!
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Hello, anyone home?
I'm still trying to find the "Video". Give me a few more sec's......Damn !
T this site:
Okay.....I actually understood the Vid..
I must be as "Insane" as the Vid. !
Beware: It is spreading, soon everyone will be NUTS!
If I weren't soooooo "Insane", I'd probably say ….. "I know it" !
Hope your implants turned out OK.
Excellent work. I used Melania Trump's doctor, Drs. Ding-Dong & Ding-A-Ling, Chinese Simatic Twins, jointed at the booty by GOD!
Oh, poppy, darn, fart, Hell, that link is to my confession, "Why I am a Trump Supporter!'
I am searching for the Smithsonian Archives for my highly personal video, "Welcome to My Coming Out Party".
My bad will be "your bad" when I correct it.
"let the president do his job....whatever the hell that is.."
Priceless.. LOL
What is his job?
Golfing, apparently.
I'm good with golfing. More golfing, less presidenting.
That is what we need, "a pussy grabbing president that doesn't read, shoots from the lips, ignores his staff and advisers and golf every damn week-end at one of his properties cost taxpayers over $130,000,000 which goes into his pocket.
Trump is an unmitigated CROOK, a disgrace, and an Internationally know thief.
He must be REMOVED, asap!
MrFrost: As a "Certified Idiot", I must say that this is the video that I wished to attach to my informative Epistle is the one above. The other, "Why I am a Trump Supporter" has received over 67000 views and, not favorable comment.
Is that wonderful for a Masochist?
Try this link:
Foster Brooks? Is that you?
I thought you were dead.
4 Sparty On: I am dead. Just like the bulk of Trump Supporters!
Well better dead than red i always say .....
Apparently, this new brand of Conservative Christian Republicans is embracing PUTIN and Kim Jong-Un. Are they dead?
Only in liberal la-la land where mental breaks with reality are apparently the norm since 2016
Where the highs are low and the lows are much, much lower.
Trump University fine $24 MILLION and forced to close because it was a SCAM.
Trump Foundation forced to close because it was a SCAM and using non-profit funds for personal use by "the Donald".
The Trump Organization was on the bankruptcy ropes when an American firm owned by a Russian oligarch (Mafia head) invested $900 MILLION DOLLARS in Donald's company.
Six know Russian Mafia heads purchased Condos in Trump's Soho Project.
China loans Trump $500 MILLION DOLLARS for his Indonesian Hotel/Casino/Spa. (In the Orient, a Spa is a sanitized word for a BROTHEL.)
After the Chinese President met with "the Donald" China award Trump six licenses to develop a string of Hotel/Casino/Spas in China/
Saudi Arabia gave Ivanka $150,000,000 for her Non-Profit Foundation which was recently forced to close for misuse of funds.
$47 Million dollars from the Inauguration Fund is still unaccounted for and that enterprise is looking at misuse of funds for personal gain.
Read the Muller Report.
No, no, no, Mister Frost, I am not a COMEDIAN. I am an "Unemployed Philosopher"!
No, it is Fester Brook, Foster's half brother.
I see, like an aggravated boil ..... you do tend to Fester.
Wasn't Fester Marshall Dillon's sidekick?
Lol .... no i don't think so but he was a Festus for the rest of us.
Yeah. Good old Festus.
uncle fester, the adams family.
shhhhh,, keep it down... I'm watching "gunsmoke".
"Click, click," you're so right! Good show, Old boy! And, that is one fhit-hot avatar too! Shh, everybody!
Ok we get it. You are a typical arrogant leftist who despises conservative Americans
It's called, "comedy", you should try it.
Yep, it's like the video's of all those people randomly screaming at the sky.
Weird but funny as hell.
Hey if that's what you want to do, feel free, not my thing though.
Good to hear.
Isn't my thing either so you can rest easy
Great, I will return to my self induced coma.
Exactly! Real abstract art!
I do that every night before falling to sleep. It is exhilarating and pisses off my neighbor.
"Screaming at the Sky" should be required in every college in America, but, ban in Universities. They are not ready for enlightenment, yet.
Yeah, sooner or later your voice gives out from all that screaming.
Coma should help
Coma, or, comma? Perhaps, both!
Oh, no. I apologize if I left you with that incorrect impression! I am a devotee of President Trump. I just love his fake hair, fake tan, fake wife's fake breasts, fake assets, fake wealth, fake bravado.
I am a faker, too. Indeed, as Publisher and Flounder of Eat The Press - Do Not Read It, we are the originators of FAKE NEWS. We are so fake we just make "Chips Up", cow chips, that is.
I hope this clears things up, Sweetie.
livefreeordie is not a CoC Violation [Split Personality]. It is a true response from a reader, after all, is that not what we all desire, "real feedback"?
I know that was satire, and I love it as satire. Without speaking to the message necessarily, you, sir, are a real talent and a natural performer!!! Three cheers! I thoroughly enjoyed the show! Spot on scripting!
Come back and don't leave me this way, Thelma Houston!
Thelma Houston, aka CB, I never know if this piece work or not. I improvise a bit, and, it is always "hit and miss". I have been hit many times while performing in clubs.
In the old days, critics threw "Rotten Tomatoes" if they dislike your set, and, oversized bras and athletic supporters, if they did.
Today, they throw can of tomato soup, or, dildos, which I still can't figure how to put them into a salad.
Please, do not make the mistake that I am a comedian. No siree, I am an "Unemployed Philosopher".
You can be my my muse any time you wish, ETPDNRI! Employed or unemployed. We desire truth in our character types and you need network 'status.' Good show, O'boy! Grand Old Portrayal!
You are hired as my agent/mgr., 20% of the proceeds. Get to work!
What is up with Red Flags in a circle posted at the bottom of many replies. Are they Russian spies?
The flags mean nuthin' —unless you get cross with your fellow team members, then they lay down until one of our resident 'shock troopers' come by for a Look-see. Then, WATCH OUT!
Things can get kind of wild in your upper right quadrant (under your handle) where 'fines' can collect. The semi-good news is if you get 'MOD-eD' on today - on tomorrow your upper right quadrant will be swept clean and perfumed for June!
On every site I post, it is always Red Neck, Loose Lipped, Vulgar Re-Puritans that get their panties in a knot and run to "Mommie" with a complaint.
followers. I believe that we cannot allow the ignorant to run things.
They are brain dead cowards afraid that being duped is an affirmation that they are dull. If they admitted they were duped they lose what little manhood they had.
I do not HATE TRUMP, or, his foolish, ignorant, undereducated
I agree in a way in that we should not be in a position where the ignorant run things, yet, administration, after administration, after administration too much of this happens.
That said, why are you making fun of those poor hill billy kids? I see you are trying to draw a parallel here, but those kids are not a cause, they are an effect.
I see this article as another form of identity politics.
My minds says, get to the point man.
As for the vid, I don't know. Many avoid farcebook like the plague.
P.S. Just an opinion from a hater of all extremists.
"Mr. Philosopher!" I fully agree I do not hate President Donald Trump, what I detest and will not abide is lying, thieving, provocateurs of any color, race, or creed. Speaking of the last in that list, Vice-President Mike Pence is detestable, along with republicans who will not respect (or defend) standing law of this country. It is not conducive to good order for government to not govern itself according to the laws it establishes. It is not good enough to keep tearing this country down and putting it back together again. As is normal in such circumstances, you weak something in the offing!
That is, we keep fighting 'yesteryear' battles, thus delaying another generation (like us that will soon pass away) a unified future.
Talk to me, Mr. Philosopher, in that way you have with words!
CB: You hit a home run with that rip. We are in a battle for the soul of this nation, and, there are too many sitting on the sidelines with their hands over their eyes as the Destroyers march by in unison.
I have always been puzzled how one man, Hitler could hypnotize a nation, know I am seeing it first hand with Trump.
Anyone that supports this MONSTER is an ENEMY OF THE STATE!
We are at war with HATE!
Forgive me y'all this comparison, but. . . Donald Trump and conservative republicans have been enjoyin' their love-making so far and are looking to round it out with a 'Crescendo."
Democrats don't even know how (or when) to 'blow a fuse.' I remember former Majority Leader John Boehner standing in the well of the House of Representative pounding on something hard and going "Hell No!" —and soon he became Speaker Boehner. So much so, that he invited and toured the Pope around 'his house,' retired happy, fat, and actually fulfilled.
My fellow democrats, pundits, and favorite anchors are STILL all over television calling Trump ('The dirtiest player in the Game') — "The President." I can not believe some of the mouth's these words, "The president. . . ." —are coming out of all MSNBC day and over into the night.
Even CNN ("Trump" hates CNN!) calls Trump, "The President. . . ." no doubt.
I am old enough to remember when Steve Kornacki, and a large percentage of MSNBC's news "family" hastened to drop that formality with President Obama. It did not take long at all before President Obama's title was shortened (stripped away) to simply, "Obama." I have been waiting nearly three full years for my news family of choice to turn "The President" into simply "Trump."
Democrats need to treat everybody with fairness! Obama saved us from a greater and deeper recession. Obama cried over dead children and grown folks alike! Trump stands on the shoulders of Obama and pisses down his own leg.
How that ETP' for small matters which can piss off a 'party'?
Here is the deal. When "the President"— bah, when Trump was a candidate I can remember an interview where he flatly stated that politicians were guilty of not knowing how to fight back. Trump said professional politicians throw in the towel, quit, and abandon their offices. He would not do that.
Well, true to this word, "this guy" Trump is proving one thing clearly about himself: He is a bare-knuckled brawler. Even without a stool in his corner to take a break on, "this guy" still is a fire-breathing dragon blowing off in the bowels of Washington, D.C.
Hitler he ain't; a Mesmerizer he ain't; the ring its begging for a good referee!
I agree, the evidence is clear Trump and the Republican hypocrites stole the election with the help of Russia, Wikileaks and $45 million dollars of Republicans investigations into Hillary's use of a private server.
Several top echelon folks in the Trump administration, i.e, Ivanka, Kurshner, Miller, Sanders, and, many others have been caught doing the same.
Yet, Conservatives, who promote themselves as Watchdogs of Government, have lost their watches and, now, are stripped of their reputation, leaving them as just old political dogs.
No one stole the election.
That is something Hillary fans like to claim because she lost.
Just another in a long line of excuses as to why your beloved Abuela lost a sure thing.
Yeah, good old Hillary. I used to run a digital out called, Hillary Universe, on Newsvine. Both 'locations' are defunct places on the web now. Hillary blindsided me and every democrat in the country in 2016 with that server business. She could not surmount that one! And, Trump diminished her in the eyes of the electoral college over it too.
We have to take stock of how 'megaphone' Trump identifies as lips with sounds uttered from it. He will bury an opponent with repetition and droning on and on about an opponent's perceived shortcoming/s. Repetition is Trump's superpower.
Biden, Warren, Buttigieg, and maybe beyond should shore up or lay out all their worse social baggage and let it be assessed and passed before the public now! Or "Megaphone Mouth" is going to go all scorched earth with any such materials findings in 2020.
Bet this: Trump and conservatives are already compiling opposition research on all our democrat candidates. Democrats better be smart and pick well our 'contestant' from the pack.
By the way, I have better see some ads starting now or early January 2020 with some true and serious (not BS - but deep dive) opposition research about Trump! Democrats have had three plus years plus to pull this stuff together. Trump ain't "all that and a bag of ____!" He puts his pants on just like every other man. Time to hand this chump his baggage for real and make it politically hurt and stick to him!
My choice for a 2020 win is a Biden/Kamala Harris ticket, with Joe being the "Ronald MacDonald Greeter" and Kamala Harris, the power behind the throne.
Biden will do one term, if that, leaving the WH door wide open for Kamala and her professional team to sweep into office with overwhelming numbers in 2024 and 2028, giving us 12 years of stability and time to clean up Trump's B.S.
Additionally, I think it is imperative that CONGRESS start the "Impeachment Investigation", and, use it as a visual tool to educate the public on the enormity of these MONSTERS Crime Wave.
Trump and the Republican enablers must be destroyed, decimated and sent packing back to Hill Billy Heaven with their Rec Caps jammed up their Red Arses!
CB: Since the moment this POS was conceived the media has been all over his case. However, the public is, unfortunately, too damn busy scraping by trying to put food on the table to delve into his congenital CRIMINALITY.
Besides, everyone, but, a few, wants to be rich and they think that Trump shows them how to do it!
Trump has used, worked and hoodwinked the media for over three decades creating a FALSE PERSONAE.
The evidence from "Impeachment Investigations" will overwhelm the general public with the disgusting facts about this "wannabe" Mafia King Pin.
Trump is a PUNK, a rich, spoiled, cowardly punk. He needs his clock cleaned.
2020 is going to tough on you.
Best to gird your loins right now for the coming onslaught.
Here it comes .....
Trump represents something real to conservatives: He is that hammer that swings and connects with the problems their "movement" has been sorely lacking 'remedy' for all these many years.
Most citizens of this country like to think they can live with themselves if they become the hard-nose type who cheats on his or her taxes, lies, lies, and lies some more to the government and everybody else, gets away with paying a pittance in wages, or is 'slick' in deal-making. On the other-hand, most of our citizens are coming to grips with national repentance and regret of past wrongs and misdeeds executed just to get ahead of the other guys or gals by keeping them 'down and out.'
Democrats need to demonstrate a way forward that is do-able and practical; one which does not require a foot on the neck of liberties for their fellow man or woman. In this way, they can expose the wasteful tactics and strategies of the republicans and conservatives for what they are. Bring social change on methodically and incrementally, not as a shock to the national 'body.'
Have you read the Mueller Report?
What would you call it when a foreign power worked to install a candidate? The Trump administration continues to do favors for Putin.
An entire Russian Intelligence company was detailed by Putin to interfere with our presidential election in favor of Trump. Approximately, $43 million of Russian funds was funneled through the NRA to the Republican candidates.
When Trump is drug down the WH steps, who will I have left to skewer?
You're going to have about six more years to do so.
So ...... don't worry. Be happy!
My goal is 10 more years, so, my grandchildren will be in college and hopefully carving out a path for themselves, while I soar through the Universe looking for my next adventure, after, consultation with the Big Guy, or, Girls.
Thanks for the good wishes!
Dave 2693993, I write SATIRE, not journalism. My header explains that we, "EAT THE PRESS - DO NOT READ IT", is the original FAKE NEWS, we are so fake we just make CRAP UP!
I appreciate your issues, but, by your standards, no comic or humorist would be allowed to write anything.
No worries, praise the 22 Amendment and pass the popcorn.
Trump said the election was rigged, did you forget that part?
Correct. No one stole it. The ELECTION was a gift With Love From Russia.
Good one, Jonathon.
Thanks, Pat Wilson. One never knows how others might take this Epistles. But, I am compelled to annoy folks with my posts.
Is that wrong?
Did the video show up?
Not for me. Is there a text version?
Try this link. I am having difficulty uploading a video that I made LIVE on FB for any other site.
Nor, am I certain how to save it in my video file.
Anyway, here is the link:
I trust you enjoy SATIRE.
Love satire, and thanks for trying, but FaceBook is banned here, as is google, twitter, YouTube, a lot of news media and damn it all, now even Wikipedia. Of course there's still a lot of sites I can open so I'm not entirely stranded and blocked from news from around the world.
Thanks for the "heads up". Insider information is always helpful. For example, my post are biodegradable derived from pure "Natural Gas"!
Yes it did.
Would someone advise me on how to share this video to my video file on The NewsTalkers.com?
1. Posting Youtube videos:
2. Posting non-Youtube videos:
Hey, thanks for the link. I printed it out and am now hiring a team of "Geeks" to help me interpret it. Unfortunately, they sent me a team of GREEKS. All they do is drink wine at my expense and F*** each other!
Damn technology exposes me every time.
Start at 'Step 1' and slowly find your location on the screen. Then, go to 'Step 2' and find it. If you need additional help or you reach a 'wtf' moment—Reach out to me. I am a geek too!
I started at the WTF moment. The problem is I create these videos on Facebook, under the "GO LIVE" TAG, and post them on FB.
I am unable to share them with YouTube, which would allow me to embed them here.
Any help would be greatly appreciated. But, remember you are talking to a "CERTIFIED MAROON".
Well, I am not a FBer. So I am not sure if "Go Live" is compatible with and falls under the SECOND link:
Posting non-Youtube videos:
Please give it a strong try. Your work deserves proliferation. (Smile. Holler back!)
CB: What is up with TheNewsTalkers.com? They certainly seem to have become much more Conservative.
Two of my articles are now "locked" for frivolous alleged infractions of the CoC.
Even Halpern reamed me out for reminding a poster that "Tobacco is for smoking not chewing". That is hardly a personal attack.
Oddly, the enforcers of the CoC have never mentioned all of the explicit sexual add that appear, almost exclusively, to the right of my exquisite columns.
It true, "give a little power to someone and it goes right to their head". Obviously, it affects the RIGHT SIDE the most.
Visit my FB page is that is not against the laws, here, in Conservative Heaven!
John K. Roberts (Little Johnnie Jump Up). I will get the link.
It's election build up time yet again (and the Trump surrogates, foreign (Russian) bots, and "contingency fighters") are fanning out and staging on the Internet.
Just ask 'em:
1. KellyAnne Conway is that you? I see you, Gurl!!!
2. Hey! Where did you get your bot? Mine is down and I need a replacement quick!
3. Boris Epshteyn what are you having at dinner to go with today's Trump lie?
FB? I turned in my account on FB as a protest against not being kept safe from "Red Dawn 2 - The Social Media Project!"
Awwwww there's few opposing views being posted on on NT's?
The nerve of those conservatives ....
..... why you oughta .....
..... oh the humanity ....
Better get a call out to the the Resistobots and start dumping more liberal propaganda.
Tell the the hive ..... release the drones!
My understanding that the powers that be, here, do not allow any contact with FB, TWITTER, etc. What are they afraid of, cross contamination.
The Alerts has gone out. Reinforcement coming, soon. Hold on, the Red Bots are retreating.
"The Only Thing We Have To Fear Is . . ." Russian Interference with our elections!
..... and FBI interference in our elections ...... and British spy interference in our election ..... and biased media interference in our elections .... etc, etc dot dot dot
Oh the humanity!
And Trump interfering with elections! Yeah, that is my frustration with your supposition that we have become a banana republic and J. Edward Hoover returns! Is that a smirk? Really, who can smirk in these times?
Did he? Better tell that to Mueller.
And Banana Republic? Clearly you’ve never been to a real one of those. I have and the US doesn’t even qualify for the “B” in Banana.
Not even close. Yeah buddy.
Yes, Trump is interfering with elections with his lack of government oversight. The President of the United States is the major distraction in this country. That you can't see this (or won't) simply means you want what you want out of this country—damn rule of law and proper leadership. I am sick of conservative denials and the 'horse' those denials right in own too! We're going to resist becoming Trump-nation and if that means resisting conservativism and its "movement" (which sold out the rule of law for a hybrid form of tyranny (just don't know it yet)), then so be it!
Resistance is futile. We are freedom. We are the rule of law. We are individual rights and liberty. We are a strong economy and leadership. We are America.
Hope that works out for you and that you can bring us out of the depths of the Banana Republicry that Trump has managed to cause in our 240 year old country in only two years.
Oh the humanity!!
And, how is 'State of Jefferson' working out these days in taking land from California?
"Denial" is not a river in Egypt. . . . Trump is full of it and I am sick of conservative denials and the 'horse' those denials ride in on too! We're going to resist becoming Trump-nation and if that means resisting conservativism and its "movement" (which sold out the rule of law for a hybrid form of tyranny (just don't know it yet)), then so be it!
That’s okay. After over two years of it I’m tired of all the butthurt snowflakery coming from the left.
You’re fooling no one. No one.
You're just throwing up 'dirt' into the air and all it creates is a makeshift 'cloud.' Time is on the side of truth—not lies.
Nah, i'm just paying attention.
Time will tell but i suspect 2020 is going to make 2016 feel like it was a picnic for you.
Best to gird your loins now. So they are well girded if and when that time comes.
My loins are 'girded'—thank you very much! You should stop kicking against the goads and "gameness" don't mean you always take home the prize! I think I touched on everything there!
Whew! You can't imagine my relief in hearing that.
Very proactive of you. Good job!
And how "gamey" of you! That's all!
Nah, i took a shower this morning so that can't be it.
Let's pretend you have the last word on this. Okay?!
That is good for me, Bro.
A self professed comedian with no sense of humor?
Interesting bro .......
This is the link to my video, WELCOME TO MY COMING OUT PARTY - As a Liberal!
Okay! That was engaging and another work of appreciative art, ETPDNRI!
You wanted comments - so that is what I got to for you:
Other than that - you are Boss!
I listen to Paul Harvey in "rapture". I had forgotten how gifted he wrote.
Thanks for that memory!
You are a good friend. I need one. Mine have all gone, gone . . . resting on the hill. I too will soon join them, but, I will not be resting. I have always been a "restless soul".
You do you old man, you do you.
You sir, are an artista grafico! Bravo!
So this is one of those "deepfakes" I'm hearing about?
Thank you, as one "artista grafico", to another. I appreciate the "attaboy. C.B., would you do me a favor and re-read my article, "Eat The Press - Do Not Read, Unmasked by its publisher".
I edited and added some comments about my days at Central State College when I was one of six white freshmen living on campus at the predominately Black University. It was a cultural awakening for me.
Some posters, not here, but, elsewhere feel that it is over the line, even racially insulting. I do not intend it to be so.
I would like to know what you think. It is a work in progress and something that I wanted to do since, 1960.
Where is it (a link, please)?
Hell, if I know. I edited for the 5th time, earlier today, perhaps, I did not update it when I closed the page.
The damn thing is gone. I was just getting comfortable with it, too.
Freakin' Russian bots are worst than Right Wing, Evil-genitals hopped upon Conservative Ideology.
F----ed, again! And, no money to show for it!