Sad: Candidate Who Bankrupted Campaign Will Never Have Opportunity To Fix Nation's Economy

Via: GregTx  •  Satire  •  13 Comments  •  4 Likes  •  2 months ago

“WASHINGTON, D.C. — Voters around the nation were immeasurably grieved to hear that the candidate who overspent her campaign account by millions of...”

Jimmy Kimmel Ratings Soar After Debuting New Segment Where He Stands There All Sad And Cries Like A Wuss

Via: GregTx  •  Satire  •  29 Comments  •  6 Likes  •  2 months ago

“U.S. — Ratings for Jimmy Kimmel's late-night show soared this past week after he debuted a new segment where he just stands on stage and cries like...”

The first female president will be a Republican

Via: GregTx  •  Today's America  •  49 Comments  •  3 Likes  •  2 months ago

“Immutable characteristics don't make someone more deserving of the office of the president. This is a lesson Democrats, fresh off a massive...”

Trump To Declare January 6 A National Holiday

Via: GregTx  •  Satire  •  13 Comments  •  3 Likes  •  2 months ago

“PALM BEACH, FL — Sources close to President-Elect Donald Trump confirmed that the he would declare January 6 a new national holiday as soon as he...”

In the end, it was the economy, stupid

Via: GregTx  •  News & Politics  •  5 Comments  •  2 months ago

“The moment Democrats and the lying economists cheering them on decided that full employment mattered more than a stable dollar and strong wages,...”

Nation Excited To Have President Again For First Time In 4 Years

Via: GregTx  •  Satire  •  2 Comments  •  3 Likes  •  2 months ago

“U.S. — The results of a new Gallup poll reveal Americans are excited to finally have a new president for the first time in four years.”

What you didn't hear about on election night: The other 43 states

Via: GregTx  •  Today's America  •  2 Comments  •  3 Likes  •  2 months ago

“The little-reported news from the presidential election is how much former President Donald Trump expanded his support in states he lost but by...”

Trump Wins 3rd Election In A Row

Via: GregTx  •  Satire  •  15 Comments  •  3 Likes  •  2 months ago

“U.S. — The votes are in. The people have spoken. Donald J. Trump, the 45th President of the United States, has just won his third presidential...”

Radicalized Squirrels In MAGA Hats Begin Uprising

Via: GregTx  •  Satire  •  4 Comments  •  1 Like  •  2 months ago

“U.S. — After government authorities seized and executed the beloved squirrel known as "Peanut", squirrels across America donned tiny MAGA hats and...”

Biden Fitted With Muzzle So He Can't Bite Any More Babies

Via: GregTx  •  Satire  •  7 Comments  •  1 Like  •  2 months ago

“WASHINGTON, D.C. — Out of an abundance of caution, the White House confirmed Thursday that President Joe Biden had been fitted with a muzzle to...”