Article History
Mike Jonson, Speaker of the Louse, SCREAMED out his fellow girlfriends, "I am NOT GAY", even though no one ask.
By: Eat The Press Do Not Read It • Satire • 6 Comments • 2 Likes • one month ago
“"The Tooth Will Out You" - Symonds Freeohlies”
BREAKING NEWSDirect from "Broke My Back Mountain"In a shocking lack of decorum, Speaker of the Louse, Mickey Johnson, lashed out at his fellow girlfriends, screaming, "I am NOT GAY! I just look that way"!He, quickly followed up with this explanation, which no one believed:"My wife cure me in just...
Mickey Johnson GIVES it up!
By: Eat The Press Do Not Read It • News & Politics • 5 Comments • 3 Likes • one month ago
“"Conversion Therapy DOES NOT ALWAYS WORK!" - DE Santos”
BREAKING NEWSDirect from "Broke My Back Mountain"In a shocking lack of decorum, Speaker of the Louse, Mickey Johnson, lashed out at his fellow girlfriends, screaming, "I am NOT GAY! I just look that way"!He, quickly followed up with this explanation, which no one believed:"My wife cure me in...
Left Leaning Wing-Nut. It is time for another lecture from the "Less Than Esteemed", Jonathan Livingston Pigeon-Poo, "Doctored"!
By: Eat The Press Do Not Read It • News & Politics • 40 Comments • 5 Likes • one month ago
“"If you don't think I am "Doctored". Just look in my Medicine Chest. I take one, two, maybe three hundred pills a day. If I ain't "DOCTORED", who...”
You know what's got my panties in an uproar? "Dirty Diaper Donnie" is such a scoundrel and a cheapskate that he is now advertising for WIPERS to work for nothing.My "Secret Inside/Outside Sauce" (Melanoma) explained to me that Donnie is so cheap he doesn't pay his "WIPERS".He makes them pay...
Republicans elect CRAZIES, I should know, I was once one.
By: Eat The Press Do Not Read It • News & Politics • 9 Comments • 3 Likes • one month ago
MAGA LOONS, why do you support candidate like Marjorie Taylor Green say such thing as these, in public, not just in bars, brothels, or House of Repute.1. SCHOOL SHOOTINGS - Aren't real.2. PELOSI SHOULD BE EXECUTED3. JANUARY 6th WAS DONE BY BLM4. SANDY HOOK WAS FAKED5. JEWS WITH SPACE LASER START...
I NEVER KNEW MY MOTHER - She died at childbirth. Her own.
By: Eat The Press Do Not Read It • News & Politics • 20 Comments • 2 Likes • one month ago
“"I am a FROZEN EMBRYO, I am, I am!" Jonathan Livingston Pigeon-Poo”
Fellow NEWS TALKERS.commies, we, and by that I mean, all of us, have experience pain in our lives.(NOTE: If you haven't, yet, I can send some your way, for only $50.00 for my INTRODUCTION fee. You will never be the sane, or same, again)My Pappy, "Snappy" passed when he was only nine years old,...
"Well, SUCK My Crayon. Donnie is getting his ARSE KICKED"
By: Eat The Press Do Not Read It • News & Politics • 11 Comments • 2 Likes • 2 months ago
“If you like SHAT, then you will lick this...er..."like" this! - Jonathan Livingston Lipschitz”
Fellow NEWSTAKERS.COMMIES, this is the "down in the dirt", Jonathan Livingston Lipschitz, coming to you, "LIVE" from INSIDE URANUS!You know, that scratchy, itchy feeling you get, that ain't HEMORRHOIDS, that is our, "POTTY-CAST," coming to you "LIVE" from INSIDE:U R A N U S!Friends, High School...
"TRUMP IS SO POOR THAT" ---(fill in the blank an play the new game for families.
By: Eat The Press Do Not Read It • News & Politics • 48 Comments • 3 Likes • 2 months ago
“"LAUGHTER is the best medicine when drunk"! - Winos Anonymous”
Great News, my beloved, bored, "News Slaker. commies"!You will never again be bored if you swallow my advice, mouth wide open, like in your teen days at the funky, chunky, get-some-smooching, DIVE-IN movie, French kissing every pimpled-faced teenager in your car, regardless of "Race, Creed or...
Trump is desperate! He is selling "AUTHOGRAPED USED DIAPERS"!
By: Eat The Press Do Not Read It • News & Politics • 13 Comments • 1 Like • 2 months ago
“"Dirty Diaper Donnie" is losing his SHAT and needs your help! - Jonathan Lipschitz, Part Time Idiot & Full Time Moron”
That's right, folks, DJT is broke and needs to raise over 650 million dollars, ASAP, or his properties will seized by Etta James, or some other great vocalist.Folks, this is your opportunity to save your HERO's oversized Heini by purchasing an "AUTOGRAPHED" Dirty Diaper, from DJT, on sale today,...
A VOTE for a convicted felon, TRUMP, is a vote for CHAOS!
By: Eat The Press Do Not Read It • News & Politics • 322 Comments • 10 Likes • one month ago
“"The right of the Citizen of the United States shall not be abridged..."! - The Constitution of the United States of America, not by Trump's mouth!"”
Our country, yours and mine, is being threatened from within and without. These are perilous times when IDIOTS, deadbeats, extremists, and unqualified MAGA-LOONS are voted into office by angry, right-wing, so-called "CHRISTIAN NATIONALISTS", in violation of the FIRST AMENDMENT of the Constitution...
The Supremes Are Protecting Donnie from going to PRISON!
By: Eat The Press Do Not Read It • News & Politics • 36 Comments • 5 Likes • 2 months ago
“"Dirty Diaper Donnie" is losing his SHAT and needs your help! - Jonathan Lipschitz, Part Time Idiot & Full Time Moron”
My Fellow NewsTalkers.commies, it appears that the Right Wing, Conservative Re-Puritans, and Christian Dopes are, per usual, masquerading as "Justices of the Supreme Court of Trumpism".My, oh my, how far we have fallen. MAGA LOONS are supporting a man who must wear super-large DEPENDS because he...